C*m Flavored Chocolate

Jim: 0:05

This episode we are just angry and we should be well,

Bobby: 0:08

you learned something new every day. almond flavor. COMM

Jim: 0:10

chocolate is not my thing. Sorry. Because I'm Fox who vote for that.

Bobby: 0:14

Are you so mad bro?

Jim: 0:16

For life?

Bobby: 0:17

I don't want to talk to you. Tomorrow I hate you. I know I look at myself more than I probably should.

Jim: 0:24

And just like that,

Bobby: 0:25

look how happy we are. We're so hot. We're so young. We're so hip.

Jim: 0:28

Do you recall that? I did hook up with a foot fetish, man. Now what if a woman can you define a woman?

Bobby: 0:35

I don't know. I feel like I'm gonna throw up.

Unknown: 0:36

Warning. The following is extremely funny and inappropriate. Listener discretion is advised.

Bobby: 0:52

Hello, everybody, welcome to not Well, I am Bobby. I am Jim and we are here. Again. We're back. Sorry.

Jim: 0:59

I'm sorry, we didn't give up yet. But you know

Bobby: 1:01

what? When you're in the top 10%, or whatever, 2.5 or five, or 25% 100% is counting who's counting the percentage when we're on top when you're at least five and you're at least below 9%? Honey?

Jim: 1:13

That's true, though. We're in the top 1%

Bobby: 1:17

of failing population. Okay, and that's fine.

Jim: 1:21

We remembered our name this week. We did and that's the start and I realized that well, that's only one glass in well,

Bobby: 1:27

I did also take my Eddie already so that's gonna be hitting any moment now and to get ready because honey, once it hits I know I'm really sorry. Like I know last week I went deep but I'm really not even kidding. I even took a picture on my phone of a new story. You others you're talking about when you said the earth body as the earth I really am convinced that we are in a bigger body right now. Like we are as we are on a cell Okay, in a bigger body. Earth is a cell Yeah. Bigger body. Yeah, so it's the universe. Right? Okay. But it's like actually like think of it like in the same terms. Like it all works together. There's a reason why all works.

Jim: 2:02

So the universe is like a human running around like getting their iced coffee going to work. Correct. Being gay being gay never has gay by the way.

Bobby: 2:11

Well, we're you don't have those kind of colors in your life.

Jim: 2:15

By the way, those colors are added by NASA. I did not want to ruin that for you. But all those colors you see, like look at this beautiful Starburst and all these. Those are added by NASA.

Bobby: 2:27

Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, I mean, added by NASA

Jim: 2:31

like all the nebula, the clouds and all the beautiful like college fake. It's all that's added. We are. Sorry, you've

Bobby: 2:41

gotta be fucking kidding me. I'm

Jim: 2:42

serious. I when I found that I was like, devastated. That's what

Bobby: 2:45

makes me think more weird, where it is just not real. There's not even such thing as space. Now. I'm taking my fucking thing back. I'm taking it back.

Jim: 2:53

God should never told me Oh, my God, when you see these pictures, and you're like, oh, it's God's

Bobby: 2:58

beautiful. And it's like, no, it

Jim: 2:59

doesn't look like that. We artists at NASA made that. Now the data points are real. There are clouds of plasma floating around. So they embellish is basically Oh, yeah, fully. They paint that shit. It's like when they're like, Oh, we found a dinosaur bone and they draw a dinosaur. It's kind of like, okay, but that's not what it actually looks like, from our satellites and from the data we have.

Bobby: 3:23

I mean, that I literally I'm really upset.

Jim: 3:26

So this body that you love that's so colorful. It's actually black and white. It's straight. The universe is straight. Right? Great. Shocker. The universe will be showing pictures of its kids to me and I won't care soon. That's what certain people and I'll come back with the dog this picture of Little Billy running around the backyard. He was drooling earlier. Like I I didn't ask Have you ever realized that it's pictures of the kids? It's like, I don't show you pictures of my life.

Bobby: 3:52

I don't show pictures of my whole Well, I

Jim: 3:54

I've I've accidentally shown your whole not much at all. But the

Bobby: 4:02

backside. Now somebody I was watching a tic toc and some guy was talking about when he was younger. That and people looked at him like crazy. But then I was like, I think I might have done this. But like when you were younger, like say like seven to 12 Okay, did you ever climb up on the bathroom counter and like, spread eagle your asshole to look at your asshole? Seven to 12 like you were like kind of bent? Well,

Jim: 4:27

I have not I've done that more recently. Okay, well like on the bathroom counter but on the step I like where you're like oh, have you ever will you use the bathtub like oh the best step in Bath Yeah, true. Oh, yeah. Then

Bobby: 4:38

you host the mirror Yeah, you just face the mirror and then like, you would always want to be like interested in my whole Oh, as

Jim: 4:45

a younger kid. Yes. I was still interested right then like you would like look at me like so. It's so sad. Like, what is it so sad and we are but if my whole could see what if my whole could see the future? It would do it. climb inside and never come out.

Bobby: 5:01

I can't wait to see my hole at 60 Oh, that's gross. And I'll probably have another pilonidal

Jim: 5:11

we probably won't be eating ass after 40 due to the just natural causes no, but

Bobby: 5:14

that's when you're younger ass. Okay, well. Legal well always legal everything is always legal that comes out of my mouth or in my mouth.

Jim: 5:23

Oh my god, you're such a freak.

Bobby: 5:26

I'm being such a freak of nature. So anything that you need to update us on anything?

Jim: 5:31

I did have an MRI. Okay, and you saw my shot. I saw your shot. So titillated. I did take a photo, a video of it okay, so I just saw your dick swinging around. Well, it's nothing impressive, but I sent that to Matt. Okay. While he's at Holy Trinity, and he's our friend who is sitting next to him. I think I heard this and I was like, why? And I did not know that because I only send it to Matt. I didn't send it like to a group chat. So I sent that video to Matt, why would he think and then she didn't say anything. Our friend was just like, okay, like, I guess like, well, I can't see that. And then we get home and Matt's like, Oh, I didn't know that. You're sending that so I played that on like, who else saw it? It's my dick flopping around.

Bobby: 6:23

Did the other males at the table see it too? I have no I there was a couple people that table. I was playing darts at the moment when it happened.

Jim: 6:32

Good thing I don't care but I was like, but still like I'm I send you Hi. Stop opening my video. Don't open any video. I

Bobby: 6:38

send you I don't even people I don't ever when you send me something. Or there's certain people like I just know it could be it could be nudes. It chords screaming fuck

Jim: 6:47

or screaming pussy. Like there's no right when you said Yo Yos or tick tock. They're always Yeah, I don't play in my air pods in a private area. You gotta be private. But yeah, so I took that video before MRI and well, you just saw

Bobby: 7:01

Yeah, he's swinging his dick around with his little Bluse like, what are those things? Hold

Jim: 7:04

those paper gown? I just had a gown on so I lifted the gown up and was like, dude, yeah, and so everyone everyone saw that a lot of people a lot of men helicopter dick. This is something we need to talk about straight men. I'm sure. straight men are into helicopter decking. And I've talked to my straight female friends about it because they want to show off and they're like, oh, yeah, my husband does that. And I'm like, Okay,

Bobby: 7:23

do you do it all the time though?

Jim: 7:25

I sometimes joke after I get other shots that I try that I'm changing. If he walks into the room, I'm like, flat B flat B flat b

Bobby: 7:32

Oh, I just try my hardest to just get on my boxers like Oh,

Jim: 7:37

lap it's fun to fly. I mean I have before you're more of a flop I'm more of a oh my god the earth show.

Bobby: 7:44

It's like a moose knuckle just like

Jim: 7:48

Oh, I feel like in order to love your body you should be flip flopping well I look up I really need to just get it together and I am actually filled you are like I feel really great salad like you are I mean I am I'm doing it and I'm sleeping better so now do it. Now the MRI MRI was absolutely awful. So you go in do they ask us we can go feet first to make you feel better about it. Oh, I was like feet first.

Bobby: 8:11

Yeah, feet first. Oh my god face verse. No, I couldn't do it. I could barely do feet for I know I told you it's like kind of scary. So I

Jim: 8:18

literally had my eyes looking behind my head so I could see now all time and it's like

Bobby: 8:25

yeah

Jim: 8:37

some of them are good beats they are. After I got out I said I can make an album out of some of these beats. And she was like, Oh, why everyone says that goodnight. Literally now now there was some mild motion artifact meaning I did move unaware that I was moving. And she said it's because it can stimulate peripheral nerves. My legs were like twitching and I had no idea why I was like I'm trying to keep my arms are still Why are my legs moving? I was literally like, is it because of your back? No, it's just the MRI I guess twitches your nerves. Some people some people Yeah, that's so is it a null and void or? No, it worked and I have a bulging disc.

Bobby: 9:15

Do you really have a bulging? Oh

Jim: 9:16

five so that's one day babe. Hey, how you're feeling really hurt all queen have an L five s one. When you have to take a dig in your hole you're bending over like impossible impiety honestly,

Bobby: 9:32

I just think my pile Nemesis gave me the problems. Like I know I had a bulging disc and I was like me who's the SAS that kept like pushing against them no, no, that's not it. But good thought you need to read my book The How do I how to fix your choices. How do I book choice how to fix your back pain. Dr. Sarno as I've talked about a bit I've talked about it I'm we're not we're not gonna go into it.

Jim: 9:51

But yeah, so I'm gonna get an injection and I'll be fine. I'm going to get some Botox. I'm gonna get some steroid.

Bobby: 9:55

Have you ever heard of Now speaking of like uncontrollable twitching and uncontrollable body movements. Have You Ever Have you ever heard of persistent genital arousal disorder? Yes. I ran across

Jim: 10:11

a these are women who can sit down and can't stop orgasm mean? It's like

Bobby: 10:15

an angel. Like it's horrible. Like they can't they can't come out of nowhere. And they're like, oh, at the kitchen sink and the one lady gets it had 18 orgasms in a minute. That's like, when does that become? It's not fun. Pleasure becomes pain.

Jim: 10:28

I mean, you're having one orgasm every three weeks. And it's like enough.

Bobby: 10:31

And I would love Tina minute. I would love to have that feeling for a long time. I'd like it to last longer than we'd like a pill that may say like five seconds, right? It's all about workup all that but Oh, and then it's like, okay, but you always think every time you're gonna come back, it's gonna be the best come ever. And it's always like, Okay, well, it was good. But like, that was like yesterday, I want to be like, 20 seconds long, not five.

Jim: 10:53

And I I do feel like there's a lot of buildup for a very limited, I wish it was more. I'm like, Have you ever been drunk? Because it lasts longer? Is that? Am I in trouble? No, I was like to have a disorder.

Bobby: 11:04

For me. That's what my depressants do. And being high, bitter. I sometimes makes me more horny, though. I've seen you on weed. But also I get really tired too. So it just depends on what position I'm in. You're hornier but you're not gonna do anything. I'm here. But I'm still just gonna lay here and wait for you to suck me. And that's that's my role. I decided that's why I rolled when I was younger to turn off. Mike. An Off mic situation. I am not by any transplant. I mean, I mean, I kind of am we're getting there. For sure. Uh, so some things happened in America this week that are embarrassing. Yeah, I made a clip. I don't know how well it's gonna go. I'm just to be honest. But I was laughing my ass off with these people that were here this weekend. And for some reason, I decided that well, let me talk about this. I'm gonna talk about Beavis and Butthead for a second. Because to watch it I know we talked about this briefly, I think was a cartoon. Yes. But I never really watched it at all in one way or the sorry, but what was the one where sorry? Humans were playing it.

Jim: 12:06

I thought there was a human Beavis and butt it is. Oh, it's not a cartoon, or it is also I didn't know there's a human one. I don't know. There was like Mike Myers and Dana. Carvey, that's

Bobby: 12:16

just done party on excellent. It's kind of similar. No, that's Ted. Last Oh, rock gone party on accident, dude. It's the same kind of thing. It's famous and I think Galileo, when you say it, you'll know Wayne's World. Wayne's World, already on excellence is different than Wayne's World different but similar and I was like, really high when I was talking Beavis and Butthead. I'm blowing. Start laughing harder because I'm like, Oh, my God. I'm Beavis and Butthead. But when I'm high you are. So it makes sense. Like people were always high. I think that was the whole like, stick. So like, now when I watch it, I'm like, that's, like a what? me on the bus guy there. This is me. So then I got to thinking I was like, well, there's a lot of stuff happening in America and the way that the people in that motherfucking

Jim: 13:09

Senate, which Senate or the Senate, it's racist, it's horrible, and like, why I'm like, No, literally, we created it. So the southern states had power. I can't they weren't gonna join the union. They weren't gonna join as a country with us if we didn't give them that type of power. Go away. Go back seat again. Nowadays, you have the senators representing less Americans and like, why don't we revise

Bobby: 13:30

so hard for trashes aides? No offense our southerners but

Jim: 13:33

like in West Virginia vote has more power than someone in California. Yeah, your vote has more power, but

Bobby: 13:37

Virginia actually seceded from Virginia because they wanted to be in the north though. They want to be union and that's

Jim: 13:41

fine back in 1860. But

Bobby: 13:45

right now honey, mansion money.

Jim: 13:48

I don't need him representing us.

Bobby: 13:49

So you know, the senator Ted Cruz and all these people. It's like we're gonna fucking Beavis and Butthead episode so like, what if I merge them together?

Unknown: 13:57

He tng brown Jackson Supreme Court confirmation hearing if Beavis and Butthead were there. The one thing I can promise you you will not be vilified. You won't you will not be attacked. I hope that you will see I'm an Hispanic man could could I decide I was an Asian man. What would I have the ability to be an Asian man acts Chinese gave us what? The Chinese Can we send white people back to Europe? Oh, you mean like Mexican? Senator, to the extent that you are asking me about what actually I actually don't know the answer to that question. I'm sorry. What if I told you I had an invention that could change your whole life? Something that could put a smile on your butt. Senator, I'm not able to answer your question. You're asking me about hypotheticals and and that makes it like uncomfortable for me to work and stuff. Senator personally, I think you dropped something.

Bobby: 15:10

So I just kept going on and on with it girl.

Unknown: 15:14

Girl. Well, Senator, babies are racist babies. Oh, no.

Bobby: 15:22

So his senate is like a fuckin MTV Late Night Show. It is it is embarrassing because it's like, why? And then you saw

Jim: 15:30

remember Marcia from Tennessee asking her how to define a wow. Yeah, it's like, Wait, why I feel like I had a claim as well. That's not her job. She's literally a judge. She's overqualified. For this position. This black woman overqualified, he's listening. And she's like, all these fucking idiots. These fucking idiots have to answer questions from it's bad.

Unknown: 15:51

And let me just ask you this question. So if you are on that stand and a senator to ask you to define the word woman, what would you say? I would say I am a woman. I am a female. Females are women. What?

Bobby: 16:05

Exactly that's a bit. So after the soda, I don't even know who the fuck she is. I'm like, how are these people elected officials?

Jim: 16:12

They're just a bunch of racist white people. It's

Bobby: 16:14

like it's bad. It's so blatantly obvious. Yeah,

Jim: 16:17

it's bad. Everyone at Coney Barrett and like eight weeks was a firt. Like, no question. Ted Cruz was like, Oh, do

Unknown: 16:22

you play the piano? Kids play the pay your kids play for a ranch?

Jim: 16:26

Do you want me to read Green Eggs and Ham again on the Senate floor? He's such a Toolbag.

Bobby: 16:32

I fucking hate all of them.

Jim: 16:34

It's just like we how are they're all getting busted up. It's just they are it's insane that they represent well first of all, can we go to the base of all this Supreme Court is a joke. We should not have a rights decided by unelected people who are appointed for life. Like you have Clarence Thomas. I think it was like 1992 that he was put on the hate die already. It's been 30 years since he's been on the court and we didn't elect him and he is a fucking Well, first of all, that is weird when you think about it. Remember how remember Nina? Yeah, yeah. Wow, weird. Yeah, brothers.

Bobby: 17:09

Now coming up with his dumb wife, who's

Jim: 17:12

his fucking dumb wife, because it's all about to be texting Trump's chief of staff about how to overturn the election, while Clarence Thomas is deciding cases about overturning the election. And he doesn't recuse himself. Right. And he's the only one who dissented in the case that just dismissed Trump's challenge to January 6 committee

Bobby: 17:31

and it's like how are we how's this like so blatantly obvious? Right, but it's rigged so he's

Jim: 17:35

going to bed with his crazy cue and on why Oh, my God who is working with the President to overturn it

Bobby: 17:40

and then she's talking to him about how God overturned the talking about Trump was Jesus Christ and like she's comparing she's absolutely

Jim: 17:47

insane. And she is she's married to one of the nine Supreme Court justices who decide her lives literally our right to get married. It's how I felt when I was up there when I was walking around look at it

Bobby: 17:57

you're like this is where everything happens. And who the fun who's doing it?

Jim: 18:01

Who's doing it? He's jokey like Washington pointed three people to a nine person for sure how he got he's a one term president He's trash

Bobby: 18:11

Well that's why I need Clarence Thomas to move on now that I mean die and that by that I mean die. I really don't give a fuck anymore.

Jim: 18:17

I would love for him to die in the next couple months

Bobby: 18:20

and then I want to just fucking die and then hopefully you put somebody on the fucking court.

Unknown: 18:24

I am not by any transplant

Jim: 18:25

I will transform it to not Elena Kagan who's that she's on there but if you Google a pic, you might think she's a non binary trans femme a and yeah, non binary trans fam. Oh, okay. Really? There you go. I mean, well, I love her. I'm obsessed with her. But there you have it. Like, oh, yeah,

Bobby: 18:46

I didn't know that. Well. You learn something new every day. I

Jim: 18:48

guess that Obama appointee.

Bobby: 18:50

I guess that spots taken you and I mean, we got to find a

Jim: 18:54

she's young thing God. And Catan she's young to like we need

Bobby: 18:58

Catan G is so overqualified. It's disgusting.

Jim: 19:02

Literally.

Bobby: 19:03

It's embarrassing. 20 Barrett did nothing before being she didn't even know the answers to like the question like a basic question of like, What are the five articles of whatever and

Jim: 19:12

she's like, I'm speech press religion assembly. I don't know. What am I missing redress or protest?

Bobby: 19:19

But I'm just like, I cannot. I can't how gross it's sick.

Jim: 19:23

It's gross. It's like first. And the thing is, when we talk about qualifications, there are no qualifications by the way. No, I know. Because I think we've had former presidents on the court like we've had random people who've done nothing there. There's nothing in the Constitution is like you have to be a lawyer for this long you know, you can literally be anybody's like, appoint whoever you want as long as they're an adult. So there aren't people are like, well, I don't think they're qualified. I'm like, What are the qualifications? Right? That's why we shouldn't have

Bobby: 19:49

What's your fucking Harvard?

Jim: 19:52

Anyone else's LSAT scores Tucker Carlson.

Bobby: 19:55

Oh, that motherfucker. When you see a little dick, you know, no offense or a little bit But Jesus Christ he's a little dick straight doesn't own it. Straight Guy which I don't even I love my little strains but I don't think he's actually straight a great I really don't well Lindsey Graham is a well known closeted homosexual that fucking queen to he literally oh yeah he's called boy they call him mom lady Ladybug.

Jim: 20:16

Yeah cuz he has he has a ton of boys in DC Yeah

Bobby: 20:19

Why would his dumbass though like what I think is funny about him is he's like now. Now tell me how important your faith like how many times you go to church? I mean I only go three times a year so I'm bad but what about you? How important is it to you?

Jim: 20:30

Yeah, why is that a question? So

Bobby: 20:32

why does it matter? She said, if it's not important to you, but you're still asking them why?

Jim: 20:37

Because what I'm Fox who vote for that, okay? That's what Marsha is like. Now what is a woman? Can you define a woman?

Bobby: 20:44

Are you gonna do with anything? Which also I think somebody said like there isn't really a technical there's

Jim: 20:49

not and there shouldn't be it doesn't changes with time when used to do a bunch of things that women don't have to do now. Oh, stay in the kitchen. Yeah, I love AB no fan. Women don't do that shit anymore.

Bobby: 20:58

Half these women wouldn't know this is gonna be a little shade. But half these women that are sitting here bitching on fucking the Senate floor and in the House of Representatives. They're all fucking they wouldn't be able to talk. They wouldn't be on your fucking knees. Listen.

Jim: 21:12

Let's write your husband. And it wouldn't be sitting there honey. That was only like 80 years ago feminist did that for you? Right? And now you're like trying to turn back the clock now? We have a mouth. Okay, honey, actually,

Bobby: 21:22

don't even go there. Your mouth. You're gonna keep turning the back and then all of a sudden you're gonna be back in time. And then you're gonna be pissed that you had it's just like,

Jim: 21:28

watch Handmaid's Tale like we're literally had it that is, but people don't want to admit it. They're like, Oh, everything's Han.

Bobby: 21:33

Well, that's what I feel about this war with Russia. Like we're sitting here like, yeah, we're supporting you, but really not and then we might just have to go a little bit. I'm a little bit afraid if we don't we're gonna get caught blindsided and it's gonna be worse, even though the same conclusion is gonna happen. We're all gonna fight. So let's just get it over with Moscow. But honestly, I'm really sad for the people.

Jim: 21:51

I'm sad for the Russians who are like now have no they have no idea. They have no money don't even know what's going on. They're like, we don't have any brand. They can't even order a pizza from Pizza. I mean, they can't do anything now there's no everyone's pulled out you

Bobby: 22:01

know you can do now you can overturn your fucking Yeah, it's your turn. Now it's time to fight and battle. Everyone.

Jim: 22:06

You didn't care. Get out on the streets. I know. Everyone gets rested. They can't run.

Bobby: 22:10

Right? If everybody goes everybody goes attacks, go fucking kill him. Period, assassinate that motherfucker.

Jim: 22:17

Now Biden basically said he can't stay in power and got a lot of trouble for that, by the way, because then people were like, you're talking about regime change. And a lot of the smaller countries where we already have done regime change are bad. You know, like Central America, Africa, all these other kind of Middle East. They're like, Oh, us really talking about this again.

Bobby: 22:33

I think it didn't work. I think he really meant just like he needs to be out of power to this. He can't do a war like again. Yeah, he needs to be taken out of power by the citizens have rights.

Jim: 22:43

Any American is really interested and trying to figure out who's going to lead the Russians. It's just that is and you need to do better. That's all be best. be best. Bless be blessed. Be blessed. Now. What's a woman?

Bobby: 22:57

A man's a man? If you're a man and you're a male, then I'm a man if you have a penis

Jim: 23:02

than you are, man,

Bobby: 23:03

oh, okay. Okay, bitch. And to top things off, we continue on that little journey with these. I mean, I have like, Okay, so the next this is like ridiculous.

Unknown: 23:16

Electric vehicles and his bicycles. And he and his husband, kids stay out of our girls bathroom. What?

Bobby: 23:26

Yep, that was at this conference. And this is also somebody else

Unknown: 23:28

over this country. People want to ask me all the time while I'm running I'm sick and tired. I'm sick and tired of them wanting to teach CTR and to school. Why critical race theory. Can you tell me what that mean? Can you We're Americans. We're not black. We're not white. We're American.

Bobby: 23:48

These are the same this the same thing? What

Unknown: 23:50

is that?

Bobby: 23:51

What does this what's leading Republican Party? Republican Party? Like? Why don't you? Are you so mad bro? Like you're fucking mad at people to Justin's husband because they can ride their bikes around DC and electric vehicles and not be ridiculed by people like in Georgia helped

Jim: 24:06

me out here. We want to bitch about high gas prices. But then we want to bitch about electric vehicles, which would free us from high gas prices, but

Bobby: 24:13

you're probably a big oil. That's why you're not saying Oh, Exxon Valdez and also how the fuck What the fuck? The judge and his husband are not going into the girls bathroom because well, it's

Jim: 24:26

a problem. They equate anyone LGBTQ with pedophilia. That's the q&a.

Bobby: 24:30

I just love that. That's so stupid.

Jim: 24:32

I think every day is recruiting your children. They're grooming our children.

Bobby: 24:36

I don't want to talk to your God. No, I hate

Jim: 24:40

I literally hate your kids. I don't want to see the pictures.

Bobby: 24:43

I don't I don't want I don't care about their prom. I'm not going any of that bullshit. No, we don't have to deal with that.

Jim: 24:48

Oh, look at that little Tammy Faye is going down to the prom. She got herself a boyfriend. She's pregnant again. You know, oh, like I don't care about your children. We groom them

Bobby: 25:00

Don't need like we have a meeting we have like all the faces and organ or Billy Smith over there.

Jim: 25:04

Oh, he's a really old Billy Gene. He's he'll be a good guy. We don't have time for that. There's no such thing as a good day anyway like what is having a husband have to do with going and girls bathroom but this is what this is what they equate it to the meanwhile straight men are raping women left and right and abusing them and beating them. But then they're worried about trans women going into girls bathrooms and being a menace. They're just trying to take a shit in a pistol everyone else you have anyone? Anyone you know in your life any female in your life was ever been threatened or assaulted by a trans woman? No. Now how many do you know who have been raped beaten?

Bobby: 25:39

Man more than I want to say?

Jim: 25:40

My sister has a victim of sexual assault. I was you, girl. Let's not bring that. Thank you for listening. We're talking about women right now. Let's get back to a white male as a three year old Yeah, like we're talking about women. But yeah, I'm just saying like the threats are imagined or imagined. They're pretend but they're to try to get everyone angry. So like CRT, it's not even real critical. A TR CTR is taught in colleges, nine schools,

Bobby: 26:10

but they think because of talking about anything that has to do with

Jim: 26:13

anything with race. They feel guilty because they know because they're racist. And now

Bobby: 26:17

that was a black guy saying that which is interesting to me, because I feel like a lot of what did he say

Jim: 26:21

we're not black. We're not white, we're American. That's not true. We are black and white. And there are differences in outcome if

Bobby: 26:25

you lacquer 100% differences in health outcome economic outcome. If it was so simple for all Americans, we wouldn't even be in this problem that Why are

Jim: 26:33

cops killing more black people than white people? Literally every single category that you're in in your life, it's a different outcome if you're black or white. So we're not just Americans your color, the color of your skin matters. It does. Why aren't they talking about that? Because they're afraid

Bobby: 26:47

they're afraid and they're not going to talk about it if they're little platforms of land at their far right. White Nationalist platform and on rants. I mean, they're all heard about the Iowa law like with abortion. Oh, yep. You have how like if you get a family yeah, so if you get raped and you decide to abort the baby from your rapist, a 16 year random raper, okay, their parent his parents say, Oh, well, she got an abortion. She got an abortion. They can fucking sue you for like up to $20,000 and like all this shit, because you decided to get your aborted baby. Or you aborted your baby from a rapist but their son? Yeah. Do you? Are you like, are we following?

Jim: 27:26

This is pro life. Apparently, this is pro life. They call it pro life. Meanwhile, they're gonna have the beggar gonna a rapist victim, a rape victim, you're gonna sue her. You're gonna sue the rape victim for not the rapist? No, the rapist probably walks free, but the victim is gonna have to either have a baby you're suing. So either you have the baby or you lose 20,000 or 15 year old and you have to have the baby. Like literally think about this shit. It makes you or your sister and you're like, Oh, she has to carry this baby to term because we don't want we don't want to get sued. We don't have $20,000 We can't get sued and anyone in that family. It's not just like Will the parent know it will be like, even like it can relate the rapist cousin? Yeah, like it's like anybody who's connected within one his best friend who edged him on and told him to rape her at the bar that night. That cousin can sue I mean, it's literally insane. It really is when I saw that I was like, oh, so we're in trouble avenge. This is called your Yeah, we're in trouble. We're in trouble. The biggest problem is the Supreme Court is allowing all this to happen. And this goes back to why we don't need the fucking Supreme Court. Right to get rid of it. It should be a term limited

Bobby: 28:28

is what your what's your alternative than to the Supreme Court has or hasn't really gotten elected?

Jim: 28:33

I like that. Okay, you're on for five years. You're on for 10 years. And we elect you, along with the president along with the Congress. Like this is bullshit. Interesting. I don't want a bunch of people appointed by one term presidents right, that are irrelevant. Now literally, like these people that Trump appointed. They're gonna be on for 30 plus years. We hope they're in their 30s Like they're not gonna pass but we hope something happens to them. Honestly. Like, and this is gonna be me, Jim, and I don't give a fuck. I'm going to look cry, but I'm ready to just pull up my whole 401k Oh, you don't even leave me at drop. I don't even got a refrigerator over there.

Bobby: 29:07

I don't even fucking dribble.

Jim: 29:10

Marijuana I'm like, you're lucky

Bobby: 29:15

she's such a whore. I

Jim: 29:16

hate her. And I know her. Who is that? Mark? Mark.

Bobby: 29:19

Are you Taylor? Oh,

Jim: 29:20

Marjorie Taylor green.

Bobby: 29:21

I know that person. She's a Nazi. By the way, by the way, she's her district is just next to where I grew up. And that tracks and it tracks so that tracks I mean, as you can see it like Karen Ramler deleted me on Facebook. That's this Karen handler it's

Jim: 29:39

literally Karen she's voting for she's like, Oh, for sure. Marjorie. I fucking love Marjorie. She actually stands up for our children. She hates Kranz.

Bobby: 29:48

I hate her cheek. Trans. She hates racist babies and she hates queers.

Unknown: 29:53

Oh, okay. Like what? Okay, so I love

Jim: 29:57

this app. So we're just angry and we should be working angry.

Bobby: 30:00

I mean, honestly, like, I don't want to be like super. I don't wanna be super angry, but like this week has been a little rough for America

Jim: 30:06

to watch and I can only imagine being a black woman and watching this shit. Yeah, I mean, I sorry, not can only I can't imagine. No, it's just fucked up. It's really sad. So it's the first time a black woman has been appointed to the Supreme Court. And she took it and she got there and she's like, Okay, well, my job Howard for

Bobby: 30:25

powerful woman, powerful woman. And powerful woman.

Jim: 30:31

You know, can you define women? No,

Bobby: 30:33

I can't. Um, they have to have a policy. Well, there has to be some kind of home we all have axles so road backhoe

Jim: 30:40

front hole, black hole, Tom.

Bobby: 30:42

Back hole. Oh, we're gonna go put on the back nine.

Jim: 30:46

Or, Oh, no golf.

Bobby: 30:48

Now there was I'm feeling this now. I'm feeling it to me. Like I also I just be like, I don't want to be angry anymore. I

Jim: 30:54

want to get mine. So I wanted to talk about something like the fall of 2020. Like, I remember those episodes. We were just like, we were so angry. Well, we sorry. We were angry. We didn't know what was coming. Can you imagine Trump are still present right now? Okay, I'm done mean angry.

Bobby: 31:10

I know. But we imagine it would be let's go back to go back. Let's go back to 2014.

Jim: 31:16

Things were okay. And on track. Yeah. But like, Would you ever have thought we'd be where we're at today? Absolutely. Not like no. Okay. Like we have a black man in a second term. And the economy is picking up again

Bobby: 31:28

about nope, let's go ahead and just like trash that because a woman wants to run in is actually qualified again. Oh, we don't like her because of her emails. I'm okay. Yeah, we're not making anymore. We are not angry.

Jim: 31:39

Happy. We are one. So we are a maverick Cannes. Yeah,

Bobby: 31:45

I noticed something that I was doing the other day. And I just need to know if I'm the only one. Okay, do you when you're FaceTiming? Do you look at the person or do you look at yourself?

Jim: 31:54

I look at the person. Oh. And then I feel bad. Because I'm like, when they look at my picture, my eyes aren't looking at the camera. They're looking down at the screen. So they think I'm not looking at them. But I'm like, I'm rather I'd rather look at you. And look at this little hole at the top that I can't see. Do you know what I look at? You look down at yourself. As you are, that's Am I the trashiest trash am? No,

Bobby: 32:20

I know. And I was like you should not say that out loud. I don't give a fuck. First of all, that's embarrassing. Well, it's because I have I'm fat phobic of myself. And I'm nervous. So let's see. I'm always trying to find the right angle. So I don't look ugly. And I don't we're not ugly. That's not the tournament or

Jim: 32:33

something. There's not going to be an angle where you're not correct. So don't look at yourself. Just let yourself be fat.

Bobby: 32:39

Let myself just be me.

Unknown: 32:41

Which is good.

Bobby: 32:43

But I will say this I was able to buckle the buckle both rounds on Southwest to DC. Talking about without the accent. I can't speak. I can't I was on Southwest. Wow. So I actually really surprised that you don't look at yourself while you're FaceTiming

Jim: 33:03

No, because I look at the person's face to see how they're reacting to what I'm saying. So I'm like I need to see their face.

Bobby: 33:08

I mean, I know I go back and forth but I know I look at myself more than I probably should.

Jim: 33:12

I've noticed that when I'm on with you. I'm like oh you would have let me know. You know his thumb.

Bobby: 33:17

It's always me like trying to like make sure I look good. You're like yeah, it's really tiring have to hold your phone up to like a hug. That's what girls do too. They

Jim: 33:24

hold the phone up here to get oh that's like a total isn't what you do we have a skinny move. Not sure why say fat girls? Probably misogyny

Bobby: 33:31

because you're misogynistic white asshole straight. Straight straight pregnant Christian.

Jim: 33:36

Oh, no. By Ray Oh girl by rape okay, and you're sued for the last one me and I got sued for the last one. God damn it. I

Bobby: 33:44

hate this fucking country.

Jim: 33:46

We're not being angry but not angry country.

Bobby: 33:49

Now. What else? Do you have anything else? So I do.

Jim: 33:53

There was last week I was being nice because Matt was going through it. And so you're you know, everyone has support everyone has times in life where

Bobby: 34:03

you're on your low. Yeah, remember me? Nobody's

Jim: 34:07

girl, you had to carry me when I looked back on the beach and I saw one set of footprints. I know you were carrying me. I'm not actually a fan. That wasn't me. That was God. Oh, that was Jesus. Jesus. Right. I was like, you know that story, right? Yeah, he like footprints in the sand. When you saw on water when you saw only one set of footprints that was me carrying you. Well, thank you, Jesus or Bobby. You can carry me I'd break your back.

Bobby: 34:29

Well, I mean, I like not not to change the subject real quick. But like I noticed I was on the floor helping Michael with his back and I was like, had to get down on the floor. I couldn't get the I mean, it was hurting. I was like, I can't be down low on the floor.

Jim: 34:42

No, I can't bend over to pick things up anymore. It's my back. Oh my god. We're old. Okay, anyways, a midlife crisis.

Bobby: 34:48

We're not angry.

Jim: 34:49

We're not angry. We love life we love but yeah, so Matt was going through it so I like got him flowers and chocolates and I realized something chocolates. I personally hate ate any chocolate that has a cream in it. I'm sorry. I'm not actually a fan. Yay. I fucking hate them. If I pick up a delicious looking chocolate oh, it's gonna taste like chalk. I agree. I bite into it. And then some come colored

Bobby: 35:14

orange filling. orange cream. It's like ah

Jim: 35:19

i The worst one is you're like, Oh, this one looks like a big one. It's gonna be a lot of chocolate. Cherry. It's a whole fuck you. Yeah, yeah. And it's like cherry with syrup. Yes. CRPGs like surely Tim is carry

Bobby: 35:34

a not marinade. But for Joel now Jerry cordial support. What are you talking about? The it's like the rap. It's like almost like a jelly Syrah Oh, a marmalade? No.

Jim: 35:46

Okay, just think to yourself for a while and stop interrupting. I'm smoke weed every day. I just and it's like, and Matt has a way around this, I think because he's like, Oh, I like all of them. But he puts them in the fridge, which I don't agree with. He puts all the chocolate the whole box in the fridge to get them cold. So I think that those creams become a little more solid and they taste better or they're better texture, but I just like if I bite into it, it's like it's just like a cream coming out like it looks like come to me. I don't want to bite into an almond flavored come chocolate. almond flavor. Come chocolate is not my thing. Sorry. Now there are the chocolates. I like our honeycomb. Cara Mal. The ones with nuts just like chunks of nuts. Like an turtles. Oh, chocolate. caramel chocolate. Not that combination. But if it's a fucking cream, I'm throwing it out. I literally have bitten into them and thrown them away before. I mean, like I'll bite and then be like, nope, not this one.

Bobby: 36:40

I mean, honestly,

Jim: 36:41

I poke the bottoms too. I like use my eyes my thumb on the bottom of the chocolate to like push up into it. And then if I can tell it soft I'm like put it back I put it back. Oh, so if you ever at my house and you see a thumbed up, if there's a thumbprint in the bottom, it's because I know it's fucking close filled.

Bobby: 36:57

I'm not doing a cream. You're the only cream filled twink there

Jim: 37:00

are the only cream filled chocolate there. And it's white chocolate.

Bobby: 37:03

Oh honey,

Jim: 37:05

but it's a pink feeling.

Bobby: 37:08

I actually hate it too. And I just made me think of something. Do you have you ever had your remember the candies that were like strawberries? Like the wrapper? They're like shiny and the wrapper was like, yes. And they were hard at first on the

Jim: 37:20

inside of the liquid. Fucking kill me sick. You're. You're taking me down a violin.

Bobby: 37:26

I know. I know.

Jim: 37:27

You definitely think of me think of gushers Oh, I can't do Oh, you love Okay, so you're not consistent. I do not do anything that has a liquid filling in the middle. Or a cream thing in the middle. I cannot do hard and then liquid or cream. Nope. You fucking throw it away. Well, those stories gag like I think I might throw if I bite into it. I bought it. No, no, I'm having flashbacks. It's bad when I was in school, like I've been into a gusher once and it's just like, Well, those are big and we were in school grew up we were in school dresses for the thing. Oh everyone, there's

Bobby: 38:01

no commercials.

Jim: 38:02

around all these freaks. I'm like, You guys like gushers like, fuck it. I want to be queer. Like I and that's when you made your choice. And that's when I decided I wanted to suck dick for the rest of my life. He

Bobby: 38:12

made a choice. Choices choices I Bobby Griffith,

Jim: 38:16

I just can't with cream trainee, chocolate. Sorry.

Bobby: 38:18

And that's a valid point, to be honest with you. Like I think I'm glad you're speaking your truth.

Jim: 38:22

You need to know what you like and what you don't like. And you need to be able to vocal about it. And you need to know that what you feel is the most correct thing to feel and that everyone else is wrong. And that's what you need to be secure in your feelings. Honestly, all that matters is you and I there's no video to the end of the simulation. None of it matters. I can't you're logging off for the last time and I

Bobby: 38:42

find out I'm really like skinny and hot in real life. You walk us in the simulations like I want to I want a hard life so wondering myself gay,

Jim: 38:48

fat you you decided to come in at like level minus 10 Yeah, like I'm like I was like I want to be level 50 On initial initially. Yeah. Like start me hard. Give me Yeah, I want I want to be rode hard and put away wet.

Bobby: 39:01

And that's, that's like you and honestly, that's the theme of my life. rode hard and put away. But also I'm probably hot baby when you're older. I suppose. It's like this thing right here.

Jim: 39:10

Yeah. What is that a boil? Oh, right here. Yeah.

Bobby: 39:14

Oh, that's where I see pap. I started like, my pores. How's

Jim: 39:17

that going?

Bobby: 39:18

It's amazing.

Jim: 39:19

I actually think it's working. I think it is. So I can tell you've never been this alert on a Sunday afternoon ever. And you're like, and you were up till 2am Last night. Like there's no that on a normal Sunday, you would be like, Hey, okay, let's go record. Oh, I be like,

Bobby: 39:33

Did you breathe last night? And the answer was no. And the answer's no. Like he didn't i My coworker even said like, Girl, I'm noticing that you're like a little bit more. Just gonna say Quan. Is it quiet? Like I'm kind of a little more on now. I am on a higher medication as well. But I also I didn't have it last Monday, because I

Jim: 39:51

still felt better. Mm hmm. Exactly. I

Bobby: 39:53

was alert. CPAP baby. It's kind of great. Except

Jim: 39:56

Are you gonna go to nasal pillows? Yeah, full mask and it's clogging your pores. You look like a whore

Bobby: 40:01

problem is is that I see I like my mouth open in more ways than one. That's what I've heard. Yeah, it's open for food dick and air. And

Jim: 40:10

I love gagging on a good deck. I

Bobby: 40:12

love gagging on a good oxygen gag on some age to Earth. water in my mouth. Oh to baby. It's just air those I know too. It's like literally are pushing air to open your fucking airways. But anyway, Yes, everything's great with that and you're thriving, and I'm thriving, and I'm living and I need to know what your thoughts are on. We've talked about death. We've talked about heaven, hell, nothing. Do you believe in mediums? And do you believe in psychics?

Jim: 40:44

Depends what you mean by a belief in life. Do

Bobby: 40:47

you think people can see dead relatives and talk to them and bring them? Absolutely not?

Jim: 40:51

Do I like to believe in it? Yes.

Bobby: 40:53

So you want to believe but you just don't. I don't even

Jim: 40:56

want to believe but I like to pretend to believe.

Bobby: 40:59

Is that not so fucked up? That is so true. That's the That's all beliefs. To me. That's all human? Yeah. It's

Jim: 41:06

like God. Yes. Yes. I love you, Jesus. But are you there? And I know, it's pretend. And it's like, you're not tricking me. Like how fucked up when you listen to most mediums. They're saying things. So there's somebody in your life with a P name. And then the person's like, oh, there was a Paul that I knew from? Yes, Paul died of cancer 20 years ago. And then they're like, Paul says, Hello, God. Oh. Oh, and then it's like, and Paul says he's glad that you've moved on and you're happy. And then the person cries. It's like,

Bobby: 41:45

I'll show you some of the

Jim: 41:47

some of the so generic, the spiritual tic tock that I'm on. And then also when you realize how everything is on social media nowadays, so you can look up anyone's history. You can see where they live to they went to school with these mediums can find out everyone in the audience ahead of time, they probably can pay for it to be like, Well, yeah, well, when you go to Oprah, like you give your name, your address, who are saw scar occurring on the gift to give that but you get your ticket, you reserve it ahead of time, okay. The medium for that day knows you're coming months ahead of time. They could have looked everything up, and then you arrive and they're like, Oh, I know you went to high school with because you're graduating cloud,

Bobby: 42:25

like if the whole audience is there, and they're like, somebody in Arizona,

Jim: 42:28

somebody that died with an M? am seen M M is coming. Mary, Mary, Mary Jo, did anyone Oh, Mary, your mom was Mary. She died of cancer like, Okay. Marissa say she knows you went through a lot earlier in life. But she wants to let you know that you are going to be at peace soon. And she knows that you remarried. And yes, you can see marriage license online. Oh, insane. I'm just like, I just buy a house. Yeah, that's a big event that your mom sees that also on your taxes is also on every night. Should we pretend to be mediums like should we like try to like set up a weekend? No, Miss Cleo, honey. Honey, let's

Bobby: 43:05

go to Miss Cleo.

Jim: 43:05

Mama Cleo, comma gays called the gay Oh, mama gay. Mama gay.

Bobby: 43:10

My gay. Oh, she'll tell you the way.

Jim: 43:13

Um, you already have a catchphrase.

Bobby: 43:15

Right? Your credit card registered.

Jim: 43:17

Oh, no way. You're rushing out here you lie. Yeah, you look. I mean, I don't know what it's gonna look like, slutty puffing. Right? Well, the like,

Bobby: 43:27

he looks puffy. He's,

Jim: 43:28

I love him. That's what I love about him. He's like, he's like, I'm a thick boy. He's getting married to a Mormon. Mormon. I mean, why do they live in Utah? You tell me. He's like, I'm from New York City. Now I'm in Utah. I know. He moved to Utah. Oh, honey, Dave and I've been there even see, I've been following it's amazing. The houses I mean, it's beautiful. I mean, it's Salt Lake. Outside. I think Park City or somebody? It's a match. Oh, wait, no, no. No, they're getting married. And they're being featured on the not.com which is like V marriage website. No, he's literally like, yeah, so his life is insane. Like, I just want to say that and all these things are funny because he was at Disney where he was parents and got in trouble and got kicked out and now now he's getting married too. That's what's so weird. It seems completely real. Like he's they're cute as fuck. Yeah, all he would do is mean he's really good. His man is really quiet and kind of just like funny but like a core seems like reserved must

Bobby: 44:23

be the one with the money. Well, oh,

Jim: 44:25

he's money. Yeah, I mean, there is house the ring he bought.

Bobby: 44:30

When you become famous on Instagram all sudden you get these rich men are reaching out to you. And well, we just passed some 100 followers.

Unknown: 44:38

I guess you just have to be prepared to die.

Jim: 44:41

A rich man approached me and offer me anything right now. I would take it all.

Bobby: 44:45

I would say now what would you do? What would be the worst thing you would do for money? Like what would you do if like he was like, I would let him I would bottom for him. Would you fart like in a jar for him? Yeah. Would you let him there was I saw tic tock tic TOCs really on my mind. Today, yeah, because you're young and youthful. That's right. There was a guy that open the doors guy guy, open the door, there's a guy, another older gentleman beef here outside the door on his knees, the guy that opened the door. That's, that's, it's his tick tock. He's barefoot. And so the man starts kissing on his feet, and then hands my bag, which is full of money. And then the guy kicks in with his foot and the old man falls over and he's like, I just got paid.

Jim: 45:24

Who are these be? I need to find these behemoths. Oh my god. Like,

Bobby: 45:27

if you imagine if you just had to open your door and let them kiss your feet, then you kick them and you get like$1,000 Now, no,

Jim: 45:32

I did sucker. Do you remember? Do you recall that? I did hook up with a foot fetish, man. Why? I thought it told you Did I not tell you. I feel like I would relax. I hate feet. While I was in LA. I met a young man. And he came to my hotel room. This is back in November of last year. And while we were hooking up and I was getting ready to, let's say top him, or just a top, top him, so I'm like, you know, blah, blah, blah. I'm on my back. You know, getting ready to have someone ride me just describing it all. No, but he grabbed my leg and I was like, oh, what's he doing? Why am I doing that? I was like, I'm the top like, why are you grabbing my legs? Don't throw them in the air. Honey. You don't want this whole? I've even seen I've seen it or smell. You don't want it. So okay, like that's happening. I'm like, interesting. He starts sucking on my toes. Like backwards here. His back was I'm on my back legs in the air. He grabs my feet. were sucking on my I mean, shabby. mimin not just like, not a little like, I'm gonna fucking throw a taste like he's shoving that flag. I've walked around all day. And these feet. Oh, socks, vans Hollywood Hills.

Bobby: 46:48

I'm setting if I throw out this day. I know. Thank you, but I'm gonna throw so

Jim: 46:53

sucking on them. And I'm like, Oh, interesting. Like he really likes the mock. And I didn't. I was like, that's weird. I've never had that happen before. Have you ever had that happen?

Bobby: 47:04

No, you're not okay. Oh, man. Pam.

Jim: 47:06

Oh, do you have fungus? No. Okay.

Bobby: 47:09

But I just I don't like I do and I don't like

Jim: 47:13

Just kidding. I don't Yeah, I don't like I'm not interested. They're they're they're a thing. Yeah, I look I do look at them.

Bobby: 47:19

So that's the problem is that I judge fee even if my

Jim: 47:23

feet aren't great. I'll look at your feet and you nasty fodder or some straight guys with feet where I'm like, that's gonna be a good deck. You can tell. Yeah, you can tell where the arches good. Not like the toes? Are they actually like, they're totally clean, trim the toenails. There's no hair. Like I love them. Like, that's gonna be a good day. Anyway, so my toes are getting sucked in, like what's happening? And then he goes, You have nice feet now then he climbs on my deck and everything happens and it's fine. But like, and then later, I find out he's like, Yeah, I love your feet. I'm kind of a feet guy and I was like, Oh, I hooked up with a feet guy. You did it. I've never done that before that I talked to feet guy but you didn't know it but I didn't know it at the time when you're me. So now I randomly will send fi pics when he asks see that's where you got to go like kind of dark. You got to get like I'm fine with it. I like Oh, you like my feet pick?

Bobby: 48:10

I want sharp sharted boxers sent

Jim: 48:12

to me for now. No, I couldn't do it. $5,000 Oh, I thought you were saying $10 I'm like that doesn't mean cover the Post No $10,000

Bobby: 48:20

Oh yeah, it's worth of like my every day you send your underwear after the end of the day like 10 grand I don't shirt my underwear every day so that's a shirt let's just say like worn really worn underwear sunup to sundown baby after the jail.

Jim: 48:32

I'll do that 10,000 Absolutely. Every day you put in like I will send it isn't that so bizarre like somebody would pay for someone else's underwear they won't know will write you I don't think your crotch Musk smells that different than mine. Does I actually do think everyone has their own unique challenge accepted? I don't know I feel like I'm gonna throw up your crotch Musk is different than mine. I don't think your balls are any different well I know they're smaller but

Bobby: 48:55

mine are smaller than yours. Yeah, you just summon

Jim: 48:59

flopping around like honey

Bobby: 49:00

oh my god oh yeah, I don't want to think about that also nice babe

Jim: 49:05

Hobby Lobby we need to work on you accepting your dick and balls work on my body like I need to work my body accepting your body because working on your body is not that's like that's a years long project we need to work on the here and now

Bobby: 49:17

here and now. Well, we're going to work on it. Like I really want to be ready for Austin like I really my goal is to like get really trying to be like okay, confident like I want to go shopping for clothes. I want to like we gotta buy alcohol. Nah, baby should even have like a listener dress us that'd be fun. I would love I don't know I always

Jim: 49:35

pick strain like because what we're gonna have to wear an Austin it was not it was 89 degrees yesterday in Austin. I know it's gonna be going there in a month. 89 Yesterday, whether we're gonna die that's just tell you I'm just letting you know. How does the Western have a pool? Yes. On this on the rooftop. Okay, we're we're not going anywhere else. So Right. We're

Bobby: 49:53

gonna go to the pool during the day and get drunk at night and get boys back to the hotel during the day and then drunk at night. He's awesome. We really have no one We are gonna do though is we're gonna we're gonna spread our voice to the Capitol about how disappointed we are in the legislation in Texas

Jim: 50:06

and one thing I do like about Austin is recently Oh, I guess not much because you're young and like the superintendent of the schools decided to go ahead with the LGBTQ Pride Week Oh even though their lives for Texas Attorney General sent them a letter saying like you are in violation of state law because you're discussing sex sexuality by having this Pride week you're discussing sexuality and only parents can discuss sex and sexuality only parents because they know literally because they have any idea okay, like these pumpkin parents talking.

Bobby: 50:40

I say that he said pumpkin parents I like that though.

Jim: 50:43

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Bobby: 51:05

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Jim: 51:27

They are offering a $10 discount coupon at checkout for the next week. hydronic hydration on amazon.com Some love

Unknown: 51:38

has a manger Oh Han has and sweetest sweet Oh no. I'm blocked.

Bobby: 51:49

I like this. Do you think you are more or less attractive than the average person? Why

Jim: 51:57

I Hellboy are in trouble. I think physically I'm barely more attractive than the average person but my personality barely makes up for it to the point where I'm getting I'm getting eight to nines out of 10s for no reason you're six and a half so it's like no literally I feel like I am clearly above a five I don't I don't have facial symmetry. That's

Bobby: 52:23

not true either. So many ugly people.

Jim: 52:25

You I don't have facial symmetry

Bobby: 52:27

it doesn't matter you're still above you're probably like a least a solid six and a half seven

Jim: 52:32

I would say seven you're a solid seven a seven is kind you

Bobby: 52:35

can touch eight though every once in a while. It's got to be everything somebody on fleek

Jim: 52:39

I don't have I have to be not late at night hold I am fleek leak I'm so old I'm saying fleek still but yeah, you're right but I honestly think it's I fully think his personality I have I have hooked up with

Bobby: 52:50

so you do think you're more attractive but it's based on your not your physical parents your mental and wow,

Jim: 52:56

I can pick up a six and a six a seven and I can pick a seven and below evil easily, easily. Oh, oh no. I know. It's

Bobby: 53:04

like a slurs.

Jim: 53:05

I can't have a seltzer right now.

Bobby: 53:07

You're gonna be in trouble because you have got to Lindsay's it's Lindy. Okay, remind. Oh, rough.

Jim: 53:14

This is so rough. Are you more sex para mental or less experimental than the average person?

Bobby: 53:21

Actually, that's really answer. Do you? Yeah,

Jim: 53:24

I know what you're gonna say. But I know the answer. You're gonna say more. It's actually less.

Bobby: 53:28

It's actually funny that you say that though? Because I don't think more means more time. So

Jim: 53:34

it means more like what are you doing? What are you interested in? I

Bobby: 53:37

mean, I rolled around Nutella with somebody and wrestled and Nutella. Don't tell me I'm not. That was 20 years ago. Well,

Jim: 53:42

I was young at one point. We're talking about now now about overall and your whole life? Yes, I

Bobby: 53:48

would absolutely say yes. Less, more weight. Read it again. What's

Jim: 53:51

the argue more experimental or less experimental moving average more? What? Why? What have you done in the past five years that is so what is

Bobby: 53:59

it? Why is five years of my whole life? Why is my whole record? Just five years I've been your whole

Jim: 54:04

record hasn't even been access, except for the past like 10 years or less? Okay, let's go based off that

Bobby: 54:12

on based on my entire sexual experience.

Jim: 54:14

I had no, no, you were comparing to other people.

Bobby: 54:17

I understand. So do you think that most people went and sought to dig in a truck outside of a neighborhood construction site? Do you think that people have been in a seven person orgy where there was a bottom that came in and everybody took turns fucking that bottom, and then there were straight guys jacking off on the left side? Somebody is getting sucked. I was getting sucked off by the bottom. Oh, he's getting Focht Have you done that? Not yet. Have you done Nutella?

Jim: 54:39

This Friday, this Friday? Well, but have you ever Nutella? Why would have you ever

Bobby: 54:45

jerked off in the sauna? Yes. And you came

Jim: 54:48

not in the sauna, but outside in the showers. Oh, no. I'm here in Columbus.

Bobby: 54:55

And that's fine. I mean, it's LA Fitness Bay, which are called LA Fitness anymore.

Jim: 54:59

They're like eSports so students boy figure it out. Here's the thing you're looking at right now you're comparing two straight people. I'm saying as a gaming as a gay Oh, even as it get no, no, absolutely not. You might be on par with average, but I don't think you're more experiment. I mean,

Bobby: 55:17

I mean, you know what, I'm into delivery porn. I'm, I mean really like, Do you know what I'm saying? And you know, such as like, delivery pirate

Jim: 55:30

stuff like that. Literally that's what I hear. Okay. Okay. I do feel like overall we are both more experimental. Absolutely.

Bobby: 55:40

And I think that's fair. I think that's you. I think I have faded with time and I think you have accelerated time now.

Jim: 55:46

You either you did Yahoo chat you were Craig's I was webcaming people I have I did pics on the fucking saved on my phone. I have your dick.

Bobby: 55:55

I have another I have another I want to see oh, no, you're not why? Because I didn't know what happening but Oh, where like I was being I was on Yahoo chats and my faces in it and everything. It doesn't look good. I look really fat and have a beard on. I was so hot. That is so out there somewhere. It has my old fake name, but not the same one that you think

Jim: 56:15

meanwhile I'm sitting like floppy disk videos to you. You're like you have full jerk off. It's online. I have your more experimental fine.

Bobby: 56:22

I'm serious. Like I'm serious. Question. I've sucked off a cowboy. Okay. sucked off a cowboy. I did.

Jim: 56:30

Let's turn that. Oh, that's so hot. I want you to describe your sex life with a song title.

Bobby: 56:39

It's been a while since I

Unknown: 56:44

got hold my

Bobby: 56:46

head up. Ha. And it's been a while since I said I'm sorry. Or whatever. Uh huh. That's the one that comes to mind.

Jim: 56:55

Wow,

Bobby: 56:56

what's an offense you've committed that could get you fired from work?

Jim: 57:01

There's too many.

Bobby: 57:03

Have you ever dropped off at work? Ever in your lifetime? Not necessarily like your current job.

Jim: 57:08

I was like, I don't want to get fired for my current job. No, like no apps. I've

Bobby: 57:12

never. I've never done it at my current job either. Like I don't have time for that. But I do. Oh, yeah. You sit in that bathroom. You're not thinking about all your coworker. Oh,

Jim: 57:20

I have jerk. Oh my god, you bitch. You don't know who I'm jerking off to keep it a secret. But it is people. Yes. There are people like what if they hear me? And that's even more of a turn on. So yeah, no, there's been at least I can think of like three jobs where I've jerked off while at work.

Bobby: 57:41

Same. Now. It's like your most offensive thing though. No,

Jim: 57:44

no, the more fire because that's in private. Like they can't they can't fire you for jerking off in the bathroom. Like they literally can't. They can't know it's a private space if they're recording you in the bathroom so they can get fired. cercato Now, if you're in the break room with everyone walks in Yeah, you can't fire but if you're like in a bathroom, that's your shirt off in the bathroom. I jerk off all the time in the bathroom. Interesting. Now, not at my current job right now. Okay, now then. Every time we go to the bathroom and really Hurry up in there.

Bobby: 58:12

Yeah. Are you jerking off? Like you pulled the potty? You got to actually pesan get off the pot.

Jim: 58:17

I did accidentally show not my own thank God, but someone else's nudes on my phone to people at work when I was typing through vacation photos. Oh yeah, that's awkward. I hate that. And I was like, Dude, you we were at the beach. And then this is how the house looked. And this is how the icoc this? No, no, it wasn't mine. But it was like someone had sent me one. And I was like, and this is a picture of the kitchen. This is Pedro deck. And I was like, oh, fuck, and then he went to the next one. It was all wiped, right? No think it was just one. So I was very quick about I was like so. And then they were like, you should see our phones. We have dick pics. Oh, everyone has nudes in

Bobby: 58:56

their phone. I think straight people are really actually coming on their shelves. I really do feel I do. I do. What's a woman? How do you define a woman? No, not Tozando straight people. Okay, no, but like a lot of like, progressive and like, yeah, forward thinking straight people. They're like, they actually kind of like, I mean, they're like, very like the guys are very, like, open.

Jim: 59:14

They're getting better. I would say they're getting better wouldn't be like, Oh, they're great. No, I

Bobby: 59:17

don't think a great but like I think the average is higher now that people are more like, like they're willing to kind of give you shit on purpose to kind of like get you riled up like It's like hot for us. And they just know, they're fucking around.

Jim: 59:27

I'd hang up on a straight friend this week or talking about something. We're talking about pronouns. And I hang up on him because if he wasn't following, and then I found no, because he was being a dick on purpose. And then I didn't realize it. And then I thought we were arguing for real and I was like, rather than Scott do rather than say something I would regret.

Bobby: 59:45

Okay, well, I mean, and that's another episode of not well, we're going to Austin on the 27th through the first but we're leaving on the first in the morning. So

Unknown: 59:54

what's that first?

Jim: 59:55

Oh, but But listen, but listen, we're gonna hurry days has September, April. June and November. So April Okay, so, so we will on the 30th of April, we will be out until the wee hours of May 1, because we don't have our flights on early. It's like 9am. So like, usually if we're gonna be out we're gonna be out at the cowboy gay bar I'm bringing. I'm bringing

Bobby: 1:00:18

microphones like and we're going to St. Austin.

Jim: 1:00:22

Why not?

Bobby: 1:00:23

I don't know why. I'm always so scared. We don't know anybody. Nobody else is here. They live in Texas. Like,

Jim: 1:00:27

I don't even know what a microphone is. It'll

Bobby: 1:00:29

be fine. You're gonna I can't wait to follow with Austin though. It's gonna be bad. It's gonna be really bad. It's like

Jim: 1:00:34

saying that and you've never been there. I've been there. When one time okay, my dad used to live there. See your regular Okay, no, I've

Bobby: 1:00:41

been one time with my partner and now this will be different and I was at a conference. I'm like, so it's like a doctor conference so we look behave. Oh, fuck. See we're going there to get on with are going there. Reinder gay we're trying to get in with with the local gays want to find out your local watering holes. Oh my god. We're going to give you some

Jim: 1:00:57

just the tips. I'm going to come on my face and Austin. I'm just gonna say nice way to come to your hotel in Austin. Like oh, come to the Western Bay. Absolutely. It's a Western. It's downtown. It's right off. Southtown he'll come in the lobby and ride you off.

Bobby: 1:01:09

I will ride you ride you and ride you up. I won't ride my goal for Austin would be a big circle jerk. I would love that. Yeah, like I want like multiple men in my room at once like business people to this man

Jim: 1:01:22

if we weren't if we didn't lock eyes would I be allowed in the room? Yeah, if there was something freak nasty really happening like for other people? Yeah, I would let you watch isn't where I grew up watching where it's like jerking. I'm just looking at Dick's. Yeah, like, Okay, I think in a fair, I like that. Yeah, like I set some boundaries, but like, it could be okay. No,

Bobby: 1:01:40

if there was a lot going on, then we wouldn't have to be us. We actually would probably be like, yeah, we'd be like such Broly like straight guys in the back Eiffel Tower in a girl in high school. We like the straight of the gays. Yeah, we are and fuck them.

Jim: 1:01:53

Honestly, if I'm pulling sevens you can pull a six.

Bobby: 1:01:57

Honey up I am a seven Wait, I want a solid

Jim: 1:02:02

what city in Minneapolis you are well in any of the Midwestern states know exactly that's the thing is in Midwestern states we are in Atlanta I'm pretty hot it's really bad because in Atlanta how in New York City or LA actually in LA we I was here we're alive. That's what I'm saying. You're right actually we're actually like really hot.

Bobby: 1:02:21

Oh my god. We went from being angry to being narcissistic. And just like that, look how happy we are. We're so hot. We're so young. We're so hip. Where you know

Jim: 1:02:32

I'm not actually a fan I'm not I don't want to hear Yeah, come see

Bobby: 1:02:35

us in Austin like we'll get a more of a schedule kind of together cuz I do want to do an episode there cuz always fun to record our city. We are doing an episode Yeah. And um, but I want to like almost like find somebody to come up to the room with us and like have an interview like I really want to like grab like, well swift like figure that situation out like II think we can have a pink duck contest. The best pink in the South.

Jim: 1:02:57

I don't have a brown dick. Cuz you have a brown. Oh, you're

Bobby: 1:02:59

gonna get brown. Brown. You're in. You're brand new.

Jim: 1:03:01

I'm gonna get uncut brown day. It's really weird though. Because it's very uncut brown deck. Now.

Bobby: 1:03:06

It's like if a bunch of dudes from Chicago in the Midwest. Oh, no. It's like, no,

Jim: 1:03:12

it's like get that in Chicago. It's kind of like Do you remember Oh, no.

Bobby: 1:03:18

I didn't feel it was very Spanish. Or Latin X or whatever. Mexican now it's very homeless there. Nope, like super flat. Are

Jim: 1:03:27

we on the West Coast? No.

Bobby: 1:03:28

Oh, it's so bad. Oh, Austin Yeah, they they're so liberal there though. Because they pass laws like they can send the exit ramps Oh, yeah. No, no, no, we're we're saying usually the homeless say on the east side.

Jim: 1:03:42

There's like a shelter entirety you go into cities where all the homeless live.

Bobby: 1:03:45

Well then stop when cities in America

Jim: 1:03:49

but they don't live really here in Columbus like if you notice, well,

Bobby: 1:03:54

just saying, Well, when you're the most jolly state when you're the most cloudy city I want to live here not even the homeless want to live sometimes its advantages to being very clear and very cloudy. Less homeless

Jim: 1:04:06

and oh my god. Fuck me. Oh, no. Okay,

Bobby: 1:04:12

I thought we signed off like our jet. I'm just trying to make sure we have everything in do we know?

Unknown: 1:04:17

We do. Relax. Okay, so we

Bobby: 1:04:21

will see you next week. Then we'll see you next week, baby, baby. We'll see you next week. Bye. I'm drawn