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April 21, 2021

I Just Laid On The Ground With A Bike On Top Of Me (Reality star comes out, Bathroom habits, Bike accident in Central Park, Aliens)

I Just Laid On The Ground With A Bike On Top Of Me (Reality star comes out, Bathroom habits, Bike accident in Central Park, Aliens)

Happy Wednesday! This week on She's Not Doing So Well, Bobby, Miz & Jim are feeling very refreshed. Bobby got his hands on a Netflix exclusive preview of the gay reality show featuring Gus Kenworthy as a gay guide to Colton Underwood being filmed now. He also talks about people in his office not knowing how to check after themselves when they go to the bathroom. Miz had a WILD RIDE through central park at 2am after "52 Corona bottles". Jim tells us about aliens which then spins Bobby out of control again. All this and more!

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Transcript
Bobby:

I was just hooked up with this guy who had a trail of cat piss in his place. And

Unknown:

I stepped over

Bobby:

it. That wasn't the red flag that made me leave. We get to his bedroom. He's playing music on the TV. Weird, right? And eventually there's an ad.

Unknown:

He didn't even get the premium subscription. I'm worth. I'm worth Spotify Premium. Okay, I left. Welcome to She's

Bobby:

Not Doing So Well. Comedy podcast featuring Bobby. I don't want to be viral. I want to be inspirational and life changing. Because Listen, I'm edgy.

Jim:

Jim, Tom, what can I say? Finally he's just like, you can unfollow me if you don't like my body.

Unknown:

The mess but my god told me all about it. You're

The Miz:

right, but you look at mushroom shape.

Bobby:

Like I feel like this is gonna be a rough one for me, guys. Oh, haha. Hard. 10 but I already took one.

Unknown:

Oh, in afternoon. Yeah.

Bobby:

You guys wanna get started? Oh. Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of She's Not Doing So. Well. I'm

Unknown:

Bobby. I am Jean.

Bobby:

And welcome to another episode.

Jim:

I wasn't expecting that. I was like, you'll do a normal. No, I'm

Bobby:

trying to throw you off every time now crazy.

Jim:

Notice how you've never once throw me off and never throw you off fit. You could never if you tried. Happy Wednesday. Welcome to the show. Happy Wednesday.

Bobby:

Okay, so I'm sure you heard the news of Colton Underwood coming out of the closet. Right.

Jim:

Thank God. Listen, we first of all, first of

Bobby:

all, we all knew. I mean, if you go look back at them

Jim:

a good Christian man. I'm a virgin. I'm like, No, honey, that's not a thing.

Bobby:

I mean, it's pretty incredible. Because when you look at the season, you're like, you are so fucking gay.

Jim:

Now, how did that end up? Did he marry one of them? Like always? No. He

Bobby:

like went psycho because he thought that was his last chance being straight that like the girl got a restraining order on him. He Like

Unknown:

what? Yeah, it was bad. Oh, what?

Bobby:

I'm not really sure.

Jim:

What our restraining order. Yeah. So so he's a creeper too. He

Bobby:

Yeah, like so. I don't know if he was like just discovering himself or whatever. Yeah, we'll

Jim:

give them a break.

Bobby:

So I said to my mom, I said, cuz she loves the bachelor and Bachelorette series. So I was like, I could have told you that Colton Underwood was gay blah, ha. And if I just said to my mom, haha, like trying to be like coy and and whatever. And she goes, lol You have a good gaydar? And I was like, not really. But no one is a virgin at 26. Sorry, but also was he a football player? My mom said yes. Not sure for how long made me happy to see him come out. And maybe extra happy for you. I'm like, do you think I have a chance? Like she's like, oh, you're going on The Bachelor gay edition Bobby.

Jim:

Yeah, they think we're all the same.

Bobby:

I go. Oh, yeah. I mean, he's hot. So we will take them on our team. I can't wait until it's a non issue. My mom said lol he is hot. I know baby. So Wow. So that brings me to another thing AP so he came out everybody's like so super excited and happy. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Jim:

My gay boss texted me about it.

Bobby:

Yeah, like oh my god. It's like Okay. Then it was announced this like right after his interview exclusive with ABC morning with Robin where the fuck her name is? lesbian, a lesbian. Oh, and by the way, he's going to be coming out series on Netflix. And guess who? His little gay Fairy Godmother and crassly you would think no, Gus Kenworthy. Okay, Gus says hi, nobody's dumb as fuck. So I'm so I actually got my hands on the exclusive Netflix preview. That's gonna be out next week. You're gonna hear it first. Coming soon to Netflix.

Unknown:

What's good bitch

Bobby:

about being because I haven't seen one. That hurts. Because when I hear that, I believe it's the gas show. You know?

Unknown:

I definitely was like in the gym twice a day. My diet, especially for the week right before this shoot was really really strict. Like, no salt, no sugar, and I was like, Oh my god, where am I? But also I'm here for it. And I'm like saying it's about coming out. I can list a bunch of different things, but they'd all be excuses. I'm gay. that play was gay. And you're gay.

Bobby:

Fairy Godmother is Gus Kenworthy.

Unknown:

Kill me. You're I am. Yeah, I'm a miracle.

Bobby:

You're welcome. questions will be answered. Yeah. They'll talk about Grindr.

Unknown:

You can't do like what a typical dating app does which is which in my opinion is great. Then not go too big, not go too small. I've had sort of a range and I hate to call it a red flag. But I mean I was I was 100% nude. I'm, I'm actually nude right now. Yeah, no fats no fems no Asians,

Jim:

no black might have made your life harder for you. Sorry, I like can't stop moving.

Bobby:

What will Colton do when he has his first kiss? Can't creep on them? What will Colton do when he has his first angel? No wonder I held it in. Well, he liked it when things are stuck up his butt.

Unknown:

put my finger on what it was until high school my freshman year, find out this. Think about poses you can do to kind of like, hide yourself and like think of creative ways to hide yourself and more. That means the world to me. I wanna swing from the chandelier around the shed in a

Bobby:

limited series.

Unknown:

Your bitch you've never seen Game of Thrones was dark and bad. Coming soon on Netflix. still nervous. But so it's hard to kind of be dominant

Jim:

baggage or red flag or skeletons in the closet.

Unknown:

I don't really have planned that I said I thought there was a CA concert in town. So I just walked down from my house. And so now I'm just like stuck talking to all sorts of two

Jim:

straight men who are basically the same literally the same and look the same. to like, guide each other around like I can't. Like this is not interesting. Yeah. This is so uninteresting. So

Bobby:

that's why I made like, like I found that whiteness like gayest. I look straightest mask like weird, right?

Jim:

They're both trying to be met. I

Bobby:

can't I'm like Gus Kenworthy is going to be the one that's going to show him the gateway. It's like, No, do you know what a lot of us had to go through? Like, we didn't have a gay fucking person that guided us. We had to find out

Jim:

to get a gold medal in the Olympics, honey.

Bobby:

Yeah, I don't know. I don't think he did either.

Jim:

We'll probably like maybe bronze. I don't remember. I think it was silver.

Bobby:

He's gotten a medal. It was silver when he was straight. I think it was bronze when he was gay. So downgrade. Yeah, of course cuz he's gay.

Jim:

Oh, so the judges knew the judges were like, fuck this

Bobby:

little faggot this little queer. So anyway, I just thought that was fucking mind blown. Because also Billy Eichner, like predicted this. I don't know if you saw the clip. So he was on like an episode of The Bachelor. Like something him and Colton. Were sitting there with the host and he goes, you know where it's at. You could be the first gay bachelor. And Colton was like, so like Billy Eichner, like basically like that was two years ago, probably jerked him off and the offset like probably but I'm thinking why didn't Billy Eichner be his gay like guy? Why is it Gus Kenworthy? Who looks just like the Underwood dude. Like I can't eat us. What has us ever done other than adopt dogs from South Korea? Like I don't know. Any? No. He says no fats. No. fems Oh, absolutely. So anyway, I just wanted to start the show off with that. That's like my little like, fun fact of the week. But Gary, Gary, do you have any rebuttals from last week, boys?

Jim:

I don't. What?

The Miz:

Who's Gus Kenworthy?

Unknown:

Oh, sorry,

Jim:

skier. He's like an Olympic skier. Somebody

The Miz:

should No, no.

Unknown:

Well, really,

Bobby:

he was he's an Olympic skier he like came out. And he was the first ever athlete in the Olympics to come out or something. Well,

Jim:

not really, because there was like a diver from Great Britain. But anyways, in the United States, I

Bobby:

think, okay, that's probably true. But anyway, so he's like, this hot guy. So he was gay. And he's like, Oh, my God, he's so mad. Oh, ha.

Jim:

for ESPN, and that was hot. Like, like, he's

Unknown:

hot. Like, don't

Jim:

get me wrong.

Bobby:

But like you see in a resume, he's like, yeah, and then like, now he's like, girlfriend says hunty. Yeah. So I'm like, Oh, is this where we're going with this like that? Is that like he was selected? Yep. Can you see earlier interviews even like three years ago, I was like, Hey, you know, like, acting like himself. And now it's like Gaga. Yes. Tt Tata?

Unknown:

Nah, let's throw a cake key.

Bobby:

It's like I can't. So anyway, that's why I was pitching and that's why I brought it up. Because it's like, there's so many other Billy Porter could have been his gig. Right? You imagine Billy Porter, like put him in a South African player

Jim:

in history? Who has lived through shit? Yeah, I need to go down that hole like Gus like he goes skiing every week. I'm sorry. What life experience are we dealing with? Oh, I came out to I was popular.

Bobby:

Right? I'm a popular gay though. Tie. Cool. It's like he's like oh, you're gonna be me one day. Yeah. Anyway, I'm gonna give me

Jim:

I just I'm I'm grossed out by it. And Miss doesn't know who this is. I don't think he knows who either people are

The Miz:

I know not know until he came out who Colton Underwood was

Jim:

to be fair, I

Bobby:

they're both hot as fuck. I'm sorry. I would love to see on only fans. Oh, maybe that'll be the end of the documentary. Like check us out on only fans.

Jim:

Oh, I would stop you just dad. Oh my god. Yeah, that's

Bobby:

a hot combo. But they kind of look like it's kind of weird. Like, it's like, are they brothers?

Jim:

We don't know. We have friends who are basically dating themselves. So

Bobby:

I don't know what that means. I don't know.

Unknown:

All right. All right.

Bobby:

mizzi.

Jim:

Are you awake? are you beating yourself? Okay.

The Miz:

I'm just looking at who these people are

Bobby:

okay. Yeah, guys, what are these hot like? Like v they're hot like in cold underwear. He's

Jim:

not Latinx so don't get too excited. Ms.

Bobby:

No, he's typical white Midwest. Yeah, it's nothing you're gonna he's basic.

Unknown:

It's basic guys like him anyway. I guess. Do you ever? Oh, I did not

Jim:

what rebuttal do we need?

Bobby:

So what I'm doing is I want to give us an opportunity to if you listen to last week's episode or you thought about something later to be able to say like, Hey, I thought about it and XYZ.

Unknown:

Okay,

Bobby:

I don't even remember last week.

Jim:

Honestly, I texted you the funniest part to me.

Bobby:

It was it was good. I actually liked it. I actually liked the conversation.

Jim:

Let me just find that line because I think it's funny. And I was reading that fucking killed me.

Bobby:

That was only part of that episode.

Jim:

Why? Curious, George. Did you have a tail? was never there. Are you freaking out? Moving on? That was the funniest part of the episode to me. Like was never there. Are you freaking out? Moving on? I was like, Oh, yeah, I was.

Bobby:

Freaking I was glitching.

The Miz:

For the record, no one was freaking out. Yeah, I

Bobby:

mean, I guess I will apologize for the long audio book. But sorry. That's all I have to

Jim:

say. Don't worry. I didn't listen to it. When I listen to the EPS. I figure.

Bobby:

I figured people would skip it. I worked so hard on those things. And it just like never gets used. Really? That's okay. Well,

Jim:

it's par for the course.

Unknown:

Coming to my gut crawl weekly. Oh,

Bobby:

so many things I could talk about.

Unknown:

Okay, there we go. Perfect.

Bobby:

I don't know though. I'm kind of nervous. Like he doesn't remember.

The Miz:

Your mind.

Bobby:

I got my second. All the way off. Oh,

Unknown:

my God. Oh, something funny. Yes.

Jim:

That's the perfect rebuttal. This is gonna blow your mind. Blow Your Mind. Make sure when you talk to your friends.

Bobby:

I'm gonna read what I wrote down. I wrote some things

Unknown:

for rice stir rice.

Bobby:

This is something I wrote. Um, this is I'm just gonna go over this. Bobby loves milk.

The Miz:

You're a psychopath. Why?

Unknown:

Yeah, I

Bobby:

can drink milk like the I could drink.

Jim:

You like now? mucus cow mucus.

Unknown:

Wait. Ill

Jim:

it's just mucus. Well, that's

Bobby:

what milk is. Right?

Jim:

Yeah. mucus cleanse. Make it it's nasty. Yeah, I just

The Miz:

don't understand how people can sit down and have a glass of milk. I think it's so odd. Now.

Jim:

It tastes good when you grow up on it and your mom makes you drink a glass a day. I mean, I could drain you to like drinking a glass

Bobby:

as a kid every day rounds tumbler of like, at night like yes, it was great.

Jim:

I can we it's sugary and sweet. It's good. It's not too relative.

Bobby:

I haven't broke a bone.

Jim:

That's actually true. There's a lot of calcium in it.

Bobby:

It is I'm fat

Unknown:

cows chef. So

Bobby:

that's one of the things I wrote down. That's a nice way of putting it I have a I have a little issue with people in public restrooms. Oh my god. Why? My mouth there's like

Jim:

are these just random thoughts when you were high that you typed in here? Yeah, so

Bobby:

here's

Unknown:

what I remember. back to when I like I don't

Bobby:

bathrooms. No, but let me say this. I'm really bareback

Unknown:

in Europe. I'm really doing it raw dog in you. I like milk. There's a blow your mind I learned

Jim:

he's so high. He can't I'm looking at him. His mouth is dry His eyes are wide mouth is dry.

Unknown:

Drying marijuana. marijuana.

Bobby:

So here's what I wrote looking behind you after you drop the heat. Like why are we not cleaning up after ourselves? Now?

Jim:

Why are people flush in my

Unknown:

office?

Jim:

Yeah, when people don't flush I'm like what the fuck like wanting in there leaving piss everywhere like do not look like here's the thing let's look at the toilet after you do your I

Bobby:

wipe the toilet after I do anything. I will

Jim:

wipe it every time shit everywhere. I don't

Unknown:

know

Bobby:

I just I just common courtesy. I feel like it's but some people they'll have last crumbs just sitting on the little like I

The Miz:

get a fucking mop in here.

Unknown:

Can I just destroyed your bathroom? Come on. Give it a few minutes. It was like it when I found this.

Bobby:

You hear that sound? Sounds like a robot.

Unknown:

noise.

Bobby:

I felt like it was but I'm like

Unknown:

okay.

Jim:

I feel like we turned barbacking into you know what really grinds my gears?

Unknown:

grinds my

Jim:

gears milk?

Bobby:

No like, think about that does do you when you go to the bathroom, I need to turn around you need to like clean up your area make sure you don't leave any fucking anything behind now. Yeah, you cannot flush the goddamn toilet.

Jim:

If you even log in the toilet like you need to go to hell, you're going to hell like with little. You're going down the pole and what really pisses me off is when I have to take a real fucking bad drop a dump

Unknown:

and Joppa dump anything. Believe I just heard that the rapid down drop it was one

The Miz:

of the worst things I've ever heard in my entire life from

Jim:

drop drop a huge load.

Bobby:

Yeah. And so you get in the bathroom, and somebody's already sitting there. They're sitting there. There's toilet paper everywhere. Like they did not know how to use the whole entire roll. And it's clogged. So then I have to go get a monitor to fucking punch your shit.

Unknown:

Yes, this happens in your office though. Yeah. A single person.

Bobby:

It's one person that does it and I think I know who

Jim:

that's fucking disgusting way right share the base like, so not even a public restroom. Like I work with these people. Oh,

Bobby:

he wants to fuck He's like, leave me trails.

Jim:

trails. Hannah.

Bobby:

I wanted you to know, I'm clear.

Jim:

This rectum is up

Unknown:

on the toilet. So yeah,

Bobby:

I just wanted to bring that up. I

The Miz:

completely agree. I think that's

Bobby:

fine. And like, don't look backwards and you do that, like where where are you from? Right. Like,

The Miz:

I'm almost like, I don't even like know why this even needs to come up. Right? I would not expect it to be encountered ever.

Bobby:

It's disgusting. Another thing I wrote down was imposter syndrome. you've ever heard of that?

The Miz:

I have heard of that.

Bobby:

A lot of people are going through it right now. I know. Because of COVID ending like I feel like I'm gonna have it hardcore. Where you don't remember your you're not Yeah, you don't feel right. Like you feel like you're fake. You feel like you're faking it like like, you walk into a bar and you're like, Oh, hey, like nothing feels natural. It's like very Oh my God, I had that. Yeah, like it's fucked up. And so, imposter syndrome is something people are talking about.

Unknown:

How is this a thing people are talking about? But imposter syndrome asking Have you ever felt

The Miz:

that way before your mind is imposter syndrome and that others are discussing it?

Bobby:

And I'm really struggling I told you is gonna be a struggle. I even have an

Jim:

imposter. I didn't even have a fact until the hide minutes ago. It's fine, honey,

Bobby:

but you're an imposter.

Jim:

Yeah, I feel like this podcast is an imposter. Right? We're an imposter in the podcast.

Unknown:

I haven't really felt

The Miz:

that way. And like the limited things I've been able to do like in New York, right? Like going out to a restaurant you talk about? So maybe, but maybe one is more back to how it was? It might feel differently? I don't know. Yeah,

Bobby:

I don't know. It's very interesting. Like, have you ever felt as a comedian on stage? Like, who the fuck am I standing here trying to make you laugh? Like,

The Miz:

yeah, I felt that way all the time. So that's Oscar syndrome was like you once knew. And then once you go back to it,

Bobby:

or it's like, have you heard the term like, fake it till you make it? So like, Yeah, sometimes people like faking it all the time. Right? So like, then like, you're like, Okay, I'm gonna strap my stuff like in my model, but you're like faking it. So you're not really real. So you have this like, feeling of just like, yeah, I'm an imposter. So thank you.

Jim:

Actually, like when people are also made to feel that they don't belong in the position they're in so

Bobby:

right so like, a boss. Yeah, Boss

Jim:

role, like, You're not supposed to be a boss. Right? So that's when they internalize that and think, well, I'm doing like, Who

Bobby:

the fuck am I like?

Unknown:

Yeah, I'm

Bobby:

not good enough to be here. Like, how did I do this? Yeah, right.

The Miz:

Yeah, I feel that way. But really, it's like it's a real it's not like a syndrome. It's something like you

Jim:

just actually so it's just part of

The Miz:

not meant

Jim:

you're just not good at what you do. Right? Yeah. So right. Well, that's probably true

Unknown:

is the imposter. imposter syndrome.

Bobby:

Yeah, it's kind of weird. Like you and then I

Jim:

don't know that's what we have miserable with Ms. Because he's an imposter.

Bobby:

And he's miserable. Maybe. But I think we're all imposters. Oh, I am right now like to like agree like Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of She's Not Doing So Well. It's like no, like, Who am I what the God is.

Jim:

He is a gay imposter.

Bobby:

And you know what, it really sucks cuz he's gonna make Colton stick. Right.

Jim:

And that's not fair. Cuz I should be doing it.

Bobby:

My mom said she was excited for me. Yeah, but which was really awkward. A

Jim:

random gay person you'll never meet

Bobby:

but also Can I just make a comment on that? I meant to say it earlier. Like, props to my mom. I've never had that honest. I'm a gay conversation like, No, seriously like she's never she's never said like Like if I said that somebody was hot, she'd be like Bobby, or like not just ignore it and kind of like go around it. Or like, Oh, I could have told you that he was gay. She would have been like, Oh yeah, but she like really got

Jim:

into it was like she's like I want you to get plowed by this guy. She's

Bobby:

like, I'm really happy for you. I'm like, dang, he's hot. We'll take them. She's like, Oh, yeah, it's very it was a very interesting conversation growing Yeah, so anyway, that that was a big thing. So but that's about it for me. I feel like a fucking total fake imposter.

Jim:

I would with that list of things. I do too.

Bobby:

And there's there's another thing on there too that I've been pretty. Just.

Unknown:

It's not funny though.

Jim:

I don't get it. We'll make it funny. Dress will tear you apart,

Bobby:

realizes he's a fixer and tries to referee too much instead of not giving a fuck and doing what's best for him.

The Miz:

What point of view are you speaking from?

Unknown:

He was he?

Bobby:

I guess that would be me.

Jim:

Realizing I'm a faker.

The Miz:

I'm Big Sur and he says

Bobby:

no, like I kind of look him in my head. When I'm planning this. I go Bobby was XYZ Bobby is XYZ.

The Miz:

Bobby was drinking milk and LinkedIn. I like milk

Unknown:

I am. He really likes me and I realized that my referee, Bobby heard people talking about imposter syndrome.

Bobby:

Yeah, and actually, imposter syndrome is kind of like what I am. I'm a fucking fake. Oh my god. I'm a fake.

Unknown:

Well, this Justin, we're all we're all fake. So

Bobby:

am I I'm a fake.

Jim:

I've been faking it till I make it since leaving the womb like but that's

Bobby:

also part of like, the universe like you're supposed to kind of like put it out there that you are that like actually do. Yeah, like when you're on stage. mm is like, Girl I love what he's doing. Stand up.

Unknown:

I do too.

Bobby:

Are you getting turned on? kinda kinda makes me want to. I want them to finger me onstage.

Jim:

I would like blow I blow him from below stage like looking up at the mic. Stand and people are just watching like I would love that. Yeah.

Bobby:

Principle stand or like the

Unknown:

podium

Bobby:

podium. Yeah, you're under the podium going on? Nobody can see you and the podium is like

Jim:

such an impasse. Just like manifesting what's gonna happen in June. Wow, John's

Unknown:

gonna

The Miz:

get a president stand stand. I know I heard that one. Stand

Unknown:

stand he just

The Miz:

I think I just do it and I think that I knew until it was a highlighted concept.

Bobby:

I think it'd be really funny if you dress

The Miz:

maybe I should but right then and there I had like stopped my

Bobby:

time. Yeah, I can tell you where like concept. Oh, no. When you get and when you get more angry or when you get like into something.

Unknown:

Oh, is that right? Fucking family.

Bobby:

It's like okay, my mom.

Unknown:

cried baby.

Bobby:

It's so fucking damn dumb.

Unknown:

Did you record that piece? Yeah.

Bobby:

That's my voice. Am I just pitched

The Miz:

big helping them milk your left.

Bobby:

Milk. Oh, I

Unknown:

love it.

Bobby:

Are you ready? mizzi Yes.

The Miz:

Not really, to be honest, but that's fine.

Bobby:

What do you need like a little Kumbaya?

Unknown:

Okay, so what the fuck?

Jim:

I was doing the comedy or guns in my head. Got

Bobby:

you in that champion jacket. I just I know. It's

Jim:

It's literally blue and pink and white. And it's cute. Sorry. I know when I look good. And I do

Bobby:

you look like a lesbian. Sorry.

Unknown:

I sound like a lesbian. I'm

Jim:

a hot lesbian. I'm fine with it. No one said hottest the beard so lesbians don't have beards. So

Bobby:

why some of them? Why can't they? They can. Thank you.

Jim:

If it's a trans woman who didn't like Andrew hormone therapy, they could have a beard.

The Miz:

What if it's a girl that has a lot of facial hair,

Jim:

but to be a lesbian? You have to be a woman who likes women,

The Miz:

right? why it was a girl who had a lot of facial hair. I am fitting their arch and

Bobby:

right because like

Unknown:

To highlight that humans have actually answered the question definition.

The Miz:

And no one answering that or

Jim:

challenging as well as the fucking question. I didn't, all I heard was and

The Miz:

the question was, what if there's a girl who grows out of facial hair that's a lesbian.

Jim:

There actually is a girl like that, but I don't think she's a lesbian, but she is Sikh. And she doesn't cut her hair, her religion and Sikhism

Bobby:

so she has like a beard. You know,

Jim:

if people were to have to wear turbans, like men who were Yeah, like a lot of them are Sikh. Some of them are Hindu too, but Sikhism is Sikhism is pretty cool. It's like focused on service to others. They kind of believe in respect all Gods but they just don't have any forms. Yeah, they don't believe in cutting their hair. It's part of their life. Imagine their pubes.

Bobby:

Okay, I

The Miz:

had a roommate when I lived at NYU when I interned at Warner Music Group, and namedrop kind of his hair ever in the shower. Every morning was like a shit ton of hair. Loaded

Bobby:

Yeah, yeah. Key imagine his pride dangling all from his balls in his asshole.

Unknown:

It's bad.

The Miz:

Gross, but like

Jim:

I went straight to the

The Miz:

name of your religion, then I guess it's fine.

Unknown:

Right

Jim:

now like Jews don't cut their hair at the temples like, you know, they let it curl down. Like everyone has rules about hair. Literally. Almost all religions have some type of rule about the hair. It's just I mean, the Catholics only

Unknown:

have a role

The Miz:

to ask what the cap what's the conflict? One?

Jim:

More like Middle Eastern Eastern religions have a roll

Unknown:

some right. Alright, busy. Okay,

The Miz:

so I literally am dying. And I need to tell you why. Because I haven't been able to talk about it with you guys all day. And now I need to fucking tell you why. Okay, so last night, I like go to like a party. Right? And there it is, like,

Bobby:

not everyone. I'm going to ask questions as we go. What type? Sure What type of party?

The Miz:

It was a birthday party for a straight man and a whole bunch of other straight people. Okay, I would tell you only gay one there only gay in the room only in the room. Yeah, only. And so it's like old co workers that were there. And so one of them who I don't remember looking the way he did looked like like before we all left the office looked like amazing. And he's like three levels below me. And he like have grown his hair out. He's like humble ponytail in. And

Bobby:

you're like, guys what Sony's

The Miz:

like, I didn't know that. That was a thing. But I guess. And I was like obsessed with him. I like fawning all over him all night. Meanwhile, he's like married to a woman and is like Mormon. And I didn't even like

Bobby:

sister wife.

The Miz:

Because he was like, wait, I offered him a drink because I bought like a 52 bottles of Corona light. And I was like, Do you want one? And he's like, Oh, I don't drink. I'm Mormon.

Bobby:

And you're sober. You're like, what?

Jim:

sober?

The Miz:

I was like, wait, you haven't had a drink today? Or like ever, ever? Like why I come on mission. They having a drink today. Anyway, so it comes out. He lives outside. And so we're like, okay, let's leave together. And I'm like, Yes, like, let's do this. Then he's like, Oh, well, we can rent bikes. And I was like, excuse me? Oh,

Unknown:

my God.

The Miz:

You mean we're biking home at like 1am through Manhattan. And this is like on in Midtown ease, and

Bobby:

you've had 52 coronas.

The Miz:

And I've had like, 50 to five yesterday. This is like 1am and so were biking. And like I had just, it's a city bike program.

Bobby:

And like, are you like have like little stations. You're like, Oh, I ran from here to here.

The Miz:

Yeah, exactly. I don't know if you got to have them in Columbus.

Bobby:

We have city bikes. We do. Don't fucking come for us

Jim:

that stations aren't close enough together for me. But we do.

Unknown:

Okay.

Bobby:

If you live downtown closer you there would be Wow.

Unknown:

Wow.

The Miz:

Okay, so then we're on these bikes and I had just biked on a city bike like, a week ago. So I was like, feeling confident. I'm gonna like, I'm gonna fucking like own this. I'm gonna like body this. And so we're like biking. I'm like accelerating. I'm kind of crushing. Not gonna lie. And then we're like going through Central Park to like the 64th Street traverse which like goes from the east to the west. And I crash into the like wall of the tunnel. We're going like, totally on the ground with a bike on top of me like I just

Bobby:

are you.

The Miz:

Like me, and it's like, stop the Toronto I want to hear him flailing around. I

Bobby:

broke my arm but I'll suck it.

Jim:

I'm just gonna have to use my left hand better right now, but I mean seriously

The Miz:

was legitimately so embarrassing and then I like I was like, the bike was like on me and like, meanwhile, my arm and leg is like throbbing at that point in time and still today. And I was like, Yeah, Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. And then we just continue on the bike I'm afraid like literally not thinking Do you ride a bike we put like your legs out and like just call your guy I and then I just put it back at the nearest stop. I saw Mike Yeah, no, I'm going to recap now. And so you got to like the you got to the stall got straight plugged in. It was fine. I'm gonna get a cab. Because I'm dying. I would somehow got myself up the stairs, my arms throbbing. I take a bag of new balls out of the fridge, put it on my arm as like an ice. Such an Italian moment.

Bobby:

I grabbed a bag of meatballs.

Unknown:

meatballs, little mama sauce and put them on

The Miz:

my arm and I was I was laying in bed, like you know at the combination of chaos and you just like sit and you're just like shaking your head and like God. What the fuck just happened to me like why was I flailing around in the middle of a tunnel on Central Park with a bike on top of me trying to impress a straight Mormon?

Bobby:

Yeah, like

Jim:

cuz they're high that's the gay Yeah, the gay gene.

The Miz:

Right and so it's true. I actually I'm working with him. He followed me on instagram tonight so clearly

Unknown:

to go on I'm gonna get a cat I think I'm done here

The Miz:

Michael probably bleeding

Jim:

calling his wife Yeah, this is why we don't drink because of Jesus but because of this

Unknown:

is the path

The Miz:

so that's what happened to me last night and I'm not happy about it because Okay, so I can't really extend my arm all the way like what are our injuries at this point like wow, like I am okay if I can cut it straight ahead. And I can extend it but luckily like right out or like, put my arm down like now. Can we

Bobby:

see the side of your arm?

The Miz:

It looks fine right now. It looks kind of small compared to this arm a mini camera on a

Unknown:

you just slammed Kudlow

The Miz:

I literally slam like this is the wall like I was like I like swerving swimming.

Bobby:

And that's when you have to like find everything funny like shaking your skin hanging from your hand. Gonna get blood on his dick from

Unknown:

a handy fucking nose.

The Miz:

Other injuries my leg like really hurts. I was doing the peloton earlier and every time I like pedaled It was like out

Unknown:

so you need to be in rough

Bobby:

Yeah, but I know you don't know your doctors to see

Unknown:

the doctor.

The Miz:

I joined the doctor What does that mean? So you have

Unknown:

you're a doctor you fuck him and then he treats you well the right joined a doctor.

The Miz:

I joined this think like one one medical weightwatchers Medical it's like a network of like offices that you can like go do you pay 200 bucks a month and you get access. So I'm getting my first physical and like 11 years

Jim:

Don't you have health insurance?

Unknown:

Yeah.

Jim:

Well then why do you pay$200 to access because it's

The Miz:

just like a network and you're gonna have an on demand booking and no

Bobby:

I gotcha. Yeah, so it's like exclusivity

The Miz:

right I don't have like appointment with a doctor I gotta go online and book something. Well, that's good

Unknown:

luck and do that now Where can you do that?

Jim:

Literally I go into my chart it's called and I can make it whatever I want with my car. It's like your Yeah, okay. It's like probably what you probably what you have

Bobby:

like all the systems here are kind of my charted Yeah, like

Jim:

you have a my chart and it's like your medical history. The medications you're like, it's almost

Bobby:

like an online it's a chip.

Unknown:

shit what is

Bobby:

a chip in the matrix like what It's like, now there's What?

Unknown:

Oh my god,

Jim:

are you fucked up? Or what?

Unknown:

Is our unknown

Jim:

in the matrix like a center of information or Oh a program?

Bobby:

Yeah, a program. Okay.

Jim:

People are talking about programs.

Bobby:

I can't I'm sorry, I lost

The Miz:

my way kicking about imposter theory. So just er syndrome so

Jim:

just so you know with that that's out there. I'll leave you with that.

The Miz:

Ms rolls. Ms. That is miserables but I was gonna ask you guys how you guys want to die? Because last week we talked about I want to get buried. Yeah, you want to die?

Bobby:

Yeah. Okay, we're keeping that thing. I like that. I want to know how you want to live.

Unknown:

Oh,

Bobby:

Mom, I want to die. super old. Age.

Jim:

Yeah. But like so old. You can't move around. You know, honestly.

The Miz:

Like a vegetable.

Bobby:

I kind of wanted to lay you already are doing right. So imagine when I'm like 80

Unknown:

it's gonna be worse. So

The Miz:

basically, you want to live forever until you have to like, actually buy like you

Bobby:

don't. You don't want like something tragic.

Jim:

Like a 98 year old the other day who doesn't do anything at all? They can't get out of a chair or out of bed. Like do you think that sounds fun though? Oh, also she can't chew because her teeth don't work in her dentures. Don't say goodbye. She can't chew. So it's all liquid diet only. All the milk you wanted.

Bobby:

I will be able to survive.

Unknown:

I'm thriving look like I'm gonna be

Bobby:

having major anxiety about definitely.

Unknown:

Yeah, it's bad. Why? Yeah,

Jim:

I partner has that I realized early on. He goes the other day, I said something like, Oh, your parents won't die for a while. And he's like, I can't talk about it. I'm crying. I was like, why are you crying? I wasn't with him. So I was texting. Like, what do you mean, you're crying like sit down, it's okay. Your parents will die someday, like, they will die. He goes, he's like, I will not be able to handle it. I I'm like,

The Miz:

okay, like, that's why you start preparing now, honey.

Jim:

I know. But some people can't like, like Bobby, like,

The Miz:

okay, but then what you have to do is sit back and be like, Okay, this is how I feel right now, at this point in time. Imagine if I don't address this head on how it's all gonna come collapse

Jim:

when you get cancer. And that's gonna end in three months. Like, how are you gonna handle that? Bob, you're

The Miz:

good as an unknown in terms of timing. There's a known in terms of the event can like

Bobby:

I'm about to go off the deep motherfucking end to start

The Miz:

to recognize it now. You know?

Bobby:

Yeah. Sometimes I think that we're living in like, we're just watching or memorization. Sort of, like, I'm just watching what I was. I'm not what you've already lived.

Jim:

Yeah, so please explain that further.

Bobby:

I believe that I've already lived, watching. I'm like, delayed a little bit and just what you know, I'm saying no. Okay,

Jim:

so you feel like everything you're experiencing has already happened? Yeah. Okay. That's called deja vu. And it's a seizure in a certain part of the brain. Oh, so this is the Moreno

The Miz:

do you mean? Like conceptually, like you've lived once before? This has all happened? And now you're watching it?

Bobby:

Yeah. Like you. Like, you're kind of like, this is like your life flashing in front of you. Because as I get older, I noticed that like, things go faster. And like I just feel like one day it's gonna be like up like, you're just waiting for your death.

Jim:

Does that make sense? Oh, my God. Are you just Hi. And you feel this right now? Or do you feel Oh,

Bobby:

well, when I'm high, like the past two times, I was like, Oh, God, like this is? You can hear it in my voice. No, I just it's

Unknown:

like, it's gonna happen.

Bobby:

I know. Hon.

Unknown:

I know. I know. Doing it,

Bobby:

it's just like, well, that's 19 years old of natural causes. And I want us to be able to at least like talk you think I can lay that said,

Unknown:

I just want to get

Jim:

into low bar. I

Unknown:

don't want to know the night. You

Jim:

don't want to know the night You're like,

Bobby:

I don't know, like on Friday.

Unknown:

Oh, I'm gonna die. Well, that's I

Jim:

was gonna say like, I would prefer to I can't talk about anymore. I'm dying. I would just prefer to have a massive heart attack in my sleep and just not wake up. Like, that's easy.

Unknown:

That is easing. You know, like, you

Jim:

don't have to think about it. You're not like, Oh, my God, I'm dying. It's just like, right? Oh, I didn't I went to bed. I was fine. I fell asleep. And then I didn't wake up. Like,

Bobby:

that'd be great. But you don't get to have that realization of I

Jim:

don't need it because you're afraid of it. You don't want it. So

The Miz:

yeah, never wondering what it feels like. In that moment. Like, I this is how a death inducing thing happened to me.

Jim:

And yeah, well, some of the cool thing is this. I cannot I cannot like tell you the Tibetan Book of the Dead which your partner has and has not read yet, but it's very good. He should read it. talks about the process of death and what you go through in the different stages as you are consciousness dissolved. Yeah, yeah. And how it doesn't completely die and you pass on to new body but

Bobby:

oh my god, I can't swallow stuff.

Jim:

Oh no, but it's cool to think about like, like as your brain is losing oxygen like we've watched this DMT right you like get it releases flying it's probably fun trip and it's got to be a good feeling

The Miz:

like I'm not bad like nobody

Jim:

can be bad. It's probably like the highest you've ever felt can't like I really can't talk about you know that feeling of when you're about to pass out. You don't have any oxygen in your brain. Yeah, like it's probably that feeling but taking up a level. Okay, I

Bobby:

can't talk right. I'm serious, usually lower than this.

The Miz:

I really. I think my preferred is like a stray bullet in the middle of doing something that I like doing. Yes. We don't like like a restaurant and eating Mexican. Bam. Like it's done. Like, you

Jim:

know, it's over. Right? You don't think about it. In America.

Bobby:

We've got a really good chance. So

Jim:

right. Oh, yeah. Yesterday, I was like, oh, eight more people. Another shooting in Minneapolis. Like,

Bobby:

oh, like it's nothing. But we're concerned about the six people that died from the Johnson and Johnson right. We're

Jim:

like, pause everything. Mike,

Bobby:

how do we pause guns?

Unknown:

Can we pause?

The Miz:

I actually said that, like back when we were all obsessed with COVID back in March 2020. I was like, okay, like, why have we never had this sort of rally behind any other issue?

Jim:

Right? No, it's never important. And when I hear people say like, well, it's not the guns, it's people's mental illness.

Bobby:

I'm like, well, then they can, then Okay,

Jim:

so there are there isn't mental illness in the rest of the world. Like we're the only country with depression. Right? Well, not at these rates. I'm like, Okay, so then do you want to like extend health care to everyone should take care of

Unknown:

God, any mental health? Yeah, it's

Bobby:

a really.

Jim:

Okay. So you don't want that. But you want everyone to be able to buy assault rifles, and that's fine. And it's not that we're also the country with guns like per capita. It's insane. It's embarrassing number of guns people have. Everyone sucks.

Bobby:

It really is embarrassed. No

Jim:

one wants the right doesn't want to say like, oh, it could be the guns. They don't want to say it could be and you're like, No, I think it's the fact that you can literally walk into a Walmart, buy a Walmart, a Walmart or buy a weapon or and go shoot up all your former co workers like,

Bobby:

Did they ever say what it was? It was a

Jim:

it was an ex employee but like who knows like he he for the people he killed were actually seek there's a connection for you. And casting for me. So we'll just see. You're like, Did he attack them? Because

Bobby:

this is the first time I've ever heard this fucking thing. See,

Jim:

cuz Sikhism is cool.

Unknown:

It's true. I feel Yeah.

Jim:

I have some, like certain tenants to their lives. And one of them is they should be carrying a weapon to defend themselves in their faith at all times. And it's like, I think it's called upon. It's like a little knife.

Bobby:

It's curved. Oh, now they can carry those?

Jim:

No, because it's a religious thing. They don't use them to attack people. But it's like it right. Yeah. Between like a defender like

The Miz:

a knife and like a giant rife

Jim:

rifle with a magazine that you can kill? A second, right? Yeah,

The Miz:

like, come on.

Bobby:

It's bad.

The Miz:

This has been pretty miserable. Bobby, I really want to have a fireside chat with you about death.

Bobby:

So I really can't. When I'm high.

The Miz:

We need to have a death episode. We're always talking about death.

Bobby:

I feel like that's basically where the podcast is. We're like how are you gonna die? Who we're gonna kill like, Oh my God,

The Miz:

we were gonna kill an axe.

Jim:

I don't want it to be on on tape. Like,

Unknown:

Oh, yeah, yeah. doesn't

Jim:

like I don't need them to play this.

Unknown:

Like, Sure. Sure, sure.

Bobby:

All right. All right. Are you ready?

Jim:

Not really. I

Bobby:

have to look up that story about the I didn't read. What have you been doing this whole time? paying attention? Oh, okay, cuz um, you've been clicking away over there. So I thought you're actually getting your research ready, but now you're probably texting some dumb bitch. You're probably

Jim:

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm popular.

The Miz:

I'm sorry. I

Bobby:

haven't I swear. I'm gonna say it again. mediocre white snout two weeks in a row. What is a little hour of your time and total attention? I don't understand why it's so hard.

Jim:

Life in our planet. I have been looking up rihani but I don't cancel

Bobby:

a fucking you can't fake a faker. You can't get past a liar. Honey can't fix a fixer. You can't fix a fixer.

Jim:

He was a fixer.

Bobby:

He is a fake and I know a liar when I know a fucking liar. And that's all I'll say about

Jim:

is a liar

The Miz:

within Why didn't you know I was lying about Johnson and Johnson. Do you

Bobby:

know this? Have you listened to Mr. Potter? Yeah, I

The Miz:

guess I haven't explicitly told you. You're lying.

Unknown:

I did lie. It is so Welcome Shane he

The Miz:

I had an appointment to go get Pfizer on March 18. And it was like just not gonna happen for me because at that point it wasn't like age in New York you sold to prove that you had a condition so I had like open up all this paperwork to prove that asthma blah, blah. So and I'll do my IPO. So I was like, okay, like, I'm, I can't, so I cancel my appointment and I was like, but by the time the three week lapse, I will have gotten j&j. I will so that I'll still be done with the process.

Unknown:

Well,

The Miz:

then I got j&j exactly three weeks later, so I got my set my quote unquote second shot. Do you

Bobby:

remember the picture he posted on his stories?

The Miz:

No. I literally hanro or like Jeff either desses and j&j sticker back on.

Bobby:

Like, literally faked it so that nobody would know he was lying. Like he went to lengths on he, he went all the way.

Jim:

You couldn't take a jab at you got J and J. All you

Bobby:

could have said like, because I remember

Unknown:

the day he told people because you

Bobby:

are going to Rhode Island that night. And you were like, Oh, yeah, I got my shot. And my dad picked me up. I'm like,

Unknown:

right? Hi,

The Miz:

I told people and then you're like, Here's

Bobby:

my card. What?

Unknown:

Whoa, bro, what's your second shot? He's like Tell me second shot you inject

Bobby:

Little did we know that he got to the seventh blood clot and we would have never known

Jim:

he's ready to go

Bobby:

live on the wild side and I told you it's on brand so

Jim:

we're one in a million that got the

Bobby:

honest I think we are all of our shots like I'm Pfizer.

Jim:

Yeah, you're the first the best I'm a Madonna bitch like yeah your mudrunner bed just like I had all the side effects of my second

Bobby:

yeah you're definitely heavier I'm skinny Pfizer skinny like but Turner's like pretty in high school but like a little chunky now Not now.

Unknown:

Right and then there's

Jim:

the dirty bitch running into walls on a bike like

Bobby:

you slipped on moss like was like wet was a concrete Well, I

The Miz:

just lost control of it. I

Bobby:

how fast were you fucking going?

Unknown:

fast?

Jim:

Because you were like we got to get there. I gotta stop.

Bobby:

That's total j&j move totally total Jane. Oh, we're going smooth. Everything's great.

Jim:

Wall we've hit a wall. We just killed six wins. Holy.

The Miz:

I'm totally actly Exactly.

Unknown:

You know with Jim. Oh. Oh,

The Miz:

did you just destroy the toilet? The Bobby's got to go walk it. Yeah,

Jim:

yeah. Cuz Guess what? It's clogged. And I'm also your boss, so fuck me.

Bobby:

gusting

Jim:

that's doesn't it make you not want to fuck him though?

Bobby:

I don't really want to

Unknown:

you do know. For him now. Yeah, I

Bobby:

mean, that would be a situation for sure. Right? I don't want to see his asshole. Like, especially if

The Miz:

we know what capable of

Jim:

there's a lot of straight men that I would suck off but not touch their whole or getting your it right.

Bobby:

Like I made you heard about the people that didn't know that. You're supposed to wash your whole, like straight guys. There's one guy like he's a straight 21 year old. Yes. Those on Tick Tock. And he's like, but you wash your whole and he was being dead serious. And she was like,

Unknown:

Are you kidding me? It's disgusting. Right? Like, why would you not wash your home? Right like it's part of your body? I

Jim:

fingers every time around? Yeah, I'm like, yeah, to clean this out. Because I don't want

Bobby:

any bacteria

Jim:

anything if I'm gonna get eaten out like I'm not right. Giving them E. coli.

Bobby:

So right? Yeah. Wow. Well,

Jim:

this is horrifying. Great start. Great start. Okay, well, we were doing two things. And the more you know, oh, and this is kind of a continuation of what we've been talking about the Lee

Bobby:

life death and where we go after life death and where we come to life death and where we go after the podcast that lets you think about your death.

Unknown:

Oh my god, sorry, I'm

Bobby:

interrupting.

Jim:

And you're you are

Unknown:

but that's okay. You know what you are. Okay,

Jim:

so I guess what I wondering and what I wonder about a lot it and maybe other people probably don't give a fuck or wonder it ever but people are talking about could there be life outside of her

The Miz:

other people talking about the podcast.

Jim:

people other than this podcast are wondering Kanal life outside of our outside of our planet, or our galaxy or our

Unknown:

solar system. I don't know like

Jim:

how far do you want to extend it? But yeah, have you ever thought about could there be life on other planets?

Unknown:

Yes Yeah. I think like

Jim:

do you think there could be

Unknown:

yeah I don't think it's like

The Miz:

ruling it out. Right anywhere Do you think the people who are controlling the simulation set or is the solar system with so

Bobby:

late show when you see this as a simulation right so when you see the aircraft that's actually like the roof they're like trying to repair it

The Miz:

it's it's like HGTV What are you talking about?

Unknown:

I don't even know what I'm I don't

Bobby:

know but remember, yeah, the sky and they're trying to Yeah, the UFO so it looks weird, but it's like really cleaning off the top of the like dome that covers

Jim:

Why would your universe be a simulation? Why would just this planet in a dome universe

Unknown:

but it's a projector? Oh my god,

Jim:

you're actually the ancient you are in ancient Greece. So you think that's what they bought a projector

Bobby:

projector screen that shows all the other universes and

Unknown:

no one like who see the galaxy.

Jim:

Like quite literally people in medieval times thought that that we there was a giant dome and there were holes in it. And the stars we saw were light coming through the holes into our sky. So you're just you're repeating shit from like,

Bobby:

wow, maybe I'm reincarnate

Unknown:

incarnate maybe I'm this kind of word

Jim:

is reincarnated.

Unknown:

Can you see I've been reading continent, no.

Bobby:

Brain content.

The Miz:

I've been reincarnated.

Bobby:

Oh my god this is falling out right now falling

Unknown:

out what even

The Miz:

conjugation is that?

Unknown:

None it doesn't exist incarnate reincarnate. He seen now I'm telling you to

Bobby:

incarnate

Jim:

reincarnate with na te but there is not an ENT reincarnates is not

Bobby:

a one I'm going to show you I am

Jim:

reincarnate. And now that's not a word. re incarnate is a word with entity thing do but you're not saying that.

Bobby:

You're a typical white person that's like you know like white people are really into making sure like they're like respecting cultures like when a white person orders Mexican food they'll be like Yes, I'll have the guacamole

Unknown:

sauce. And they're like trying to like see

Bobby:

Yeah, like they're like trying to be like they're trying to like like work it

Unknown:

oh my god newstand what you're saying I have no idea how to reincarnate. He needs this bell. Wow. You fucked up like put on the axe and make to make sure that you

Jim:

know my dad leaves but like my dad

The Miz:

is an example of this. I just don't even

Unknown:

unrelated fucking deep red and it's like, you know when you're in a Mexican restaurant and you

The Miz:

see grass Yeah, sick white person likes to respect culture, which is why I'm hanging with her name.

Unknown:

really don't know. Okay, well, that was something.

Bobby:

So your point but

Jim:

you went the other route. I don't even know how we went on that. You were like I'm reincarnation. Oh, you're talking about? You're talking about how the sky is a dome. And there's just people. There's birds fixing up the dome all the time that we think are planes. And you say they're not it's like have squeegees

Unknown:

on them.

Jim:

But why is it dirty?

The Miz:

Because the simulation, can they not have that? Yeah,

Jim:

the simulation should be able to clean it up. Once this is the shittiest simulation you've ever

The Miz:

thought, right? Like why would they? Why would they have glitched in the presence of dirt

Jim:

in their box so they can clean it up for

The Miz:

everyone but no one even knows we're cleaning it because that's still your theory. So what are they even achieving here?

Unknown:

I don't know. I can't speak.

Bobby:

Ring carnate because you were saying like it was back in the Middle Ages or whatever. And I was like maybe I

Jim:

was reincarnated and ancient and, and Hebrews thought that too, that the sky was Right. And the stars were just poked holes.

Bobby:

I've never thought of it that way that really freaks me out.

Jim:

They really I mean people thought

Bobby:

because then it makes me feel like we really are like a little.

Jim:

They didn't understand

The Miz:

the thing that's making it really real for you. That there's little I don't know,

Unknown:

back to talking about Star like moves

The Miz:

as they've been known to do. It's like the whole get

Unknown:

back up and then put the new one. No, it's turning. It's a kaleidoscope

Bobby:

kind of thing.

Jim:

They thought we were turning on disk. Like a record on a radar.

Bobby:

You know those little like things? It's like Kaleidoscope Yeah, but why? Because every so when the kaleidoscope goes one way but stars follow it and then it's like they're going

Unknown:

so weird.

The Miz:

I absolutely cannot understand why

Unknown:

No, no, I

The Miz:

don't I draw it out.

Bobby:

What you're talking about? No, it's

Unknown:

I really

Bobby:

you know what's funny about this though? I don't know if you took too much to no here's the thing.

The Miz:

What's the thing

Bobby:

last time I was being persecuted for not saying the right final thought. But when we went back to the fucking tape and rolled it,

The Miz:

and you still if that and that's not the right way. Roll

Unknown:

the tape. Roll the tape. Sure

Jim:

if you do that, that's your friends. I'm like

Unknown:

that make sure

Bobby:

you're gonna make sure if you're gonna share something with your friends that then

Unknown:

that then

Bobby:

Okay, I get it now.

Unknown:

You get a break.

Bobby:

I get the issue.

Unknown:

I'm falling out. Oh, Bobby, but well,

Bobby:

we will look at the tape we will look at the tape is yours are acting like I'm fucking insane. But when I come at it, it's gonna make sense. I'll give you the wrong you know

The Miz:

verbatim what was said last time. We don't need a tape.

Unknown:

Now. You said if that?

Bobby:

Fine, fine. All right, Jim. So what is your point? And you

Jim:

bitches like, okay, I interrupted you and talked about the world turning stars in the sky.

The Miz:

Can you do one more attempt at explaining.

Jim:

He's like there's a kaleidoscope in the sky above us. And it's turning in.

Unknown:

So imagine. Okay,

Jim:

and Jesus is looking down upon us turn it. Yeah, yeah, no. Nope. is yes,

Bobby:

Queen. So our night and day are a kaleidoscope desk. Okay, so when they turn the kaleidoscope, it turns the dark to light, the light to dark.

The Miz:

So where our whole planet is in a kaleidoscope? Correct?

Jim:

Well, you sound about as smart as the ancient Hebrews.

Bobby:

So what is why why am I wrong? And you're right. Oh, you know, because of

Unknown:

physics. Where they take out physics is made up when they replace

The Miz:

to let the nine day when we see a big ml it's like,

Bobby:

no, cuz it's a line every day. Have you ever seen the sunrise of the world? Like, you know, I'm talking about where it comes across in it lights, there's like a line and it lights

Unknown:

it like shifted shadow. That's called the horizon.

The Miz:

Rising Stars like overlap. Like what? No, because

Bobby:

it's the same sky. It's the same print every Well actually, that doesn't explain the sun.

The Miz:

Right? Like I'm talking about night and day, like when you like slide it

Unknown:

over window.

Jim:

Sometimes out with the sun.

The Miz:

Right? And then there's like, what different phases of the moon to the campus?

Unknown:

Come back. Oh, I'm

Jim:

sorry. Did physics ruin everything? I

Bobby:

had an interstellar moment.

Unknown:

Made I made a bookshelf.

Bobby:

I'm gonna push this book. Okay. Okay. So what is your point? Or what is your even fact? There's no

Jim:

point. This is just a discussion. The fact of the week is

Unknown:

the fact of the week. We had two of them.

Bobby:

You doubt at the beginning? Well, you're just texting on your computer. So you'd can remember what you're talking about. You and your computer is like me and Hi. So maybe we both need to just relax.

Jim:

I don't remember. I don't remember the other fat. I

Unknown:

think it just said it got too

The Miz:

sad. You're like, we're gonna do two things.

Bobby:

Two things this week. And then he said one. Have you seen the aircraft? And then I turn it into like window washers?

Jim:

Well, yeah, I mean, they're two separate things. One is, could life exist outside of Earth? We're looking for it. We haven't found it. And we've been looking a long time.

Bobby:

I say yes.

Jim:

I think it's possible. But like, why are we detecting it

Bobby:

and one thought is we can't get as far out as they are. The nearest

Jim:

planet to us is four light years away.

Bobby:

It takes 30 To get to like Pluto

Unknown:

brain thing,

Jim:

so nothing travels faster than light. Your I'll give you some facts on God. So how do you guys define life? Like what do you think of how do you say something? is living?

Bobby:

breathing animal? We

The Miz:

did we do this or plants a lot ago? No,

Unknown:

I swear.

Jim:

Well, I'm really glad he did this once ago and you guys can't come up with how to find life. This is great. And I just remember the blue

Bobby:

whale thing like mizani. Remember the week before, right?

Jim:

largest animal? And like I said one animal? No, it's like,

The Miz:

there's like there's like functionality in your organs.

Jim:

Right? Yeah, that's true. That's what we do. I'm in to maintain homeostasis, which is like, the sense of balance, right?

Bobby:

homeostasis.

Jim:

Okay. So things that are composed of cells, which are tiny, little houses, they have you have a life cycle, you're constantly changing up to the point of death, we're adapting. You can grow, you can reproduce. You can respond to stimuli, right? Like, if you poke a rock, it doesn't do anything.

Bobby:

So rock is not

Jim:

a living thing. It's gonna do something it should respond in some way. Even plants, right? So I agree in bacteria, everything. Okay, so that's a living thing. So what would life look like on other planets? Like, would it be the same? I don't

Bobby:

think would have the same definition. Oh, because their physics would be different than ours.

Jim:

Now physics are the same everywhere in the universe. But the chemical composition of the planet could be different.

Bobby:

Yes. Yeah. Like something. Yeah, I mean, I

Jim:

laws of physics are the same everywhere. Oh, really? Yeah. And I for every galaxy and every play? How do you know? We know because we've studied them

Bobby:

and other planets, and they're the exact so how do you know like, we didn't get a fucking a Seattle light. Satellite out to Pluto. Like,

Jim:

I know we have we've already gone beyond the solar system.

The Miz:

If the physical the same everywhere. Why does gravity not exist and atmospheres? Correct?

Jim:

Right? So gravity is the force between two things with mass. So gravity exists between you and the planet because the planet has mass, or you have mass. So the problem out as you get farther away from the center of a mass of an object, though, gravity, the force of gravity gets weaker and weaker and weaker. So there is actually no place in the universe with absolutely zero gravity. There is no zero gravity, there's always some black hole. Actually, the force of gravity in the black hole is so much that not even light can escape it. So there's even more gravity in the black hole. It's like almost like draining. So yeah, it pulls everything on a different planet,

The Miz:

your center of gravity is different.

Jim:

Your your personal body would be the same, but the force of gravity would be different. It has to

Bobby:

draw the planet.

Jim:

Yeah, it's the size of the planet. Oh my fuck. It's the amount of mass. It's the amount of mass and it's all that's really cool about mass. That's why it has a higher gravity than you that are earth because it's

The Miz:

bigger. Are the sizes of the planets, I guess then vastly different.

Unknown:

Yes. Isn't

Bobby:

that why Mars though, is similar to us? Like what? scrab Mars is similar

Jim:

to us? It's not quite as

Unknown:

big. Interesting. Okay, so, um,

Jim:

so why do you think we rotate around the sun? The reason the sun's gravity holds us in is because its mass is so much bigger than all the planets around it. So planets are tracking. trippy as fuck, if

Bobby:

you look at it, like a drain or some. Like, if you're looking in a bathtub as like, I can't.

Jim:

That's what they call it space. Oh, like, here's what made Einstein so crazy, is when he realized this force of gravity and how it worked. He called it folds in the space time, right. So if you imagine space time as this like giant blanket, and you put a ball on the blanket, it's going to push down into space time. And that groove is kind of like what gravity does, it pulls things into it. So if you make a groove from a ball dropping in a planet, and then you put a little ball next to the planet, it's gonna fall down into the groove, closer to the planet. So it's like a Stang. All of these planets are going around the Sun because the sun has such a huge force of gravity, so pulls them closer. And

Bobby:

we not get sucked out from our, our universe to another universe, like can we get sucked in somewhere? You know, I'm saying?

Jim:

Well, the problem is that the universe right now is expanding at a rapid pace. So we're not even close. We're getting further and further away from every other galaxy around us at all times.

Bobby:

Rapid it is way too far we

Jim:

are and we can tell that because we look at the light waves. So when we look out at all the light, we can say the because different energy of light comes back as a different color kind of. So there's visible light spectrum, but there's also other types of waves and energy waves that come back at different frequencies. So we can see is the frequency increasing or slowing down? Is it becoming less so you can see that all the other galaxies around us are expanding They're going away from us, because of the energy coming back to us.

Bobby:

So So I think there's life in our galaxy

Unknown:

right there.

Bobby:

I don't know if there is in our universe.

Jim:

Oh, well, there's a lot of galaxies like us there could be I mean, similar. The question is, has it evolved at the same speed as us and at the same time as us? So like elsewhere? Could it have happened at an earlier point in time, like our Earth has been around 4.6 billion years? That's it. And life has long existed, maybe 3 billion of them. So your life and the rest of the universe come about at the same time? Is it still there? Or did a transfer here did the star explode and consumed the planet and that life's over? So we have to exist at the same time as other life, we also have to have both figured out how to communicate with each other in order to find each other or talk with each other. Right? What if they're single celled organisms? And they can't communicate? Right? Right? Yeah, life could exist, but we're not going to

Bobby:

pull that right. I don't know if it's gonna be like, a,

Jim:

I don't know, though you just don't know. Like, is the backbone of life elsewhere? is the backbone made of carbon? As we're all carbon based? all life on this planet? That is really so are we based on another molecule? I'm

Bobby:

telling you, I feel like the theory of space in the universe. It's cool. It's amazing. But I also feel like how is that any different than like a simulation theory? Like simulation?

Jim:

Because we can prove it? No, because you can prove how do you prove

Bobby:

okay, but you can't prove it. You can do it by like math, or whatever. But how do you prove it like you can't physically go there, you can't physically see what happens really out there, you're just you're actually, you're actually just like, have a hypothesis of Well,

Jim:

so what we're looking for, we're looking for Molecular signatures, when we use a telescope to look at another planet, and it's based on light, because light reflects off of every object and molecule differently. So we can look at the wavelength of light coming back to us to see Oh, that's methane, or Oh, that's oxygen. Oh, that's water. Every, every substance, every molecule reflects light differently. So that's what we're looking for. We're looking for the signature of life, we're looking for water, we're looking for carbon, we're looking for gas, like we're looking for all of the phosphorus.

Bobby:

That's how we view life, though. That's the most back to your question

Jim:

that goes by the question of what else could life be made of? Because there's only so many elements in the hole, what if there's

Bobby:

other things that like, I think really, other things could go by and different like place, like they have a different set of rules. But like, instead of water and blah, blah, it's gold and phosphorus and ginseng, so it works on their side.

Jim:

So the problem is, they have the same rules as us, they might have different materials, but at a certain level of number of protons in the nucleus. substances cannot be alone. Yeah, because the periodic table of elements is very precise. It's like the nucleus nucleus has one proton in it. The next element, this nucleus has to like hydrogen has one proton in it, helium has two protons in it, that's the nucleus, you go, you go down the list, you got lithium, and then you go across. So like, the Table of Elements is the same for every substance out in the universe. And we have discovered, we have had to create some of these substances in a lab. And they're very unstable, and they disappear after eight seconds or less like one second that that element is gone. You can only push protons together to a certain point to a certain mass. So there's some point where like, there aren't elements made of anywhere else. This is sorry, this is going too much. But basically,

Unknown:

so a lot to take in.

The Miz:

No, it's interesting, because it's to us, or to me and Bobby, it's intangible. I know other people can like see it and like

Bobby:

have studied at a gym can see. And he's like, Oh, yeah, the light reflects off differently.

Unknown:

But

The Miz:

to people who like are like well trained, and I'm sure it's not far fetched. But I'm not claiming

Unknown:

to know

Jim:

anything about those. It's just the problem of life could exist. But how do we ever like we can detect elements of life. But when something is four light years away, nothing travels faster than the speed of light, nothing in the universe. And we can't even get close to it with the objects we can make. Because our mass, the things we make is too high, like a spaceship can never go the speed of light. So when it says something is four light years away, that's our closest planet four light years. A light year is the distance light travels in a year. That's how far away four light years is. So four, we can't even travel as fast as light. And four light years is okay, this thing is four years worth of light travel away.

Unknown:

That Wow, like,

Jim:

so that's so far away. So we can look at it and say like, yeah, there might be there could be water on that planet. But how are we going to get there? How are we going to communicate with them? How are they going to send things to us? I can't and if they've been around longer. They've been around longer than us. And they're more advanced than us. Maybe they've just like they know we're here but we don't know they're there. And they're like, we don't need to fuck with them like they're stupid. Still. They don't know what they're doing. They're ruining the planet like blah blah. Like look how high the levels are. So I just think it's interesting to think of could there be life elsewhere? The other point that this goes to and the thing that made me think about this and trigger it was that the Pentagon acknowledge that some of these videos that the Navy has captured could be UFOs. Yeah, like they've acknowledged. They acknowledge that yeah, these objects aren't we don't know what they are moving like we are, our space objects would move. They're not moving like our aircraft possessed scare you. Where do they

Unknown:

go, hey.

Bobby:

I think it was in like Virginia, of course has a Pentagon.

Unknown:

In the fucking sky. Actually, they're

Jim:

now called uaps unidentified aerial phenomenon,

Bobby:

so we don't use it. I don't believe in like, like the aliens and I don't believe in like, oh, I've been abducted, abducted.

Jim:

Green alien, right. I really look like humans. But I actually think

Bobby:

like, you know what, I think

Jim:

our computers

Bobby:

could be the pyramids are actually spaceships. And that's what they saw in the sky. was a pyramid. Like the Egyptian pyramids. Yeah, like not there. No, they're there. Now I know they're there. No, those are permanent. But those landed and crashed on Earth. But like, that's what's out there is that the shingles?

The Miz:

Just,

Bobby:

it was made to land like that, and they couldn't get back out.

Unknown:

This bitch is crazy, Bobby. Okay.

The Miz:

Do I want to theorizing

Bobby:

and I feel scary?

Unknown:

Excuse me?

Jim:

No, I'm just kidding. I don't want you to cut back on the weed. It's the most entertaining.

The Miz:

You should make like some kind of like, animated TV series of all these random crazy things you're talking about?

Bobby:

I need a good artist. Actually. Maybe I'll try that

Unknown:

little pyramid. Oh, let

Bobby:

me just make another. I know it sound like a fucking Actually, I should do like a little kid voicing what I'm saying. Right?

Unknown:

Like, I make the life is a kaleidoscope and the sky is returning in the look the sun. It's the clients comp desk.

Jim:

Like this fucking dumb ass right?

Unknown:

You can turn that into a fucking franchise.

Bobby:

franchise. Maybe.

Unknown:

You can make like,

The Miz:

a children's TV program. Like what the fuck?

Bobby:

Oh my god. You couldn't you could? Oh my god.

Unknown:

A

Bobby:

letter A through the universe or whatever? Yeah.

Unknown:

As for aliens pays for aliens. B

The Miz:

is for Bobby. B

Bobby:

is for Bobby. That's very interesting, Jim.

Jim:

So I'm not sure what we've learned. But yeah, I think we've learned we've had a discussion we've had. I guess you learned how gravity works. So that's true.

Unknown:

Oh, boy. Oh, how

Jim:

do magnets work? Wow.

Bobby:

I mean, I'm just kind of flabbergasted.

Unknown:

It is cool. It is amazing.

Bobby:

I think it's amazing. I mean, it's fucking amazing.

Unknown:

The more you know, with Jeff. Well,

Jim:

this has been depressing.

Bobby:

No, it's been very interesting. There was something else I wanted to say. But I can't think of what it was.

The Miz:

Well, damn it.

Bobby:

Ah, all right. Well, guess what, then that means it's final thoughts.

Unknown:

Okay,

The Miz:

why is the song for Final Thoughts? That's

Unknown:

my final thought. Oh,

Bobby:

that was a quick final thought. That should be a song for it. So should I make like a like a background song like a

The Miz:

permanent background song like a song that there is for

Unknown:

Brian or thought

Jim:

in the universe, like I'll do

The Miz:

the two options that you guys just demo for me? By?

Unknown:

Okay.

Bobby:

Don't make me demo something for you again, bitch. Mr. Warner, whatever you fucking said earlier, like I was an intern. Well, and my final thought is, and I feel like this is like a common theme. But like, make sure you have your shit in a row before you like start talking. Like I'm really struggling lately. I'm not gonna lie. I feel like there's not that many stories happening in my life. Like this week. I was like, I got the fucking second shot now still, and I was like most a give true. But like, I just don't feel like there has been a story for me in the past couple of days, weeks, months. Yeah, that's coming back to worry though.

The Miz:

And this guy know something you want to talk? Yeah,

Bobby:

that's true. clintonville Well, Jim, what's your final thought then?

Unknown:

What was that

The Miz:

siren on?

Jim:

Cat in a haunted house.

Bobby:

All right, well, well thank you guys for coming. Happy Wednesday. Thank you for everyone for spending your time with us really appreciate it.

The Miz:

We had a great time.

Bobby:

I mean, I have a spot wow you're so convincing right now you're fun yeah this has been another episode of She's Not Doing So Well.

Unknown:

Air and the man's that was from Moby Moby

Bobby:

Yeah. So see you guys later bye

Unknown:

may buy Goodbye Thank you for listening to another episode of She's Not Doing So Well. Leave a message with questions or comments at 669-207-4643 Don't forget to subscribe and check out our links in the podcast description of this episode. These information will be expressing the official policy or position of another agency. This has been a house of bread production