Teabag Him, Mary! (Originality, Death, Voice Messages, Alcohol)

Bobby: 0:00

They say opinions are like assholes. I think yours is prolapsed. You might want to go get that checked out. Sweet. Hi. Have a great day. Welcome to She's Not Doing So Well. Comedy podcast featuring Bobby. I don't want to be viral. I want to be inspirational and life changing. Because Listen, I'm at a GE

Jim: 0:31

gym at the top. What can I say? Finally he's just like you can unfollow me if you don't like my body. The Ms.

The Miz: 0:39

Oh my god, tell me all about your brain, but you like mushroom shape. Hey, ladies, pop that pose.

Bobby: 0:53

Hello, everybody. Welcome to an episode of She's Not Doing So. Well. I'm Bobby. I'm Jim. I'm the meze. Thank you so much for joining us again. Oh my god loves the claps and I don't give a fuck.

Jim: 1:07

He does look at his little miss listen

Bobby: 1:09

to our show for the first time. This past weekend. Loved it. I think that's really great.

Jim: 1:13

Yeah, he posted about online. He's like, Oh, I absolutely loved the show. I

Bobby: 1:17

posted our conversation online means like, What the fuck is this? I'm like, this is you, acknowledging of our shows

The Miz: 1:22

actually become an Instagram post.

Bobby: 1:25

It's actually funny. It's called content because everyone knows how you are. So I'm just giving them an inside to our lives. And I've been getting a

Jim: 1:32

lot of Ruin loved a lot of feedback that people are liking the new Well, it's actually a fan.

Bobby: 1:42

I mean, first of all, don't make fun of the likes on that picture. Because we all know that if it wasn't if you're not naked on there, then you're not getting any acknowledgement. So yeah, I think I'm gonna start posting our show. Like, go listen to this week's episode and just being like a jock. You know? I'm saying Yeah, okay, let's do that. Like just being hoarse. Like, fuck it. I don't care anymore.

Jim: 2:00

And I'm tan right now. I'm ready. Tan to girl, not

Bobby: 2:04

like the honey. Look at this line. Okay, let's just, let's just talk about this line. Babe. Honey, you have your own. Oh, you want to line up? I need a light. I was like you have your own fucking camera. Get your hand out of my camera.

Jim: 2:19

We don't all have five ring lights on us right now.

Bobby: 2:22

I'm sorry, but sometimes have to be the fucking, like some sort of talent and some sort of luck.

Jim: 2:26

You're gay. You're like, it takes a lot of light to make this look good.

Bobby: 2:31

And it does. And it does. And I'm acknowledging that I'm trying to work it out. Real quick housekeeping, my birthdays on Saturday.

Jim: 2:42

I'm not ready for the tears. I'll bring Kleenex.

Bobby: 2:44

So yeah, like,

The Miz: 2:47

what does that mean for everyone?

Jim: 2:49

I mean, it's 37. That means 37 which

Bobby: 2:51

means I'm basically like, I don't even know. You thought last year was bad. This year is gonna be worse. I'm basically 40 Yeah,

Jim: 2:58

you're all Yeah, we need to acknowledge that that were like, a couple years away from 40. Now,

Bobby: 3:03

form is he's like, why do I even talk to these fucking people, but

Jim: 3:07

he's not even in our decade.

Bobby: 3:08

What's great though, is that we are like three like young, middle old. Oh, I'm the old one. Yeah, I was like, I'm not really in the middle. They don't call me on. You're in the middle. Yeah, you're not 35 yet. True. Once you hit 35 that's when all shit goes down. But anyway, we got to keep this show rolling. On the web. Thank you for joining us on bareback. But Toby I did take. I came home immediately since we were recording. I was like, I gotta take an edible immediately. I was like, did you so math are in hell. So by the end of this, it's gonna be bad. I have a lot of notes this week, guys. Like I'm sorry. That's shocking. Okay, so first things first. I'm just gonna go out and play a little clip. Because today, you know how I go get my Wendy's baked potato. You know how I like to park in the parking lot away from the building. Yeah, and sob and sob and just like realize that I hate life.

The Miz: 4:16

Yeah, that's my favorite thing about you. Okay, so I'm just gonna play this real quick.

Bobby: 4:19

This is a clip from my car. Hey, I'm sitting in the car. One of my co workers is walking up and I'm trying to Why is he coming up to my car? I'm hiding on my phone right now. Can I help you? I'm carless. Take me away or where am I taking you? So are you Carlos today So anyway, he continued to talk about Black Lives Matter and all this stuff in here. 16 minutes worth, but he's a co worker, but he's homeless. Now he didn't have he hit a deer. So he didn't have a car that day, but he came down because he knows how much I'm like. That's my moment. That's my quiet time. Don't fucking talk to me. He's like, why don't you come down here? I go, cuz I don't want people to come up to me like you are right now. Right? Okay. I was so fucking pissed. And finally at the end after 16 minutes of talking to him. I was like, all right, well, I got to finish my Oh, you're kicking me out. I'm like, yeah, this is my time. Not you're not even. I literally was finishing my baked potato. I am no like, I was like, finishing it and talking sometimes like so. I was thinking like, get the hand. I'm biting potatoes getting cold. Yeah, get out, like get out. Now. So I hid the burger that I got. So I went a little skinny. And so I was like, Okay, I'm gonna put this burger and like, just move the trash around. I don't want to like trash rocks.

The Miz: 5:59

Wait until like all the sudden Do you just like pull out a big potato out of your glove box and be like, yeah, yeah, continue.

Bobby: 6:05

Yeah, cuz I was already almost done with this. I was like, Yeah, I just got to make potato with chili and cheese and sour cream.

Jim: 6:12

One tube, but I'll keep the big potato out.

Bobby: 6:15

Like I'm losing weight by just eating these like, cheese. Potatoes.

The Miz: 6:23

I just wanted to be skinny. So you know, let me be skinny only how my big potato my loaded baked potato out from plain sight.

Bobby: 6:32

I can't help. Like, I can't help it. But I was trying to have a fucking moment. And of course he wanted a ride to his house. joking. I always joke. I don't want to hang up from that honey.

Jim: 6:42

Guy or no, no, no. Good.

Bobby: 6:45

I seem like Carlo, so I'm not gonna say his name just in case. Oh, I thought it was. No, I'm not kidding. Nope. Oh, so anyway. Yeah, so that was really fucking annoying, cuz I see. And he's the kind that like, you can't really escape his conversations and like, there's really not ever a good conversation if that makes sense. It's always just like, Well, what do you think about bla bla bla and I'm like,

The Miz: 7:07

floor it. Like fucking sia.

Bobby: 7:09

I know. You want to ride your fucking ride? Oh, so anyway, that was added to the list today. But I hit record thing and I was like, Oh, that's the first time I've actually like thought my favorite

The Miz: 7:20

thing is hearing you just shuffle away your foods and go go

Jim: 7:23

out with my shovel hide the three Junior bacon. Yeah, I was like, oh

Bobby: 7:26

my god. I'm thinking of one like. Okay, so I also have a butt plug update. Okay. Yay. Hi. Um, okay, so, here's the process of what was going in my head. So it's big. Okay, we said that when you got it out, like it's pretty big where I was like, never seen I've never like it's like walking around the deck in my ass. Like, yeah, so then so I put it in and I kept like, you had like, really get it up there because it was like big so I had to like it was like yeah, it was fucking huge. So I'm, I get it up there. But I was really freaked out that my asshole is gonna eat the little like, like he was gonna go on my ass on the ER. How do I get over that fear?

Jim: 8:07

You can't Okay, you just trusted it won't? Because it can go in there. Yeah,

The Miz: 8:11

it probably

Bobby: 8:12

that's what i can think I'm like, I'm gonna I'm gonna have to pump out a pot plug in this but plug is huge. Like, okay, look wouldn't be able to like I'll be in the ER like yeah, it's just like the beginner when I think they're like, No, sir. This is out there. Like this is the title. A little pop noise. It was like me you're like, Oh, I tried to FaceTime you guys while it was happening, but nobody picked up while you were pulling it out or putting it in while it was in. I was actually making I called you guys and you guys were like, God damn it. Sorry. You guys were busy was Friday. I called back and you're like I'm about to get fucked. Well, right. Like I'm not gonna talk to you. Well, now my partner's like preparing to enter me. Oh, wow, that was disgusting. Sorry, Jesus. I was like, No, nobody wants to picture that. So by pulling update, that's another thing I read on the list. Thank you.

Jim: 8:59

Does anybody have any advice? Just trusted? I think trusted but I think I mean, how did it go afterwards? Would it help with your loosening up situation? Yes. And no. Because it's just there's like to shrink, shrink, shrink. shrink. shrinkers

Bobby: 9:15

so like your first one that like clears away for the first one. But then there's an inner hole? Does it go that high? No. Yeah, you don't talk about where you have to pass the wall kinda. God is your now that's if you have a big partner. That's what you're dealing with. He had to get through the next level. And I was like,

Jim: 9:31

and it still hurts. Yeah,

Bobby: 9:32

yeah. So I basically said I hate being a bottom and I hate fucking having sex. So that's what I decided. Yeah,

The Miz: 9:39

that sounds about right. I'm not actually a fan.

Jim: 9:41

Why do you think I haven't bought him years? It's just the worst. Yeah,

Bobby: 9:44

I can't. So also, a little funny story yesterday. We were at Jackie's pool, and she had one of her co workers there and he was okay. Yes. And so we were all hanging out. Of course, I'm chubby as fuck and he basically has a stick and that's fine. Whatever. So I have my caftan Well, my caftan fell over during it like the wind blew or something I fell over and then kerosene got on it. So I had to hang it back up. So I'm getting out of the pull down. I go, Hey, can you hear me that and he picked it up and he goes, Oh, I thought this was an umbrella. Thank you so much cuz I am absolutely telling that so I was laughing so hard cuz I was like, of course you'd think it was a fucking umbrella like it's no it's it goes over me.

The Miz: 10:26

Kings I was a blanket. My actual clothing garment, not an umbrella. But thank you.

Bobby: 10:33

This is actually going to cover my disgusting body so that you don't have to see it. Oh, now has kerosene on it. So I can't wear it. So what do you do? It's like drape it over you. So then I washed off with the watch the fucking hose and the neighbor was out talking to me. And I'm like, I'm like in a full blackout like shirtless minute. I don't really like talking to people. I never

Jim: 10:51

talked with a shirt. I've never seen just stand around with a shirt. Like

Bobby: 10:54

I'm not sad. It's like, Yeah, and I know a lot of people that actually do take off their shirts and they're fine with it. For me, it's just not I'm just not comfortable. I'm the same way. So there's the neighbor who's like 68 years old who came out and was like, want to have a small talk and I'm like, I'm fully blacked out. I have to pee. That's when I was a little texting you guys too. And you can't suck in when you have to pay. That's the word Honey, you know? So I'm like standing like, I should have fucking peed in the pool. I'm just kidding. should have just shut up. Honestly, I wish it would be common pool all the time. If I'm gonna be honest with you. Like I feel like it should just be like a thing. Like it's fine. There's plenty of chlorine. If I

The Miz: 11:30

were at your house and I were in your pool i'd piano like full on me.

Bobby: 11:33

I'm not saying that. I haven't let any slide ever like when you just peed the pee again. You know, it's clear because like you're not your first pee. You know what I mean? It's got to be like a couple down the line after you've been drinking then you're like well, fuck it's like water. Now the first pee

The Miz: 11:47

I'll just I'll just swish it away. No,

Bobby: 11:50

I'm doing the first pay. Like I this is for me. It's not comfortable. So as also while I was in the goddamnit Oh, say something. Say what you're gonna say.

Jim: 11:59

I was gonna say is this a tiva? Like what are you on girl? Oh, right now yeah, I'm like this new energy I'm living for I'm just

Bobby: 12:09

really excited to talk to you guys. I say love it. Is that weird?

Jim: 12:12

You are I love my art. I am I'm really funny. This like these notes would take you like half an hour. Well, I

Bobby: 12:18

know. We're like that. Yeah, like I'm just trying to keep us on pace because we have so many hours to go lift weights or something. When he was sleeping all day, because you had to. I'm like, okay, we have this fucking hour window. Let's go. Okay, so really what I wanted, I decided that I'm going to read this word by word because I think I wrote yesterday fully key to life per Bobby's revelation, be yourself and be authentic because if you try to be someone else, or like someone else that's already been done, and you're a dime a dozen Oh, wait. So if you are loud obnoxious then be loud and obnoxious. So basically, what I've learned and realized is that you have got to be yourself in order to be somebody special is that make sense? So we see these comedians, we see these podcasters we see these people we look up to and we're like I want to be like them but nobody wants you to be like them. They want something new and different which is you that makes sense an example of that.

The Miz: 13:17

Well like for example a comedian or podcast or do we want to be like

Bobby: 13:22

I should have been ready for this for me like well I don't know he really okay ish No, you know what? I'm kind of on the fence with them at this point there's another thing but I'm not gonna go he likes

Jim: 13:33

Ms. Mr.

Bobby: 13:35

Mix which he gave you the link to the Brazilian Do you see that on discord? I did not Holy fuck I said at Jimbo he put the whole video up Oh yeah. Oh

Jim: 13:49

no part in that direction.

Bobby: 13:51

Oh, no, no, no. Yeah, the revelation Okay, so like for instance Ms. Like why are you going to the gym tonight?

The Miz: 13:57

Okay, but me wanting to look like somebody is not me wanting to be a different community or progress

Bobby: 14:02

right but what makes you think that everybody wants to see another six pack guy

The Miz: 14:05

well I mean various things but I also just want to look like that

Bobby: 14:11

just not but not influenced by anybody. Just you that's how you want to look.

The Miz: 14:15

Well. I think that generally speaking the people I would be attracted to would prefer someone to look like that. Yeah. So you're doing it for them to be able to Yes, have sex with people who want to have sex with Yeah, otherwise you're not going to

Jim: 14:29

that's a lot of work for honey

Bobby: 14:30

honey when you're bent over not looking You don't even know who's fucking Yeah.

Jim: 14:35

When you're in the middle of

Unknown: 14:36

a brand you guys

The Miz: 14:36

have a bat but I definitely have not yet.

Jim: 14:40

I have a I just think it's very risky to do all this work and then hope that a hot guy is gonna fuck you because they might not

The Miz: 14:48

because you can because they like bears now

Jim: 14:50

Don't let Yeah, they don't. I mean, they probably wouldn't that be a bitch. No,

The Miz: 14:55

because you get to talk to people and you start to develop plans and then I always chicken out Because now or think that I won't.

Bobby: 15:03

Yeah. So what if you're perfect the way you are though, then fine with that I made it all up. But okay, so now let's spin it. So the feeling that you have about that. So being a comedian, let's do it on a comedian. Do you ever like you're very unique and your comedy? And I say that to you? I'm like, keep going with that. Yeah, that's what I mean. Okay, you're not up there being like Amy Schumer, or like, someone who's already famous. You're doing you? Okay. So my revelation is I've always done stuff based on trying to be somebody else. Yeah. So that's where I'm sort of. So my new philosophy is just be yourself is really, I'm just trying to fucking say,

The Miz: 15:37

I had that from a personality mental perspective, but not from an appearance perspective. For me, personally, for some people. All the way. But for me and my dad, I

Bobby: 15:49

mean, there's plenty of people like you. I mean, it's like you're like an anomaly or anything like and there's people like us who've given up I mean, it just it is what I know yet. I still worked out is I still work out for this mediocre body like this is what's happening. This is 37. So it's 3737 socks. Do you want to add anything else? Are you going to just like now look at porn. Oh, on the thing that I told you about?

Jim: 16:11

Why did you have to tell me in the middle of what because I just remembered but now it's rude. Now I have it open and I want to watch it.

Bobby: 16:18

Great. Okay, there's other things I want to talk about, too. There's only one other thing that really so fats. Tell me about? Yes. Want to talk about fats. There's two things. There's one thing I just don't want to talk about talking about for some reason that I have ever told you the story about when I first came out? Oh my god, I am like on crack right now.

The Miz: 16:37

I'm literally like, I don't know what's up. I don't

Jim: 16:40

even hate a segment is really like 65 it's gonna let you go for an hour. Just like can we just react to and today now play the music for my segment and then keep?

Bobby: 16:51

Yeah, no, no. Yes. So I can. I can do this on my own. So I can just do it on my own. It's why we've been telling you this whole

The Miz: 16:59

time.

Jim: 17:00

We've been trying to support you in that for two years.

Bobby: 17:03

That is so rude.

Jim: 17:05

Every week where like maybe he'll realize,

Bobby: 17:08

listen, if you guys want to cut and bounce and bounce.

The Miz: 17:11

Tell us normally

Bobby: 17:14

when you quit every night please. Oh my god, I

Jim: 17:26

really miss quit like four times last week. He's like, I don't think I can do it anymore. Well, I know I'm about to just go to bed like 4am we

Bobby: 17:33

talked about what is Texas this morning. I'm lying. And last night. I was wondering when you were like Sorry. I'm just like apologizing ahead of time for my desire.

The Miz: 17:43

I'd like to apologize in advance for the monster I'm going to be this week and I do apologize.

Bobby: 17:48

I feel the shift actually happening right now like he's gonna go workout but I feel like he's gonna stop fucking at the bar is done.

The Miz: 17:54

No, I carry on. And that's why I'm going to be huge monster.

Bobby: 17:58

Because you're staying sober to try to be really really skinny for last. Okay, got it. Oh, God. Well, I don't know what's worse.

Jim: 18:06

La likes bigger people, actually. Well,

The Miz: 18:08

I want to take good photos for the people back in New York.

Jim: 18:12

Oh, you're in the wrong city, honey.

Bobby: 18:16

Actually, actually, I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan. Okay, so I want to talk about this one thing. I don't know where this came from. This actually came from to my thoughts today, actually, cuz I stumbled on a picture on

Jim: 18:26

how thoughts work. They come into your head into my thoughts today.

Bobby: 18:29

It was speaking of like getting in shape or like trying to like figure out your life to like date somebody when I first started dating. Wow. When I first started dating, I thought the Rough Rider for bad here. They are bad here. They're like arresting them. Finally, for the ones that are shooting. Um, I mean, it's true. It's true. True. So I first started dating like when I came out, I was like, Okay, now I can date

Jim: 18:59

right skinny then

Bobby: 19:02

you showed a picture that was skinny and young with me host catfish. Free No, this was post Oh, this was post this is after my first little heartbreak ish thing that wasn't real, but I thought I was real. So anyway, so I think I'm gonna start I'm gonna get myself out there. So of course I want to plenty of fish. Don't judge me. I know. That's like money. It was before Tinder, but not before Grindr. Excuse me. There's plenty of people in Columbus that are actually

Jim: 19:31

plenty of fish in Colonia better.

Bobby: 19:33

This is actually when it was like kind of okay. Median. It's okay. Well, it's here in Ohio.

Jim: 19:40

You're like singles for Trump calm at that point. Like why were you on this?

Bobby: 19:44

I didn't know what else to do. I didn't know any resources. Christian Christian gays.com. So I met this guy on there and we went on a little date. Like it was great. Like we would text back and forth. It wasn't that great, whatever, blah, blah. So there was another guy on there. Who I was talking At the same time, I told the story now I don't know this one. I was talking at the same time. And he basically was like trying to go on a date with me. But then he goes, Well, I know who you are. I know you went on a date with Anthony, he's my friend. And so basically, it became this thing where they basically were talking about me and saying shit to me, like, cuz a lot of the conversations were kind of similar. So like, I would respond to one person I respond to the other person. I feel like it was the same like kind of set up yet to see what I would say. So you were catfished I was kind of like, bullied. I feel bullied. These guys were a little bit older, but they were friends. One was a newscaster, the other is a fucking doctor. I'll fuck them. Fuck. If they ever hear the show, finally. They were like my age now.

Jim: 20:46

So they were asking you questions to test how you and yes.

Bobby: 20:49

So then, every time I'd see him out out in public and be like, Oh, hey, Bobby, like consume. And I don't know where that came from today that like maybe this is like me trying to release something that's been bothering me. or lease, but I'm releasing like, that really bothered me especially coming out even though I was older. I still was really young and dating, right? Yeah, so I didn't know what the

The Miz: 21:12

experiences for the rest of your 30s on plenty of fucking fish. like are you kidding me? Yeah.

Jim: 21:23

Yeah. Oh, but I do want to know like, Why Why is it bad that you were talking to multiple people? Well, that's the other thing I'm like worried

The Miz: 21:31

about what were they trying?

Bobby: 21:33

Well, and that's what they made it like a I feel it was a game for that it was a game and so then they the way that the way out would be like you're talking to both at the same time. Like you didn't say or I don't even remember and why luckily one moved away and the other one my last time we one of them kill themselves thing fuck. The other one died as well. And actually, No, he didn't. Because I that's what I saw on Facebook. That's what made me think about this whole thing. Why do you see my Facebook friends? I know he's friends with somebody I know. Now fuck them. I need to see it. So. So basically, though, but the guy that the first guy, he was like, I just wanna let you know that I have a really small deck, but I love to Sokak. That's his, that's his opening, you're gonna get me shit. Correct. So that's where I kind of like so I've been like really pondering this. And I'm thinking, if I because I think they were like, 34 maybe disgusting. But at that point, like, what the fuck? Are you doing enough to somebody who and they knew I just came out because that was like my narrative for a long time. Like, I just came out. I'm just trying to like, it's like,

Jim: 22:34

why did they have to share that it was ballcock if you haven't seen a bunch, correct? Well, at

Bobby: 22:37

that point, I had seen a lot.

The Miz: 22:39

But like, Who? Who opens with that? And or, like, shares that like relatively is the opening statement. But I think it was definitely you hadn't

Bobby: 22:48

met him yet? How'd you know, but we did go on a date. And he didn't pay. Oh, my

Unknown: 22:54

and the older guy didn't pay. Yeah, the older doctor. Yeah. And he already told me that he knows. I'm done.

Jim: 23:01

Yeah, these people. Oh my god. You

Bobby: 23:03

know what? Fuck him. And I helped me here's all the fish. Hello. It was a fucking weatherman and a doctor. You go and tell me you know, I can't I know. And I'm like, and how did it? It's plenty of fish. It's an inexperienced person. I almost thought they were like, Oh, he just can't let's I don't

Jim: 23:21

know I wouldn't you and me do this like that. Right? Well, let's go on and catfish, some 27 year old who just came out, and we'll both talk to him and we'll just compare notes. Right? Like, why

Bobby: 23:32

and then I know and that's why and they really hurt my feelings. Like when it happened. I was like, I think I cried probably like, I was like, very upset. Just like, cuz like, I don't know anybody here like, I'm new here still like, and I'm trying to talk to these people. And everybody fucking hates me. Like I felt they hated me. So that's before I met my friend Ryan. Oh, so then I met my friend Ryan. I don't think what's your plan first on the scrub. We

Jim: 23:53

interviewed him on this now. You never

Bobby: 23:55

would know Ryan's one that lives near. Obi Wan no lives near Dave. Okay. In the Bible is fully gay now.

Jim: 24:07

Oh, he transitioned. He's like,

Bobby: 24:09

I don't know who else kidding. I was like, Yeah, I don't know. But anyway, I just want to say that I think I'm just getting it off my chest. Bob's I know, isn't that sad? Like, I'm gonna never do that somebody though. Like, I've never got to someone who just came out knowingly. Do you know I mean, like, we're

The Miz: 24:25

like, like, like, like, what do you gain? And that's what what it is it shows like how dissatisfied they are in their own lives. Like, what are you gaining from doing that? Right? And so

Bobby: 24:35

as an adult, and as a 30, almost 37 year old. I understand that today, but at the time as a as an older, like a 28 solar. I was your age Ms. But I was so young engage. I just think this fucking road. So honestly, if ever see them and we're all out, I'll point them out to you.

The Miz: 24:54

Yeah, I'm gonna sharpen my knife and good.

Bobby: 24:58

Yeah, we'll shake him. I'll shake my My Pocket it's the short North shank and Ron baby. Right after that. I can have a shank and Ron I'm shaking today. Thanks Shane King. Oh my god I'm gonna shake shaking. shake me Oh, that isn't a dagger tie dagger to your topic. Oh my god. Yeah, and that movie seven.

The Miz: 25:33

Oh my god. Yeah, I need to see that stone.

Jim: 25:36

I'm pretty sure that

Bobby: 25:37

you've mentioned it twice now. Oh my goodness, guys. I

Jim: 25:41

really think I

Bobby: 25:43

have one other thing but it does not tie in at all. Okay. And it's like really downer so I almost think I don't know if I want to. The last thing is this. Is it offensive to not be next to someone you love? Who is

The Miz: 25:54

dying? Now? What?

Bobby: 25:57

Right? See how fucked up that Gemma's face right now. I just like he just like, what's the question? Wow, that'd be fun. Is it? Was it offensive? Like to not

Jim: 26:07

be next to someone as they're literally dying? Yeah. If you have the choice to be Yeah, you should be by like,

Bobby: 26:13

is it offensive

Jim: 26:13

though? to them? Probably. Wow. This person? Yeah.

Bobby: 26:18

Well,

The Miz: 26:20

I think a lot of people like last memories, people should be preserved how they wish to be on someone's deathbed. And a lot of people I mean, if you're the person dying, are you gonna apply that to every single person you love and want like your entire friends and family? So?

Jim: 26:36

I love I mean, do you mean? Well? Yeah, most people would want their friends. You want

The Miz: 26:40

your entire like network? To be terrified?

Unknown: 26:43

I don't know. I don't know.

The Miz: 26:44

When I die. What do you guys say we say? friends

Bobby: 26:50

want to be at your best if you died.

Jim: 26:52

Right next to me. Hopefully like parents, my partner, or your siblings.

The Miz: 26:57

I wouldn't want all the people I love to see me die like.

Jim: 27:02

Obviously not dealt with this. I've done this like four times. You don't have the whole family. You've seen somebody die? Yes. I've seen no real people die.

The Miz: 27:11

Oh, I didn't care to be there for that.

Jim: 27:15

You don't? Yeah, cuz it's your grandma. But like, you don't have the whole extended family in the room. And they're actually actively dying, like at the end. And usually the partner, the spouse, maybe the kids. That's it. But like the extended family is around in the house or in the room

Bobby: 27:31

or right? I'm saying when you're designated to be the person that's in the room? Yeah.

Jim: 27:36

Yes. If they wanted you there, you should be there.

Bobby: 27:38

I don't know. I I had a conversation. My mom was like, Listen, I don't know if I can be there when you're dying. Like, I don't know. I think it's it's, it's like I don't want but then I think about it. When I'm dying. I want people to be there. I'd be terrified. You're gonna want somebody who I put some profile on me and call them night and

The Miz: 27:56

though they don't use around and be like too much for me. Because I don't want to a person who just remind me that like I'm leaving them. Whereas I'm just in my hours.

Jim: 28:06

How about a person? person? One person? Yes. I'm saying person. Not people like a group of people. No, but even a person.

Bobby: 28:16

So if my mom is dying, yeah,

Jim: 28:18

you're her person. And she did that you're there. Yeah, like, Are you the only one available like if your sister can't come in or bla bla bla bla bla. I was there are a lot of times people whole entire families can't even show up. People die alone.

Bobby: 28:34

families can't be there. Everybody dies alone. It's true.

Jim: 28:38

I'm using dumb phrases. I'm asking you specific questions. Why wouldn't you stand by your mom? If she requests

Bobby: 28:44

because I'm really scared of the death process seeing death like I still appeal. You'll feel better once you see it. Maybe that's what it is. Maybe it's just

The Miz: 28:51

like, it's fine. But I understand that like she'd want my hair but like

Bobby: 28:58

we work out a plan before

The Miz: 29:01

what if I don't want to see my mom die?

Bobby: 29:04

Right? Like why is that such a bad thing for you not to want to.

Jim: 29:07

It's not bad to not want to see it but I don't want to feel it requests. You got to go you have it'll help

Bobby: 29:12

processor and maybe when you're in that process in that mind space, maybe you want to be there like maybe it changes your Lorenza. But

The Miz: 29:18

as I want it later, then I'll go if I don't,

Jim: 29:21

I guess for grads, but I don't think you should be right or not being there. People's biggest regret is I wish I had been there who I hear it all the time. This is all the time. People family members that I wish had been there I was I was three hours away. I was driving there.

Bobby: 29:36

I wish I had been there. I've heard that too. Like how's the hospital and the

Jim: 29:39

chance to see them but

The Miz: 29:40

that for seifish reasons, right? That's not offensive. That's what I'm thinking.

Jim: 29:44

No, they want to be there for them

The Miz: 29:46

because I feel bad that they're not there. So it's for themselves. It's not offensive

Jim: 29:49

now. It's not for you. It's for the person dying. People who are dying. Their biggest fear is that they're leaving you behind and leaving you unprepared to deal with life. Okay, so you Go there to be with them and tell them I'm going to be okay. So that you feel better after that I know so the die so they will die is better and they'll die and they're at peace knowing that you're gonna be okay. It's not for you.

Bobby: 30:15

Right there isn't one I guess technically you're just it's Elliott.

Jim: 30:20

Maybe you're leaving the dying person in fear as they're dying and said you could have relieved their fear. What if I just could die? Bad consequence? It's just fucking go. Now stop worrying about you and your feelings and go.

The Miz: 30:33

I don't think it's offensive. I think it's a personal choice. Right? I love it that way she

Jim: 30:40

would grow up.

Unknown: 30:45

Yay.

Bobby: 30:46

I'm glad I brought it up. See, I told you I shouldn't have fucking brought that good conversation. I mean, I like okay, it's fine. You keep thinking about the dying I guess. Oh no. Would you rather lick a stranger's condom? Or eat a handful of maggots out of a dead corpse? Probably a stranger's condom. I just don't. What do you say with like a little smile?

Jim: 31:26

I don't know if I could do

The Miz: 31:29

that. Then a maggot out of a dead coral.

Jim: 31:31

magnet. I don't think I don't think

The Miz: 31:33

the only differential is like I i've equivalently licked the non stranger. It's gone. I do want to know like,

Jim: 31:40

the condom use is like in into a man like am I looking poop procedures? Or do I have to look both sides of the truffle butter inside of the condom?

Bobby: 31:49

No, I think the whole thing in your mouth and sock shit around.

Jim: 31:57

I don't know. Maybe I could do the but I'm not sure. Either way. I just close my eyes put in my mouth. Whatever you want to

Bobby: 32:03

think of a condom but

The Miz: 32:05

condom for sure.

Bobby: 32:06

What does a maggot taste like?

Jim: 32:08

Fine. They're good. They grind them up and use them? Yeah, out of a dead kids protein.

Bobby: 32:13

I guess that's where they get them in the trash. Right?

Jim: 32:16

Like they put like, rotting material down and then they eat? Yeah. I'm gonna fucking gag. You're gonna gag on that condom, too.

Bobby: 32:25

I know. Especially with all Anna pissy in the same way. If it's a double use, like he's like, well. Next up

Jim: 32:33

the big wad of syphilis.

Bobby: 32:37

Throw up. Like, what's that? Okay, I'm so grossed out. I

Jim: 32:45

want a better question.

Bobby: 32:46

I have another Oh, would you rather walk in on your parents having sex? Or have them walk in on you having sex? I don't.

Jim: 32:57

I might rather walk in on them and turn around quickly. Like do you

Bobby: 33:00

have to watch them or?

Jim: 33:03

They come see what I'm doing. getting done to me. They will never unsee it.

The Miz: 33:10

I'd rather walk in on them.

Jim: 33:11

Yeah, like I don't want them to see this. This fuzzy getting

Bobby: 33:14

Yeah, cuz that would be it's more horrifying to be the one that's caught. I feel

Jim: 33:17

like they're gonna see Bobby's buff blood on the end of the bed and then get on Go on.

Bobby: 33:20

Oh, like really? With my harness on or something? Which I don't have yet but I want one now. That's

Jim: 33:28

all for birthday weekend in the woods.

Bobby: 33:30

I mean, just for my whole life, not just for your fucking birthday weekend. I know. He's our birthday weekend. Are you multiple people? Are you okay? Yeah, I'm just coming for everyone's Gex today. Coming in your gut.

Jim: 33:47

Your segments over

Bobby: 33:49

now? This is the midsection. Fucking misery. Hi. Hi, we're

The Miz: 34:05

okay. I have two things. One of them's like, not big, but and I kind of already told him about it. But I don't understand why gays need to audio message. I don't understand it. And I've never met anyone else to do it. Besides gay people.

Bobby: 34:25

I actually hate it.

The Miz: 34:27

I don't why?

Bobby: 34:29

Why? Like this is a Jimmy

The Miz: 34:30

talking. I've been talking to some guy on fucking hinge. And I literally it's coming to the point where I am typing up the conversation and he just responds via audio. And I'm like, this is just absurd, lazy due to the literally entire conversation. Just my responses. Well,

Bobby: 34:48

if you're going to record your voice in this fucking call the person that's Yeah, that's even weird. Like, why are you but it is a gay thing where they're just like,

Jim: 34:55

let's send an I'm on Grindr and they just keep sending little clips and I'm like, I bet you have a sexy Voice me your voice do

Bobby: 35:01

they just want to know that

Jim: 35:02

you're like, Why do I have to talk to you? Right? Oh, they're trying to prevent catfishing. Maybe they want to hear your voice back like one or two times. And I'm like, and then I'm like,

Bobby: 35:14

hello.

Jim: 35:15

Here's how I prove I'm real. I tell them I'm like, tell me to make a face or make like a hand motion. And I'll send you a picture right now that like, they'll be like, tongue out peace sign upside down. Gotcha. And then they're like, okay, so it's you. I'm like, yeah,

Bobby: 35:28

is it you? The way you do I'm like Craigslist as you have them write down the time and the date. Picture, but I like that. I never had to deal with that.

Jim: 35:38

You had people use it on you. Oh, are you that Bobby guys? So prove it

Bobby: 35:44

prove it. Let me see the whole

The Miz: 35:47

purpose of the verifying your real but like for just every conversation

Bobby: 35:51

now? Okay, do they stay in the conversation? Or do they disappear?

The Miz: 35:55

I don't even know. I know they disappear.

Bobby: 35:57

That's probably why because they don't want to incriminating themselves.

The Miz: 36:01

I was watching this show. Why?

Unknown: 36:06

Like why?

Bobby: 36:07

They do just like they could say like look at this guy writing me all these fucking he's fucking Kate like if Yeah, I don't know. I guess look at the gays that fucking dipshit to me. Look at what I did to other people. Yeah,

The Miz: 36:18

I'm fucking I'm done with that. Like I not respond.

Jim: 36:22

Audio messages have to stop they have to stop.

The Miz: 36:26

gays everywhere. Stop it. Stop it just stop talking sending audio? To honey. No, but if I want to. In fact, by the time I do get it if you are sending incriminating evidence and if you are talking shit, fine. Yeah, and I would do it too. But if I'm conversing with you about bullshit, like just type it Who the hell cares?

Bobby: 36:48

I have blonde hair. I'm seven inches cut.

Jim: 36:51

I'm unkind. That's incriminating, so you have to do audio. I mean, that's for me earlier I just woke it up. Oh my god. Are you calling public service?

Bobby: 37:05

announcements in the gays

Jim: 37:07

fucker. You're calling me out?

Bobby: 37:09

Why wouldn't I? Oh my god. I mean, oh my god. This that's why I'm just making it clear that that goes for you too, though. No, it does. I'm

Jim: 37:19

outside the rules. Oh,

The Miz: 37:20

okay. I will make an exception for if you actually want to stay in something musically. Yeah, that's fun. The key can be through via like texting. You can't be sitting here watching TV. my cat's meow. Like I shut the fuck up. No,

Bobby: 37:37

but they are the extra long messages to some long ones where you're like, I don't remember what to say back because they asked so many questions that

The Miz: 37:46

I'm talking about are just stupid little things that you could easily type

Bobby: 37:50

ready? I like to work out on Mondays

The Miz: 37:53

like like, Oh, hey, like how are you doing? I'm fucking weird. That seems like more work. I'm sick of it. And if you send me a voice message I'm done with Yeah, I

Bobby: 38:02

wonder if it's a practice to say like, oh, that didn't sound sexy enough. I'm five seven.

Jim: 38:06

Well that it's like if you're gonna delete it and re record like, what just type? Like an

Bobby: 38:12

original thing. Just be yourself. Thank you, Bobby. You're so

The Miz: 38:18

like a normal fucking person in bunch of fucking games. Like I'm so sick of bed.

Bobby: 38:23

I'm sick of no iMessage more

The Miz: 38:27

rain, like

Jim: 38:31

worse on audio? actually worse. Yeah, that's worse. Yeah. And if I can't FaceTime you,

Bobby: 38:36

would you rather have have somebody leave a voice messages for you? Or voice message? I got the green box

Jim: 38:43

voice message. Yeah, yeah, I'd rather just listen. I don't I can't agree box. I

Bobby: 38:47

ruins everything. And then when if you're in a group so like, like to like, I'm like, why am I getting a text every day? Why am I gonna text forever?

The Miz: 38:58

There will be no group text with Android users.

Bobby: 39:01

I agree with that. They should honestly be kicked out or have like, what? Yeah, kik app. No, I'm not gonna

The Miz: 39:07

get the hell out of here. I could never talk to you Ganymede just as fucking happy. Fucking Hey, everybody. I'm not actually a fan. So that was the first fucking met on hinge is now sending me audio messages and I'm just gonna have to stop responding.

Bobby: 39:23

I like the comment that that person said about one of the Instagrams or something.

The Miz: 39:35

He's like, are you on the Instagram? As my grandma says, I'm like, No, I need like, I need someone like like, like, who has my fucking like arsenic like, I need to go like this is so fucking bad. Like, I hate my first interaction. This is what I'm dealing with. Like I can't Honey, why honey, so that was that. Basically I hate the gays. Can I just Okay, I got into like a really dark place on Friday nights.

Jim: 40:04

Okay, were you this one? you texted me? I'm sorry.

The Miz: 40:08

No, and I texted you I was sobbing hanging over the toilet.

Jim: 40:12

I thought you were you said you were folding clothes in your closet.

The Miz: 40:15

But I would definitely over my toilet. I get the receipt as

Unknown: 40:21

that receipt of the receipts.

Jim: 40:24

So why are you in a dark place?

The Miz: 40:26

No, I was in a dark place because I had I had gotten some drinks, whatever. And I was planning my, my binge for the night very strategically around when I was going to have the most caloric beverage for purposes of purging. Right,

Jim: 40:42

totally. I've done that. Yes. Right.

Bobby: 40:47

So relatable and have no

The Miz: 40:48

okay, but then I place my order

Jim: 40:55

around purging. I'm just like, Oh, I get it. Totally. Yeah, definitely honey

The Miz: 41:01

related law. I place my order and like the window comes like me. Okay, great. It's gonna show up. I'm just finishing my like, how

Jim: 41:11

narrow is the window?

Bobby: 41:13

Okay, so that's a 30.

Jim: 41:15

Yeah. 30.

The Miz: 41:16

When in from starting to when you actually go to do it, it should be 10 minutes

Jim: 41:21

up. That's a narrow window, bitch.

The Miz: 41:23

All right. So when my drink was ending, the food was supposed to arrive. I'll get flushed. I mean, the drinks, you kind of have to like take some sort of like hair cut on it. Like, you know, you're probably gonna retain most of it. But I don't want to throw up my alcohol. Why not?

Bobby: 41:41

Because then leaves your system.

The Miz: 41:42

So then you go to bed. Nobody wants to be drunk,

Bobby: 41:45

right? Want to be drunk?

The Miz: 41:47

I mean, that's the thing, too. But

Bobby: 41:49

yeah, but you know what I think what's in your blood. You can also just just let it soak in there for 10 minutes

The Miz: 41:53

wrong thrown up on less sugary drinks, which is

Bobby: 41:58

drunk on life. I was like what the

Jim: 42:01

Christian now?

The Miz: 42:03

It comes time from when this order is supposed to get here. And it's not here. And I'm like, on grubhub like chatting with people and like, they're just like not being helpful. Customer Service.

Unknown: 42:13

Yeah.

The Miz: 42:15

And they're like, Oh, my God, like it's not here. Yeah, I'm sorry. Like they're closed. Sounds like they're closed. So now I'm gonna have to start a whole new order throughout. Like not only was it late, it was not coming. So it totally derail a plan. So I like slammed my fucking fist down on my desk, and my whole drink spilled all over my laptop. Oh. All over app. So I had to get a new laptop already at my new job. I'm not actually a fan.

Bobby: 42:44

That's fine. What did you say? Oh, they're like this reeks of alcohol. You're like, No, it's just rubbing alcohol. I

The Miz: 42:51

didn't I haven't done the old one in yet.

Jim: 42:55

You need to drop it in a bag of rice. Tequila.

The Miz: 43:02

And then I I forced like the grubhub customer service rep to stay on the line with me until the other order got here. It's like no, I'm not letting you go. You need to stay here until it gets here. until they get here because I've no fucking patience for when shit goes wrong. And no one can tell me.

Bobby: 43:18

We should reenact this right now like I should.

Jim: 43:23

Customer Service Agent rating them for a 10 minute delay.

Bobby: 43:30

Then can they cancel on the client?

Jim: 43:32

At 10 minutes? You were immediately like it's not here. And they're like, Oh no, give it another 10 minutes. Okay,

The Miz: 43:37

nope. I was berating that. Oh, I'm sorry. And it's not their fault, but it's true. I had to get my anger out.

Jim: 43:44

We have had food deliveries here where we're like, okay, it's been an extra hour. All we need now is for the food to arrive. Like literally please send the food please. Or like

Bobby: 43:53

I'm sorry like we don't have a job. Yeah, Tom.

The Miz: 44:01

I hate them. They gave me a free meal. So

Jim: 44:06

Karen to me one less laptop?

The Miz: 44:08

I'm such I'm such a Karen on one. Yeah, you've

Jim: 44:14

retained all your meal.

The Miz: 44:16

Well, no, the meal had not come yet

Jim: 44:19

or the drink me drink the drink. Yeah, the drinks was I

Bobby: 44:22

received all your bloods so then he had to wake up and swim laps and

The Miz: 44:26

well now the next It was so bad because the next day I went to fucking dog birthday and ate everything inside. Wow, what birthdays people

Jim: 44:35

have New York dogs.

Bobby: 44:38

I heard that right. But I was like, I mean, actually, on Broad City. There's an episode where they got the dog's wedding or something anyway. Yeah, customer service is tough because sometimes I'll have to like help people out here we go. When customers get mad. I'll be like, Hi, what's going on in there? Whoa, my Hey, how can I help you? Hey, it's Bobby. Mike. What's

The Miz: 44:56

up you fat bag or the fox my office. Let

Bobby: 44:59

me know If I need to look into that, I'm like wait, I'm sorry I look I don't know what's going on. I'm gonna have to like look into that for you but I'll get right back with you

Jim: 45:07

in four days, but then people

Bobby: 45:09

get like when people get kind of nasty with me like I'll get you turn it upon I get a little nasty back I'm like, Well, if you want me to find out what's going on, I can do that. But in order to do that, I have to hang up the phone or like you know, I like Conti that's why

The Miz: 45:25

I never call because when I'm chatting I can request them to send me a transcript of it they're nasty to me I have it

Bobby: 45:31

and and also you can control your emotions almost better without like, cuz sometimes your way or eight people are going to be like fuck you. I'm sorry. But like if you're texting you have time to think okay, how can I legally Yeah, manipulate, you know, eloquent same thing manipulate customer service. I'm really sorry to have to go through that.

Jim: 45:53

But I just I'm trying to figure out how that relates to you sobbing into the toilet

The Miz: 45:58

because the next time I or the previous time I was having a similar moment I was sobbing into the toilet What about the closet? I don't really know what the closet came from but a moment over the toilet goes really poorly if it doesn't come out and then you're just there with it oscillating you and you're just like thought

Bobby: 46:19

like what am I doing? You have that moment where you're like

The Miz: 46:22

I don't know I'm like why didn't that come up?

Bobby: 46:26

When you throw up do you take put up the girl seat too? Yeah girl seat the girls throw

Jim: 46:35

normal sit down on the girl see like twice a day

Bobby: 46:39

what else somebody said and I just did it myself. Oh, that I'll call the female a girl Yeah, but you never say about a man a boy you never call him a boy

Jim: 46:47

no no yeah. That girl over there and you're like the woman over there or that female presenting person over there Bobby's like don't take it too far.

Bobby: 46:59

I'm already feeling republican woman either I told I was told I was on plenty of fish or some Republicans you are which kind of makes sense for the two guys. Just they are

Jim: 47:09

Yeah, and they are alright that was there in show business baby. Ah

Bobby: 47:21

Guess what? Question Time No. Word of the Week.

Unknown: 47:27

Oh, I'm

Bobby: 47:28

ready. Ready for the word? Pereira sorry Ms. Do you want to make a suggestion well we should put in this fucking time slide

Jim: 47:39

slot I was not provided I'm slide

Bobby: 47:42

not provided what you would rather in this in this spy was provided

The Miz: 47:46

an intelligible question just then.

Bobby: 47:48

Well, I wasn't provided an answer. And then whatever answers you fucking intangible

Jim: 48:00

it's intangible entendre floating around in the air. Oh, this question is just hanging out in the in the ether for this phrase, and

Unknown: 48:11

he might get appropriate

Jim: 48:18

marry a feminine name used as a substitute for a gay man's given name used with affection, ridicule, or familiarity by another gay man. Or it's a popular greeting or salutation used by gay men to address other gay men they believe to be more feminine. Like, hey, Mary, how's it going? Calm down Mary teabag and marry. Why is that on there? I don't really know. Gee, pack him marry you a feminine little very little thing and get your balls out and rub them in his face. Mary? Yes. I mean, what? But otherwise, that's a good definition. Yes. So

Bobby: 48:54

I've been hearing people say it though. Like it's it's coming back. I think it's coming back. So in case you ever hear any gay says they call somebody a marry. I don't think it's a bad thing necessarily.

Jim: 49:08

It's kind of like bland ridicule. So

Bobby: 49:10

it's gonna be saying, hey, it's like a bag. Right? That's kind of what makes you think of Hey, Mary, but

Jim: 49:16

yeah, maybe like people you don't know. It could be a little offensive. You're like, Oh, this Mary. You walk into the bar. You're like this fucking mega

The Miz: 49:22

has to do with like the connotation like, like, like your donation on it. It's going to determine what it means.

Jim: 49:28

Hey, Mary, Mary enough. Mary and yeah, we're like hanging out drinking and I mean, a little Mary. I mean to rubble, Mary and that's what I would say I'm in trouble I reached for someone's dick. Mary, Mary.

Bobby: 49:44

So yeah, that's the word of the week. Yeah. More, you know, with Jim Oh, hi, Mary. Hey, Mayor.

Jim: 50:04

Hey mare. Oh, that was so bad. Just got it. Okay. All right. So this week on the Maui now,

Bobby: 50:17

as you saw because you have no idea what the more you know I just thought of something. Has anybody been bothering you've been on a bothering streak? Are we ending that tonight? Or today? No,

Jim: 50:26

I have a lot of things bothering me but something that like happened to me the past week. First we'll do the bothering and then we'll do things that are like a revelation so we can now okay. The thing that's bothering me continued from last week when I went to a dinner I think last Thursday night just a regular fun little DinDin and clearly plastic surgery arised woman was sitting next to me and she's like, looking over starts chatting with my friend huge tits massive lips that were just like, how do you even close them? And then the cheeks horrifying but so

Bobby: 51:09

bad job there.

Jim: 51:11

I'm not even I love plastic surgery, but I'm like, at some point. It's just to Mary, Mary. So she's like talking to me and then like it comes up like obviously we're in the short north where a lot of shootings have been. She's talking about all the shootings and she was a bartender at one point there was a shooting that the cops covered up and so she started telling me some horrifying stories about that where there have been like five extra shootings we haven't heard about. And the cops will say like a table fell over and hit the cement floor. Like at monarch at seesaw all these bars up and down have had shootings fulshear we didn't hear about them. Anyways, then she starts talking about COVID

Bobby: 51:47

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Jim: 51:49

I was having a nice dinner and she starts going in on Oh, wow. I don't even believe in COVID Do you like really believe in it? And I'm like, believe in it. Yeah, I believe in a bitch. And I'm just like, okay, yeah, I do. And then I'm talking about like, people I know who've died bla bla bla bla bla, she's just like, oh really like here in Columbus. But were they like, at sort of back in the whole like, you know, I call it are people deserve to die. People with health conditions deserve to die. And I'm just staring at her and then like, right, she's sorry, she said something like that. And I was like, that's actually not how it works anymore. But she brought up the vaccine. This is the part where I had to move inside to a table inside and I said I was cold to leave. And I was actually polite about it should have been right. She called it looks like 90 degrees. Chilly. She goes, Oh, the vaccine. I don't put anything fake in my body. Um, I just stared at her. I looked around and was like, Oh, I don't know. You know where your cheeks are from? China, China. A cadaver you know where your lips are from? a cow's knees. Right like cartilage just came from there. I don't know. I

Bobby: 53:02

think it's really funny because that is the double standard right now. You don't know what the fuck? I'm gonna go smoke a cigarette

Jim: 53:07

sheets. Yep.

Bobby: 53:08

But I'm not getting the vaccine. I'm not

Jim: 53:12

faking my body. No, I'm like you put formaldehyde in your body every time you breathe in a cigarette. But okay. So that happened. That was my pissed off moment of the week grinding my gears, crying. The revelation was just yet another revelation of how old I am. And I think Bobby can relate. So I'm at I'm at my family's like house. We're having fun. I brought up like my stepson and one of his friends came up. So you know, we're having a grand old time. We're only in like jet skiing, boating, blah, blah, blah. Well, they went over with me to another island, we like ferried over to an island. And someone gave them shots. Not me. Someone else or somebody random? someone knows someone I knew by Oh, they had a couple shots there.

Unknown: 54:07

What are you? What do you

Bobby: 54:10

miss? His face just now killed me. I don't know why.

Jim: 54:12

I know. He's like, can't they handle their liquor? A couple shots. Are they getting ready to parties as a pregame So okay, so they're feeling those because they're too young. I'm like, we got to go home. So we go home. I let them like walk over to the lakefront. Well, turns out there was like a wedding going on. And there's other random people watching the wedding trying to crash the wedding. And they like started talking and hanging out with these like 19 to 21 year olds. Well, by the time I got over there to see like what they were doing the 1921 year olds were handing shots out of their pocket like those pre package shot. Oh my god. Oh, no, you're talking about giving them like tubes? Yes. Like the ones that are just like you can buy at a gas station or like the little shop sized so they had those. So basically, they're drunk at this point. I was like, Okay, well, now I'm responsible for you like what's going on? We got to go home, but like, as we're walking home, you know, they've been We're saying things like, oh, like I feel invincible and I Baba bah. And so it took me back to like when we started drinking. I'm wondering what your first drinking experience was like we were drunk drunk. Do

Bobby: 55:10

you even remember? Yeah, unfortunately, I do.

Jim: 55:12

What happened?

Bobby: 55:14

I was 17.

Jim: 55:15

Yep, that's right. That's right. Were there.

Bobby: 55:18

I drank like a half a bottle of tequila. How's it clairvaux though, so I'm sure that's trashy to miss but it was classy to this senior. In high school. You just look at me like I'm crazy senior in high school.

Jim: 55:31

I was like, do you have your golden Buckeye card?

Bobby: 55:34

Not citizen and I basically wanted to suck my friend Courtney's toes. Okay. That was my and I hate fee chaser. Like a little salt. I have no idea but that was like the big thing I was. I was like, being stupid. So I'm like, I remember man, and then be like, I'm gonna second inch. How's Illa

The Miz: 55:56

I made that with my friend Alyssa drunk like on a mattress and grab it like rubbing her Ted's. Oh, Mike doesn't have a drinking party. And my friend Mike was like, oh, I'll bring over like kalua bring over tequila. Bring over vodka. I'll bring over rum. And then he shows up with one water bottle. I'm like, I thought you were gonna bring other things like I got all in here.

Bobby: 56:16

A CD like twisted tornado. You know,

The Miz: 56:20

disgusting and everyone threw a ball in my basement. This is it. This is it. Yeah, I'm this way. My dad was upstairs watching like the Steelers. And uh, no idea. It was amazing.

Jim: 56:30

It was like a high school party. I let go in the basement and they were just be like water bottles everywhere. Like it's hot guy. Yeah. It kind of like, okay, I'll drink vodka out of a plastic water bottle. It's just but it's like Do you remember feeling like invincible or like you could do anything? Oh, yeah. Crazy things because that's how they were acting and I was like, Oh, we will be so darling. I need to have a chat with well, invincible.

Bobby: 56:53

No, that's something that's that's something that takes a while for people

Jim: 56:57

to diagnosing them. Yeah, I was wondering. Gosh, I

Bobby: 56:59

don't know if I just did that show me ma'am.

Jim: 57:04

So I can I paint a picture of Ms. Right now is eating sunflower seeds just nine away she wouldn't go. You're literally like look like a baseball player eating sunflower

Bobby: 57:13

seeds. Your spit and Deb ever dipped? Yeah.

Jim: 57:18

Yeah, that was I threw up immediately.

Bobby: 57:20

I just like the smell of it. I didn't really like the taste was it like really salty

Jim: 57:24

and like burns it basically cut your lip

Bobby: 57:26

open and then you'd always see like crack live and I like I can we do a Dr. Pepper bottle there spitting it in.

Jim: 57:33

I can't. But yeah, so that was kind of my thing where I realized I was like, I'm a little older than this. Like I don't have that feeling anymore when I drink I'm just feeling normal now when I drink

The Miz: 57:43

like more I feel powerless when I drink. I yeah,

Jim: 57:47

like I need to just sit down

The Miz: 57:48

a piece of garbage and the entire room.

Jim: 57:50

Right? They were like excited. I'm like, I miss that feeling. I

Bobby: 57:53

don't feel like a piece of garbage. I drink I feel like I still feel like I have a little touch and

Jim: 57:59

you feel like that all the time. Drunk

Bobby: 58:01

garbage. Oh, no, I don't I don't give a fuck anymore. I

The Miz: 58:06

know I get the night I graduated high school I worked at a lake me my friends were trash and we had an idea to go unclip this raft and our Lake like a lifeguard on and we were pissed at it so we've sent it out into sea

Bobby: 58:19

Oh my god. I love that sex such as but that's such a that's where you think oh there's no consequences you have

The Miz: 58:25

like we had like wire cutters and shit like we were like full on just out you go I'm not fucking guarding this raft anyone that was some 37 year olds raft that was like just trying to make a hard living trying to turn

Jim: 58:36

on

The Miz: 58:36

it was a town property.

Bobby: 58:38

Oh my god. They had like put on a search for you guys. Yeah, you might get into like teenagers were drinking.

The Miz: 58:43

We were just like no cuz we worked out so we came out and discovered it. We're like, ah,

Unknown: 58:46

someone cut the round you.

Bobby: 58:49

Oh my god, you shady little. Again. That's shady boys black boys. Boy, what I really remember is my first cigarette head.

Jim: 59:01

Uh huh. Well, that's I was like,

Bobby: 59:03

I know I used to I used to work on the golf course. And we there was a tournament that we get like shot little baby shots or like beer, we would be able to take it home and there was a pack in the head of Parliament's and so I decided one day that I was going to just smoke at this smell. And I was so fucked up like dizzy and I

Jim: 59:23

Exactly. You're like, wow. That is how I feel when I go muster up as well with a cigarette.

Bobby: 59:30

And I was like, what's happening to me? And I was like shaking. I had no idea. What is this? So that was like worse for me than the alcohol like that. But then That's right. That's the addiction immediately, like well, if I do this again, I won't shake anymore. I won't feel dizzy. Oh, let me do it again. And you did it. And again and again and again. But when I did hookah like I didn't feel good. I felt a mess though. But it felt cleaner. Yeah, I guess because it's straight up because it was like real. Yeah, it's the six chemicals that are rolled together. Wow.

Jim: 1:00:00

That's creepy meow. Yeah that feeling thinking of that feeling well I just want our listeners to weigh in on this our Parliament cigarettes used by cocaine users because my friend who uses Parliament's was like oh, watch this and flipped it over and like the there's a little indent from where the upper end of the filter Yeah, he's like you can scoop whatever you need in there.

Bobby: 1:00:21

And I'm like, that's not what I thought it was. What was it for? was just like it was just like a fun little It was no,

Jim: 1:00:27

I think it's to scoop drugs. People are doing drugs. Bobby, people are doing drugs. I heard Joe raags I'm old. My birthday. Oh, yeah, I can't believe it. And kratts puppy gangs.

Unknown: 1:00:44

More you know. Final Thoughts final count.

Bobby: 1:00:57

Another another segment that Ms. hates? Yeah. You know, you heard that you heard her episode. You should know now why this all has to happen.

Jim: 1:01:06

Right? Because a month ago, I learned what a final thought was and so now we're progressing. I want to show his final thought you have to go first, Bobby because you never go first.

Bobby: 1:01:15

That's so true. Wow, I'm being attacked. I

Jim: 1:01:20

learned your 37 we're attacking yo.

Bobby: 1:01:23

My final thought is try to remember your youth as much as you can. But also know where you are now, and appreciate the journey that got you here.

The Miz: 1:01:36

That's actually what my final thought is. 40 approach 40 as you approach 40 try to limit giving unsolicited fatherly advice. Oh my God. That was kind of neat.

Bobby: 1:01:56

happens. truth hurts. Wow, man. Great. What's yours?

Jim: 1:02:03

My final thought is always always try to put yourself in another person's shoes whether they're on their deathbed or young and drunk and happy. Just remember, it's not about you.

Bobby: 1:02:19

Okay, that kind of really big tag on mine.

The Miz: 1:02:24

A good final thought from an unlikely source

Bobby: 1:02:28

your final thought is over pitch. You don't get a set know your thoughts bullshit because your final fight was to rebuttal mine. Now it's true that

Jim: 1:02:38

that was a good final thought.

Bobby: 1:02:40

Oh, all the time. Not just in show. Yeah, all the time. Okay, I won't give any advice. Thank God I'm not actually a fan

The Miz: 1:02:49

I didn't say your name. That's true.

Bobby: 1:02:51

I'm the only one that's the father around here to fucking crazy Mary's who marries women around how am I supposed to keep off

Jim: 1:03:01

teabag Mary why is that an example I've

Bobby: 1:03:06

shot shaggy Mater I had to I had to clear my layer next layer

Jim: 1:03:15

is that a body burner What?

Bobby: 1:03:18

my esophagus and you know

Jim: 1:03:19

Dr. Seuss wrote about the last layer next layer.

Bobby: 1:03:26

Anyway anyway well, thanks for listening. Oh, by the way I don't know what's gonna happen next week we're still in the thoughts of it but Ms is taking off rash on his airplane fly I'm literally gonna crash on my airplane I'm gonna feel so bad I'm going to battle for the recording but like well guys

Jim: 1:03:43

least we can skip the deathbed

Bobby: 1:03:46

permission the skinny death next was like spread you somewhere nevermind i don't want to give advice where you should we scrub

The Miz: 1:03:55

correct mountains of muck my body will be nice and spread in the crashing spot. I'm going to get it.

Bobby: 1:04:01

Oh my god. We're the size of a fucking toothpick so there's not much to get. There's like two specks of dust like oh, this was his tours and here's Bobby

The Miz: 1:04:11

would be the biggest compliment ever as no one can find my desk that was just a skinny. Right?

Jim: 1:04:16

These ashes are like a volcano erupt. We

Bobby: 1:04:18

found Bobby. We found a little bit of gem but Ms. He was unpredictable. he floated away to happen.

Jim: 1:04:31

Cigarette in the bathroom of the aircraft. lighting the fire that blows up the play. No, he

Bobby: 1:04:37

tries to turn the bubbles watch this massive rant bro. I can't. This song is so cool. But yeah, Mears is doing comedy in LA so I mean, he knows I am as well. I'm not Actually, man Oh, this is what he's talking about. Here we go right in the closet. Here we go. The closets back. So Ms won't be here next week, but that's okay. He didn't quit again. Again we're yeah you know again there might be like a after next week I call us and be like,

The Miz: 1:05:20

I fucking hate everything I hate interchain ever doing comedy again?

Bobby: 1:05:25

Me well because he's really good. Exactly. So go check them out in LA I'll give you the links All right. No

Unknown: 1:05:33

thanks Are you fucking fat yet? Thank you for listening to another episode of She's Not Doing So Well? Leave a message with questions or comments at 669-207-4643 Don't forget to subscribe and check out our links in the podcast description of this episode. These information will be expressed when she's closing opposition of ingredients this has been a house of bread production