That's Hot (Casinos, Cooking with Paris Hilton, Birthday Binge, Bathhouse)

Unknown: 0:00

I'm telling you right now 90s babies is gonna catch you because it's caught the 80s baby and we're going out here my brother's like we can't go to another bar. I can't go to two bars in one night he's born in 81 he was just laying up on a picnic table sobbing his eyes. My brother has to wear a knee brace to the bar Fernanda call my mom to come get us and stuff me my fiance, my brother to stay in and outside. My mom rose up in a van like freshman year home call me welcome.

Bobby: 0:28

She's Not Doing So Well. Comedy podcast featuring Bobby. I don't want to be viral. I want to be inspirational and life changing. Because Listen, I'm at a GE

Jim: 0:42

gym at the top. What can I say? Finally he's just like you can unfollow me if you don't like my body. Gomez. Oh my God tell me all about it. You're right, but you look at mushroom shape. You cut me off or you cut me off Dr. Michael de black in New York. What I thought I love him and I want to have sex with

Bobby: 1:10

him. Hello everybody. Welcome to another episode of She's Not Doing So Well. I'm Bobby I'm jam balls on my mouth. That sounded like oh, that's creepy. Those two tiny little old man and I was a fat neck and a big fat magnetic casino. I screwed on over here and get my refill. Shari Shami Oh, Shannon? Already a full

Jim: 1:35

bucking disaster. All right. Have you 100 Oh my god. I'm not that old.

Bobby: 1:40

Yeah, no. You are. So last

Jim: 1:44

weekend. hit hard. hard and fast. Oh, that's already on to the next year. How are we on 100 already though? Like, let's be real. You know what the kids this is your real two years. Two years of hard work hard work and also not hard work. And look where we're at. At the same place we started. I'm not actually a fan. I'm sorry. There's a festival. There's a random festival

Bobby: 2:05

in my backyard. Not in like my backyard. But the basically the backyard basically the backyard. I got home I thought I thought my neighbor Jackie was like in her pool like, living her best life. I was like,

Jim: 2:16

early 90s. Yeah. And I was like,

Bobby: 2:18

okay, like, and then I was like, Oh, that's not Jackie. And it was it was raining so I would get a pool but that's what I thought. Well, that's

Jim: 2:24

what I thought when I got out of my car. I was like, oh, Bobby is bumping in. I'm not telling you're grilling in the backyard. We're in the hot tub.

Bobby: 2:30

We are marshmallows. I've been drinking coffee. I've been drinking coffee. So yeah, I'm just gonna go right into my segment. bareback with row weekly. bareback with Bobby is brought to you by Trojan. What is it? Just kidding. What are those? What

Jim: 3:01

is our Trojan?

Unknown: 3:03

Hi. Hi. So we're coming into your guy.

Bobby: 3:07

You know, I missed a spot that I wanted to say something but I'm gonna say it now.

Jim: 3:12

I believe in you.

Bobby: 3:13

I have a crush on one of our listeners. It's a European crush.

Jim: 3:18

Oh, wait, what I was like is Justin European. Oh, just you know, Justin, I was like backpack that

Bobby: 3:25

add fat cock. That backpack

Jim: 3:26

is welcome in Ohio.

Bobby: 3:29

No, I would like to say hello to Jake Warren. He added us on our Instagram and I like went through his pictures and he says he listens to us on the monitors over there. The louver what is over there? The museum? Oh, I don't know if I listen to is the most famous Museum in the world. Hi, gay. Yeah, I don't know what I just told. The wide web looks in London. A tube. Maybe the tube? I like that guy too. Well, I don't know what he said exactly what he said he rode some train and it's like crazy people are on there. Yeah. So when he bursts out in laughter. I was like, that's so sweet of you to say and he's hot. No. Yeah, I

Jim: 4:07

know. So I've been messaging him which I'm sure you've been creepily reading mono. I

Bobby: 4:11

creepily know that you were probably gonna message him because you're a whore. God and can't make a horn to a housewife. Well,

Jim: 4:22

I know. Only house. Oh, you can't? Wait, what's worse, or why? I thought horse charge money. And hosers Yeah, I feel like I'm a How

Bobby: 4:33

are you a whore? I don't charge money. I'm charged money. Just time.

Jim: 4:38

You can ride this stick for free.

Bobby: 4:40

Oh my god. Is that what the differences between a horse

Jim: 4:42

and horses are like they are professional. They're the smart ones. Yeah, but,

Bobby: 4:46

but they're doing one soul. Okay, I didn't know I guess because you're doing sex work. So that's supposed to be shameful. Yeah, we we all don't liberate the sex workers. Um, because everybody's looking at the porns right but he's looking porn. porns and Yeah, they are such

Jim: 5:02

they are and maps and what's your favorite date?

Bobby: 5:04

I just want to say that hello to our European listeners. There's a few things I need to talk about. I had a birthday bender.

Jim: 5:12

You I was concerned for your health.

Bobby: 5:16

Yeah, like by the time you saw me, I was like, Hi, I'm doing great. Well, here's the thing. So I went to Union on Thursday, which is Long Island Thursday, it's got famous night cut out.

Jim: 5:29

Describe the union drink.

Bobby: 5:31

A union drink is like all alcohol to the very top and a squirt of whatever mixer. And these long islands are fucking deadly. They're deadly. You know,

Jim: 5:44

I've had a few and my,

Bobby: 5:47

I've had a few of my,

Jim: 5:48

let's just say after two of them in one night, you're pretty much the nights over. So I had to

Bobby: 5:53

hope and I know I'm like a little bit bigger. But then I went to truth which is like a very strong

Jim: 5:58

person IPA after two. Okay, and then three, but lights to cap

Bobby: 6:02

that off. And I was like, This is the greatest I apparently even Michael was like, You were like in your elements. I was like, Oh, hey, but like just talking everybody. I at one point, I was telling the gen Z's to get the fuck out of the I was like, sorry, Gen Z's. I'm really sorry. Sorry, Gen Z's. And they were like, it's fine girl. And I'm like,

Jim: 6:19

trying to walk past them. Cuz you're like, I'm about to be 37. Like, Hi, I'm 37 they're different.

Bobby: 6:25

They're different. Gen Z

Jim: 6:26

is a whole different. You're

Bobby: 6:27

kind of cool. I caught her vibe.

Jim: 6:29

I'm into it.

Bobby: 6:30

But it also like, put stickers on the back of the toilet instead of cocaine. So like, we don't do stickers anymore. We don't do stickers. We don't do cocaine. We do ketamine. That is the big thing. Now it's ketamine. Like

Jim: 6:41

everyone. Everyone's in a K hole.

Bobby: 6:43

Everybody isn't a kid. I think we all are in K. I'm trying to climb out of my own k hole. I'm in an eight hole.

Jim: 6:52

Okay, so you've had like 18 drinks the equivalent of eight.

Bobby: 6:54

Yeah, but I was living my life apparently. Wow.

Jim: 6:57

Yeah, it was great. And your partner's just trying to babysit

Bobby: 7:01

sort of usually I'm the one that's like, let's go home and like get cozy and cuddle. Oh, we ordered a pizza. It got their attend. We didn't get home until like one o'clock. Yeah, I was like, just leave it Mike. One more beer, please. It was the last night of my life because I was just

Jim: 7:17

here last night out. At this age. You don't go out a lot. There's no bar for old people. All right. Then we proceeded to get

Bobby: 7:24

home heat up the old pizza that was sitting on the front porch, watch some big brother. And then we pass it on the couch where the dog then ate the table. More good. So she cuz she was pissed that we were out all night. We got up and went to bed. And that was the start. It was four o'clock. And I'm like, okay, so it's

Jim: 7:41

not even your birthday. Not even my birthday. I love that song. So like you woke up before and with a hard deck in your hand. Oh, that's true.

Bobby: 7:49

Yes. My partner wanted me to hold just hold and

Jim: 7:53

just told it not written sleep. That's interesting. I

Bobby: 7:56

know. It's weird looking back on it. I thought that's kind of weird. But also, I don't really care. It is what it is. So I had a bender then me and you go where?

Jim: 8:05

Me and you, you and I go to the casino and that.

Unknown: 8:09

Oh boy.

Bobby: 8:09

Can we please just talk about that for just a second.

Jim: 8:12

Okay, so like on Friday on Friday. I'm like, I'm coming over. We're gonna do something fun. I'm like, I know you're hung over and probably still blacked out. But I'm ready.

Bobby: 8:24

Ready to go.

Jim: 8:25

I worked all day. But I was like, I'm ready.

Bobby: 8:27

So I took an edible Hellboy. And then I think I tried to have a drink. And it was like not that successful. But I was definitely getting high. I would say so then I got to week I got like I just was only one that we went to the casino Michael drove drove it Oh my god. I am Michael troves falling apart as we literally

Jim: 8:45

drove did like a minute ago,

Bobby: 8:47

fishbowl right now.

Jim: 8:49

And I'm a cat Paulina, you. Me, Gao, Gao puppy. So, basically, I've never been in a casino. I don't even know where it is. And it's in the we can't say the G word anymore. Really? appropriate but it's area. rougher area.

Bobby: 9:06

rougher area. Definitely

Jim: 9:08

rough. Yeah. And yeah, it's just like I wouldn't drive there on my own.

Bobby: 9:13

It's really scary in the parking lot. I wonder if it's like that every casino or just this? Cuz I feel like there's like kind of a weird like, Is somebody gonna murder me if I win money? Like I always think someone's watching me like the FBI is there there's like a mafia there like there's all these different like heroes. Yeah, just watching you and waiting for you to make a bad move. And then you walk into the fucking place

Jim: 9:33

and it's a giant donut shaped I mean, I literally I was lost.

Bobby: 9:37

Oh, all these lights here like oh, mine what the mirrors on the ceilings and like, you can't tell where you are. No, and that's that's I'm I'm lost.

Jim: 9:45

I'm like, Oh, I just saw these machines. No way. These are different. Oh, no, no. Oh, wait, these tables?

Bobby: 9:50

Is this a restaurant? Right? And you're like, wait, I thought I just saw these. No, I didn't. Where am I? Yeah, it's pretty bad. That's how people get stuck in there. They do loops and loops and loops and loops. And I did that all night. Yeah. And so did I and we drank and we lay out some money. We took out some money you won. You won and lost the same I

Jim: 10:09

took out 200 last 150 then put the remaining 50 on the roulette table and got back to 100 which is amazing, which I can justify cuz I'm like, 100 I would spend that at the bar, like any night. I know not all 100 but food bar, you know, party excetera at SATs ra cetera definitely YouTubers. You add it all up. I spent 100 when you go out, it's it's crazy. So I don't feel like it was fun to be at the casino. It was very strange, like describe the people. There.

Bobby: 10:41

There's like a there's a couple of classification,

Jim: 10:43

I would say like the tooth to person ratio is like one to 100 not actually like one to 100 I mean, a lot of teeth. Not not. It was ridiculous. And I'm not here to make fun of people who can't afford dental care or anything like that. I'm just saying. It's definitely not the cream of the crop.

Bobby: 11:02

I mean, is that appropriate? I don't care. It's not. It's not because they're all uglies. I'm sorry. And I guess I was there. So my ugly. There

Jim: 11:09

were a lot of people who looked like they hadn't moved in a while and were just like, wheeling around in wheelchairs.

Bobby: 11:14

And a lot of people stationed station stations have been there for a year. Yeah, like, you can just tell they've molded to this. Like, oh, okay, Cheryl.

Jim: 11:23

Have you been to the bathroom in a while?

Bobby: 11:25

I just, I don't. I can't. It's better in Vegas. A Yep. But be like, it's five in there. It's kind of it's fun. And that really the casino I think for me is more or less. Like, if I'm in a full blackout. And someone's like, let's go to casino then it like is justifiable for me. And it's like we're doing rock and we're making and we can't wait

Jim: 11:45

till like 1030 to go. Yeah, like and you were playing craps on a screen, which was fun. And it was still cool. I was like,

Bobby: 11:51

Yeah, like, it's like you have this. Yeah, it was fun. So the casino baby high rollers, high rollers

Jim: 11:57

wasting money.

Bobby: 11:58

Yeah, it's a like a lot of low rollers. And there may be like one high roller, and they have a high roller room. And I'm like, these are just gonna be fake as much as they're like $5

Jim: 12:06

poke or $5 poker high roller.

Bobby: 12:08

I was thinking of a casino thing to say but I can't think of anything like

Jim: 12:12

break the leg. Next up, or I don't know. I

Bobby: 12:15

don't know what they doing it in. Dang makes it smell rain.

Jim: 12:18

Overall, I like like them but like, like, like, like, like, Oh my god, you know? My like Bill Harris fucking okay, because when we got back from the casino, we did watch cooking with Paris or whatever the fuck it's called cooking with fucking Paris. That was I think it's on Netflix. I don't want to be called Nicolas. And Bobby has a theory that she has like a fake s and a real voice.

Bobby: 12:41

So the theory is that

Jim: 12:42

they sound the same to me. No, yeah,

Bobby: 12:44

I will find proof. I will find a clip.

Jim: 12:47

I think Paris is always that fake? I'm gonna find a club that

Bobby: 12:51

I'm not actually a fan. No. So she This is what she'll do. So she'll be like, yeah, I didn't really want to get those onions. Now I want to fuck up. It's like, or like, you know, man, that's high. But I don't really want that. But when she's bad, it's literally like she turns it on and off like you. Oh, and now I can only go Oh, I know her to

Unknown: 13:15

me. None. And it's sort of like chopping an onion. And I don't know how that's hot on my eyes. Oh, you come in my eyes.

Jim: 13:25

Can we boil the water already? Yeah, it's always it's great. It's so no, I can't do a Paris cuz I hate her. I hate her. And she plays Yeah. But and yet, and yet. I love her. I

Bobby: 13:38

love her. She's smartest shit. She's the dumbest. smartest girl I know. Because she's plays dumb to make millions of dollars. So she's worth 300 million on her own, not even for her inherent inherent inheritance and heritage. But like my, like had rotten in hair tests. That's a big one.

Jim: 13:59

For syllables. Yeah. Oh,

Bobby: 14:02

do I read it a high school level? Yeah, barely, barely. I'm like at eighth grade or eighth and a half. Honestly, my comprehension is not strong. It's not good. Not good. And I'm not making it any better. Not good. I'm not a fan. I'm actually not.

Jim: 14:17

I'm not actually a fan of reading of reading.

Bobby: 14:20

I'd rather listen. I have books on tape. I listen. I have audio bowl. Body of all. Audible. Audio ball. Amazon,

Jim: 14:37

audible. When something is audible, it can be heard,

Bobby: 14:41

right? I know what audio means? I'm like, I can't speak

Jim: 14:46

for audible is not a word. not God. I'm still second. In fact, he said listen, instead of listen.

Bobby: 14:54

I know I think I just had like oh no, she's Not a fan. I'm freaking out. Did you take like 20 milligrams? No, I only took 10 but I haven't had anything to eat because I'm skinny. Oh my god Really? Sorry. I apologize for my

Jim: 15:18

mini stroke. blunder.

Bobby: 15:20

blender, but yeah parasomnias smart. Was that we were talking about

Jim: 15:25

she is. Wow, you just really stank bad.

Bobby: 15:28

thinking I'm serious. I'm a very professional podcaster now I'm happy 100

Jim: 15:35

Here's to you, Perry. So Connie. Connie. Connie here. Oh, you want this Honey? Honey? Honey, honey.

Bobby: 15:44

So yeah. Yeah. parasara is she's smart. And she's dumb. Like It's Hot.

Jim: 15:52

And then like, Saturday we were planning on because it's your actual birthday. We're like, we're gonna do thing. Yeah, I was like, Yeah, let's go.

Bobby: 15:57

Let's I want to actually wait, whoa.

Jim: 15:59

I think I woke up at 1pm. Right?

Bobby: 16:01

And you're like, hey, and I was like, Hey, I'm in bed testing out my new pillow.

Jim: 16:05

My face in you and you're, like, almost asleep in bed. Yeah, I

Bobby: 16:08

was like, I can't. My birthday was fine. And that's one. That's actually fine.

Jim: 16:12

Going forward. That's going to be all our birthdays. So once you got on a Thursday night, honey, no coming back. you texted me Monday and you were like, I'm still hung over.

Bobby: 16:21

still hung up. I was hung over as of as of two yesterday. I'm sad as of yesterday. Okay, it's real. It's true. I drink this now because I'm finding out over four days.

Jim: 16:35

37 hits different.

Bobby: 16:36

It just hits a little harder. Oh, yeah. pounds. You a little wider. Oh, and I don't care that I'm fat. Sorry.

Jim: 16:45

Where did that come from?

Bobby: 16:47

That's just my new thing. 37 and I'm in heaven.

Jim: 16:50

Oh, girl. You're about to be with that gut.

Bobby: 16:55

I know. I think I'm dying. You may be No I'm not. Maybe. Do you think I am? Okay, thank God.

Jim: 17:03

No, I don't think so. The only healthy you are actually I've never been all your lab work is

Bobby: 17:09

not gonna say it.

Jim: 17:10

I've never had an STD I never like

Bobby: 17:12

been. I don't want to say it. I don't want to say it

Jim: 17:15

been to the house. That's all Yeah, really? Never. You look like someone who lives there. No, never.

Bobby: 17:22

I'm never gonna spend the night there. Nothing. Never the most. I

Jim: 17:26

haven't either. Actually. Mines like well, I had my tongue. No, I

Bobby: 17:28

went home to look at a surgical surgical center.

Jim: 17:32

Okay, but never been like gallbladder palmitoyl. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I know that.

Bobby: 17:36

That was my first surgery ever. That's like the worst things ever happened to me.

Jim: 17:39

That's same and that's normal. I want people to know if you're going to the hospital like something's wrong wrong, right? Like, you need to make sure that you don't want to be in a hospital.

Bobby: 17:47

No, and especially in COVID times. You're not going to get in

Jim: 17:53

Oh girl, you're not gonna get it i and we get in now with those credentials

Bobby: 17:56

with delta and lamblia. As I was called lambda, lambda. R sound is bad.

Jim: 18:03

Girl You don't even know.

Bobby: 18:04

I feel like I just constantly have COVID now so just FYI,

Jim: 18:07

that's true.

Bobby: 18:08

And honestly, the boosters are coming. They need to come quicker. I'm gonna get it as soon as possible. Same.

Jim: 18:13

I mean, five. mmediately. We have them. They're available. That's right. Boost my whole boost our halls. Oh, oh my god. Let's play a game. Okay, ready? Ready for the game? game? You ready to come into mega?

Bobby: 18:39

Don't look at your watch batch. That's a whole relevant that's what that is. Yeah, it's game time. Yay. Would you rather Would you rather look someone else's I crossed or drink your own urine. Drink my own urine. Same.

Jim: 18:58

It's salty, but whatever.

Bobby: 18:59

It's mine. It's not your crusty si.

Jim: 19:02

It's my urine.

Bobby: 19:03

It's my body. My child I have to this is my body. What is that? movie, it was a big hit. It was a hit.

Jim: 19:16

I remember it's lasted 2000 years. It was a big hit.

Bobby: 19:19

It's a really big hit. Okay,

Jim: 19:21

so you're in German, and we're in the pits play, whatever, it's

Bobby: 19:23

fine. It's our own pest too. So it's fine self display. Would you rather wear someone else's poop stained underwear or use someone else's toothbrush? And let's say the person is the same person and it's like somebody who's run. See this isn't showered for 20 days. Oh, see, I need to know is on brush for 20 days and then he brushes his teeth into that one. Or you have to wear his poop. Who I don't know how to do either. Just

Jim: 19:50

Just come to me naked and what's my consequence? Well, that's a good Yeah, consequences you have to get buried alive. Oh, okay. So I should know though. Is the poop is it dry stain or wet stain it needs to be dried if it's dry and crusty will wear that

Bobby: 20:09

oh my god damn really

Jim: 20:10

actually looks like you're a gag yeah

Bobby: 20:11

I almost gag what

Jim: 20:13

I would unreal obviously I was gag done religiously

Bobby: 20:17

gag on religiously I

Jim: 20:19

don't want a toothbrush from someone hasn't brushed your teeth in 30 days and I don't want wet poop it's gonna stick to my body not well not dry if it's dry these would you rather's I might have to like, we might need to. Can we do Would you rather for kids, we

Bobby: 20:35

might need to reassess the game. Yeah, this game is not good. Sorry, everyone.

Jim: 20:40

Oh my god. That's a brutal

Bobby: 20:41

Mustang. Right. Ah, MS is not here today, as you know, okay, we're miserable. Are you miserable about?

Jim: 20:58

I've never I love this for you.

Bobby: 21:01

I don't know if I love it.

Jim: 21:02

I mean, I'm in love with it. Why don't you marry it? So what am i miserable about?

Bobby: 21:08

And you're nothing right now.

Jim: 21:09

I know. I'm really early, which is embarrassing to our listeners. Like I don't normally drink truly okay. Anyways, you want to think about it? Yeah.

Bobby: 21:18

I'm miserable about the the moisture in the air. And the humidity. And I'm tired of it being like 95 and then rain and be 85 but feel hotter than 95. And I'm tired. Damn. Tired of summer. I'm ready for fall. Actually, I

Jim: 21:35

agree. I'm tired of everyday. I'm

Bobby: 21:37

actually a fan.

Jim: 21:38

I'm actually a fan of fall. I'm obsessed with fall. Obsessed. I

Bobby: 21:42

cannot wait.

Jim: 21:43

I can hide all this body under a hoodie and I just I love it. In the end. The catalogs are about to turn to fall. Time to look.

Bobby: 21:51

I don't know what's in this fall.

Jim: 21:53

I don't either. I

Bobby: 21:53

mean, not what I'm wearing champions. RDL

Jim: 21:56

Is it really?

Bobby: 21:57

I think so. And I just bought those slip ons. Why would you buy slip ons from they're not flare ups?

Jim: 22:02

Oh, sorry. Like slides like the slides. You just love your feet now. It's gross. No, I wear socks with slides. I don't I don't want my grandpa.

Bobby: 22:11

Okay anywho anywho What are you miserable about? I

Jim: 22:14

miserable basically the same thing like every time I have a day off and I'm like I'm gonna go the pearl it's raining. Yeah, that's the other thing and I'm like so what is going on with the summer in the rain and it's raining? Do you look like Austin is raining randomly? The only reason I think of that is because I follow you know who?

Bobby: 22:31

Oh yeah, my dad was telling me that it's like been cooling. They haven't been over 100 only twice and usually it's like probably 20 were in Austin Texas.

Jim: 22:39

Really? Really? Meanwhile like the Northwest Meanwhile in Ohio

Bobby: 22:43

or were hotter than Atlanta half the time I'm like

Jim: 22:46

Texas above 100 most days this past week. People

Bobby: 22:48

don't understand how hot Ohio is so hot so hot as parallel.

Jim: 22:52

So you know what? Have the census data high beat out a lot of cities where the 14th most populous. Honey, this city is real.

Bobby: 23:01

I mean, it's the city is the Eilis of real

Jim: 23:03

people don't understand no and I'll brag about our size all the time.

Bobby: 23:07

Honestly, it's a locale but it's really thick. Exactly. Thank you. Ma'am. It

Jim: 23:13

does look small but it's thick and

Bobby: 23:14

it's basically like like New York City is just like a big bulge of balls and deck like it's just yeah,

Jim: 23:18

Manhattan's the deck right

Bobby: 23:20

in Columbus like the balls are just a normal size. That's the downtown Yeah, then you have a long shaft all the way up to campus. You can even wrap it around right High Street all the way up. Know what I love the City High Street. So yeah,

Jim: 23:37

so yeah, like I'm just over here wrapping this city honey wrap baby. Do you know what we did last night we rode scooters. From Grandview I'm scared of scooters. I know but this was a link and you can be supported on a link Okay, they're sturdy as fuck. Oh, that's

Bobby: 23:51

the kind of thing No, yeah, they're

Jim: 23:53

actually I think I have like this. You can put two feet side by side. Are you hi?

Bobby: 23:57

No, I'm about to call your bed shots out with our harnesses.

Jim: 24:01

Oh, are you about to go into my segment? Thanks, mez. Miserable with

Bobby: 24:13

we have to have the Word of the Week for this phrase, and he might get an appropriate word.

Jim: 24:25

Okay, Word of the Week is gay. bathhouse. So, you know, bath houses go back a long time like the Romans used to have bath houses where all the men would gather women could Greeks do what you do whatever you want. You just walk around.

Bobby: 24:43

Yeah, you could do just like a big really

Jim: 24:45

big really focus on your whole and solves the whole. To this day. We have bathhouses and gay bath houses have been a big thing in some of the major cities.

Bobby: 24:56

So describe to a straight person what happens in a bath?

Jim: 24:58

Yeah, it's like a bath house. You Walk in, and you have to give usually like your ID, or the front desk key, you have to get blad

Bobby: 25:08

Rose first you get prepped, I should get by.

Jim: 25:12

Now you give your ID the key, so they have it so you can just like do anything terrible or run away, right? And then they know who you are. And then you get a locker or a room. You can rent a room or a locker rooms in the middle, and then you go in and you just like Take off your clothes and put a towel on the give you a towel and do your thing. You can go to the lecture. But the sauna there's a gym,

Bobby: 25:35

you can go to the rooms there's usually like a fuck wall.

Jim: 25:37

You can get fucked randomly. You can find someone to fuck you can bring someone there glory holes. Yeah, it's later. More you know with Jeff. Ah, oh, farm. Oh, make me gone. What? Okay, so this is just going right off the bat house is the reason that's the word of the week. I went to my first bath.

Bobby: 26:10

Oh, I know. You little Actually, I've been before you. Out of this one in Columbus. No, fuck no, I'm not the one where everyone is. I can't go there and go to Union and get a drink.

Jim: 26:24

No, no, you can you can probably get a better drink, probably. So this place is called club Columbus. And I'm like, Hi. I wonder what it's like my friend was like, oh, let's go to the pool. I mean, at the pool. I'm like, saying like a lot. It is really they've said like 15 times

Bobby: 26:43

it's because you're channeling Paris Hilton. Oh, yeah. Like we started doing it. And like now like, I can't Are you like can't stop.

Jim: 26:50

So I'm looking at that. I said, Where is the pool and I get the address and the pool is at the bath house. So I said, okay, but are we going to the bath house? And my friend goes Yeah, we are. I'm a member. Oh, shocker. Okay. Oh, you little bit.

Bobby: 27:09

Well, realtors have to get their business wherever.

Jim: 27:15

not actually a fan. Yay. Okay, so Hi, gay. I go there. And I get there first, of course, because your prompt cuz I know. I'm prompt him. Oh, you're nervous. And I'm nervous. I'm like, I gotta get there. I have no idea what I'm doing. I walk in. They're like, Do you need a locker room? I was like, What? No, I'm just here to swim. Yeah, I was like, I'm meeting a friend. They go. There's no one waiting for you. died. I looked at him. I was like, No, no, no. He's like, on his way. And he's like, okay, there's

Bobby: 27:48

no one here for you. Yeah, there's

Jim: 27:50

no one here. I'll just pack it up honey. And I was like, No, I mean, he's on his way. And he looked around. He said, Yeah, no, there's nobody here though. I know. I know, sir. I've got it. And I don't I don't want to assume your pronouns. But I'm sorry, sir. I'm just waiting for a friend then. The cell it's $10 to get in. And I think it was only $10 to get a locker. And so when I say get a locker, there's these lockers that are like high school. automatically lock, you get a key that you keep on your wrist. So you have your key with you all the time. So I go in. I had my bathing suit. I had sunscreen. I had all this chicks. I thought I was going to a pool. Right and then I walk in it's like a dark room. There's a TV on and there's a bunch of chairs. There's like some guy playing there was some porn playing on one TV. There's just a guy sitting there naked. It's usually like jerking off like misty in there to like almost

Bobby: 28:40

do a fog machine. House or what?

Jim: 28:44

I go to my locker, I get my bathing suit on so I'm like, naked putting my suit on. And there's like, two guys in there watching. Going. Yeah. I'm like, Guys, cuz it's like 4pm it's not it's not really a prime situation. Right? There are people working out strangely, like, people actually just work well. And I think that

Bobby: 29:03

some gays are really comfortable with the idea of it. So they're like, Oh, this is my gym. This is where I relax and the

Jim: 29:08

gym was empty so I could see why you don't see okay, so I get my bathing suit on I'm trying to find the pool. I can't find how to get there. I'm walking down a hallway. There's all these doors on the hallway like rooms like Oh, these are the rooms that you can rent by. I looked to my left one of the doors is just wide open. There's like a 500 pound man on his back with something covering his crotch. I

Bobby: 29:29

guess I'm busted head.

Jim: 29:30

Yeah, but his mouth was open. His head was over the side of the bed. His mouth is open. So I looked down and he like waved me in. And I'm thinking do I

Bobby: 29:41

do I just do I go stick my cock in that fat boys

Jim: 29:44

like, Am I allowed to start soft? Are

Bobby: 29:46

you gonna like work me up? That's hot starting soft, just FYI. But he

Jim: 29:49

was also not attractive to me. Right. So

Bobby: 29:51

it's like a whole

Jim: 29:53

No, and not like talk but some

Bobby: 29:55

people do.

Jim: 29:57

Well, yeah, that's because he looks like he had had a couple loads on his Just how I feel

Bobby: 30:00

I got a cold telling him.

Jim: 30:02

You were, oh, that's a funny timing for the 500 Batman with his head over the edge of the

Bobby: 30:07

I pulled my Nan's happened to my neck. Was that me?

Jim: 30:10

It made me Oh my god, what if it was me? I would have walked in and just started gagging. Oh, Bob's Bob's on Bob's. Okay, so I walked down the hall further down. There's another like 400 pound man in a room. And he's just jerking off. You're really painting a great picture. I don't know, but that's exactly what happened. So I looked in that room and I'm going Oh, hi. I said hi. Oh, that's so bad. I go, hi. And he just like, looked away. For me. That's not part of my fantasy. But his hand was like in his crotch. You couldn't see any penis because it was just belly and then legs. So he was maybe touching something but he was that bit. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So I didn't go in that room. I kept going. I saw a hot tub in the distance like, Okay, I'm going I found a pool. I go outside. There's actually fun normal people.

Bobby: 31:08

Right? But the pool is probably where there's like, it's like camp

Jim: 31:12

is hot. 29 year old completely new with tattoos. blond hair, like he could get it. And he just had his dick out. He didn't give a fuck. That's how camping is. Yeah, I got it.

Bobby: 31:22

We got to fucking go. Cuz it's like you don't have to get naked but you feel more. You can write if you want to you can and it just

Jim: 31:29

I slide my suit on cuz I was nervous. I left it on. I got in the water. I got out of the water. Everyone's staring at me. Right. And I'm not even hot. But like because of the clientele people were staring at me and 29 year old or 20 year old. Okay. an hour and a half later, my friend shows up who invited me here. He rented a room because he knows what he's doing. You always spread eagle in a room ready to go rip roaring, okay, but I'm delayed. I'm not aware of this because I didn't have my phone. I wasn't looking at it out by the pool talking to the 29 year old blah, blah, blah. And then I asked 29 year old if you want to go to the hot tub. And he did. So he gets up. We go to the hot tub Do you wanna? And I realized like, Tom, okay, I was like, Do you care if I take my suit off? And he's like, No, not at all. So I got naked. I get in the hot tub with him.

Bobby: 32:17

So asked if you took off your suit.

Jim: 32:20

I didn't want him to think because I had it on up to that point. I didn't want to think like I'm taking it off expecting so

Bobby: 32:24

maybe I don't want to have an out. No. Well,

Jim: 32:26

I didn't want them to think I was like trying to come onto them even though I was right. Like, and I was definitely like half chub. Please feel over here. Yeah. Well, I mean, I told him I was like, you're very hot. And he was like, thanks. And then we just kept talking. No, he he was we were

Bobby: 32:42

I gave you the look, he at

Jim: 32:43

mine invited me to the sauna. So

Bobby: 32:46

that's where the things get kicking off.

Jim: 32:48

Yeah, well, they were going to we get into sauna and there's a used condom on the floor. And it was too hot. Yeah. So I was like, Can we go to cooking? We didn't do anything. We sat right next to each other and we're kind of like, touching thighs and all that. But like

Bobby: 33:03

it's so bro. It's so hot. Yeah, like

Jim: 33:06

shorts. Like it's just fun to sit naked with someone.

Bobby: 33:09

Do you think that's because we were lacking male bonding growing

Jim: 33:11

where we lacked male bonding. You know, male friends, right? We were never naked around other men. I feel like that's why I wasn't ever naked around other men.

Bobby: 33:17

I think that's why I like campus because like, I was like,

Jim: 33:20

if we had done sports and stuff and been like, no big deal nude in the shower. Fine. Like, oh, you're naked around another guy. Whatever. Yeah, but this is like, and we're supposed to we're supposed to do that.

Bobby: 33:30

We're supposed to like, as a gay you feel like oh my God, if I ever took a shower, I'm gonna get interrupted again. And I'm gonna get busted and I know I'm gay. And then did it.

Jim: 33:37

So you're worried about it? so well. We went to the showers after the sauna. Oh, how so fucking sad. And so I got worried like, Oh, no, I'm gonna get hard. And he's not going to be

Bobby: 33:48

a good use of that anymore. monotone and oh, no, I'm gonna get hard.

Jim: 33:52

Oh, no, I'm gonna get hard. I didn't, but I definitely was still a little bit.

Bobby: 33:57

I mean, a little chubby a little

Jim: 33:59

chopped. For me. A little chub looks normal deck.

Bobby: 34:02

See I feel the same way like I need that I

Jim: 34:04

get a little chopped. It's kind of like ha I'm like, oh my Dixon normal size. Why can't it just be normal? And when I say normal I mean average sorry to everyone out there not insulting small dicks, but like no actually love all decks. You know what's really weird? Like truly.

Bobby: 34:18

Right. And the thing is, is I think there are like you would think, but you were born that way. Yeah, that the point. But you also you're born the way you are like, he's like you. Like, it's like sexuality. Like you don't choose like, I want my dick to be you know,

Jim: 34:33

I'm trying to tell guys that. It's very interesting. I was with a guy recently who said like, Oh, you know, it's not it's not very impressive. Not not much there. And I'm like, I said, there's plenty there. Right? And I loved it. And I sucked it. full mouth for everything. Right? And that's the thing. It's even, like, this is kind of fun. Right? So anyways, I'm in the shower with this hot 29 year old tattoo tatted up and we didn't We just chatted the whole shower. It was like so fun it's awesome after that I'm like I love bath houses I want to go back right that's it I didn't even do anything bad right this I didn't even have sex there. I just thought it was like fun to hang out with other guys in an air in a in a open low open forum stress nude and and when I was walking back to the showers the other shower to my locker shower to go shower again Don't ask me why she already felt dirty. I felt dirty. Because it's just a little sticky. A little sticky. You Laurel, I was like I'm gonna take a second shower and like really raised a lot of stuff this time.

Bobby: 35:43

The other ones about while the pump?

Jim: 35:44

Yeah, yeah. And I got soaked up. I was loose soap that whole but then people just started watching me shower. So I was done quick. Anyways, I go back close on a leave. I realized I want to live in a bathhouse.

Bobby: 35:55

And I want to live in a campground.

Jim: 35:57

Well, I want to go to a campground for my day.

Bobby: 36:01

I mean, did you have a fucking goddamn fare? Yeah. I didn't plan it.

Jim: 36:07

I don't know how many bed bunks to get.

Bobby: 36:09

I don't either. But you

Jim: 36:10

know, at least three.

Bobby: 36:13

My friend Matt who met us at Union he works at torso and short north. Hello, Matt. Hi, Matt. We went he was at torsa we walked in and he's like, Oh, I get off in like 30 minutes sounds like come over and have a drink. So he told us about sorry. He told us about roselyn and how he just went for Christmas in July, which was like a huge event. And they camp and they use tents but like it was you have a plugs like air conditioner. Oh, okay. That's fine. So it's like in October it might actually be like kind of fun to be like underneath October sky. Yeah. Anyway, that's why I thought of that. I think that we could go get gear and like have a tent and backpack You look so like have your beard right now. Like it's kind of hot. You're like camping gear and go get gear. We could go get gear.

Jim: 37:00

I think maybe that would be fun. If they don't if they don't have we have to I still

Bobby: 37:04

would like a bed. They have to even like rent it early, though. I think for so far. No, we're not because I don't know.

Jim: 37:14

It's Halloween, like, I

Bobby: 37:15

don't know, yadda yadda we got to dress up as like flight attendants or something. Yes. And I'm the fat one that's getting fired.

Jim: 37:21

Well, I'm sorry that I've just bragged about our city. And now we have to be real with you that we have one area that will short northeast area

Bobby: 37:28

is the best area and yeah, and there's a lot of crime happening right now. And if I catch any motherfuckers stealing from any of my friends, I find you you're done. But also I want to like go over a little some rules real quick, just real quick. Okay, if you see somebody breaking a window in a car, start

Jim: 37:44

taking pictures or video immediately

Bobby: 37:46

be safe about it. If you're in a big group, I'd say you whole group walks up Yeah. What are you gonna kill all of them or call 911 and say there's somebody out here knocking out windows seen?

Jim: 37:57

So I think that they're there with Jim This was

Bobby: 38:02

right. You're being fucking crazy.

Jim: 38:05

Because it's 30 I'm calling you from innovation and Nick.

Bobby: 38:12

So are you. You're calling me From where? From animation infinix Okay, I'm sorry. I'm not available right now. Oh my god. I just hung up. It was like, art fanatics, something. I'm like, Oh, sorry. I don't know what I'm doing. I thought it was Miss calling us from a secret number. I'm like, Is he in the hospital? Fine. Oh, it's the final, final thought.

Jim: 38:39

My final thought is that I think gay men have missed out on a lot of things in life, in their personal growth, about how to have relationships with other men because we a lot of times spurn our fathers or they spurn us we don't have male friends growing up. Well, most of the time, we don't have male friends growing up.

Bobby: 38:58

Did you guys make a comment about Yeah, you have male friends, but you don't fully open up to them because

Jim: 39:02

you're scared. You're afraid of being accused of being of sexual so like

Bobby: 39:06

other straight guys, like grab each other's dicks like I would never do that kind of sucks. I was scared baby like you're a faggot.

Jim: 39:12

You don't want to joke around anything with the body? Correct. And so I think because we miss out on that we've missed out on a lot of life. And as you get older and more comfortable being gay, it's time to re explore that so don't be afraid of re exploring being around men and just chilling out and relaxing and not being sexual necessarily also been okay if you want to be sexual, right? It's just there's a vibe like just figure that vibe out you and figure it out. But

Bobby: 39:38

also don't just shut your Shut your mouth on the gay community. I was gonna say

Jim: 39:43

why don't we go to your final five my final thought

Bobby: 39:45

is that through thick and thin. Mostly bad. Oh my god. Mostly thick and hardly thin. Then ankles. Yeah, Heather McMahon. That was a steal. I'm really happy. Were the shows at our 100th Episode 100th episode like that's crazy. And you know what? What? I don't know if this is gonna be the only show this week. Oh wait, hi gay. We'll see.

Unknown: 40:10

We'll see.

Jim: 40:11

I don't know about this.

Bobby: 40:12

It's a secret girl secrets are up Baker it's around is your final thoughts? Ms. You know, I just love us. Obsessed. I'm obsessed. I

Jim: 40:24

want to go on a tour of Europe together well yeah, like something crazy like a crazy trip. Like Bora Bora.

Bobby: 40:31

That's not your that's just as on a beach. Yeah, like we're going to Bora Bora. Bitch. You are weezy

Jim: 40:40

I'm in Mykonos. Almost like you fell out locked out of bed.

Bobby: 40:52

Like a cow in heat. Cow. And

Jim: 40:57

that actually does describe you. I'm not actually a fan. I am. Thank you. Thank you.

Bobby: 41:04

Thank you guys for showing up and showing out. Make sure you follow us on Instagram. And Spotify stars.

Jim: 41:13

Five stars give us a five star review. Thank you. Okay. Ah,

Bobby: 41:18

if you've listened this long. See you tomorrow. Why?

Jim: 41:23

I'm freaking out.

Unknown: 41:24

Thank you for listening to another episode of She's Not Doing So Well. Leave a message with questions or comments at 669-207-4643 Don't forget to subscribe and check out our links in the podcast description of this episode. These information will be expressed official policy or position of being a Regency this has been a house of great production