There Better Be An Open Bar At My Wake

First I draw the line what's wrong? What's right? Drunkenness is responsible for much. You see, Ralph was a homosexual person who demands an intimate relationship with members of their own sex. Pardon me says one never knows when the homosexual is about Hi, I'm Bobby from not well and make sure you subscribe below. Share it with your friends here, here here. Thank you for following us and tuning in and this is gonna be a viewer discretion is advised kind of situation because we get a little rowdy.

That's upside down. pilonidal upside down. It's pilonidal Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of not Well, I'm Bobby. I'm Jim. Are you cold? Sweetie? I'm a little sweetie. Please tell you something. Yes. When I do that are transcriptions of the episodes. One of the top keywords is honey, is it every week? I'm like, It's okay. And honey. Okay, so now now I think it is now also say now now, um, we do it as like a joke but then sometimes I'm like, Oh no, we say um, and Matt do so it's like when it's worth making fun of stuff now. I'm Oh, honey, I didn't even think of that. Like you'll say funny stuff. Like you'll go like and then I went down the slide whatever. Why was I saying?

Oh, we're in at that point. It's a very gonna show I'm feeling it. I'm feeling it. You're puffing fat clouds I'm puffing some fat fucking clouds as the kids would say the jewel which is now extinct maybe I'm not sure if they pan it or jewel is gone they banned them who needed a jewel anyways just smoke a cigarette in your lungs just do it the old fashioned way like the FDA is like we're not going to cancel cigarettes but Julie's terrible for you. What Wait So Philip Morris still has your fucking Dex Got it. Got it. Got it. Go smoker Marlboro reds honey. Now what were you Parliament lights Parliament P Fox but I also my main was Marlin Marlboro menthol ultra light one hundreds.

Fucking like you imagine with this long I'll take my ultralight 100 is please because I needed to be able to smoke for 45 minutes on the phone. I'll take a pack of those. That's why I can't talk on the phone. Take a dick in that bathroom just wanted me with like a nightmare like hookups I'd have to scrub my finger I would screw up my fingers right here because people could know you're a smoker and I would always be like a nonsmoker when you're wrapping your fingers around some married man stick like he didn't notice this now. He didn't care. Yeah, smoke cigarettes on the way over. He's thinking about his wife like, or is he? I think in that moment, he's not thinking about me. He's thinking about you looking like his wife. He's like, look at that man proceeds do they stare at that? I don't know. I don't know what they stare. I think they're gross. Did they like lay on the bed and just close their eyes as you're like jerking them off? Or what would you do? I actually kind of hate eye contact. I'm not gonna lie. Is that weird? No, like when I'm getting. I'll do like a little look back like, but like, I'm not gonna stare at them.

Ya know? Like, don't look at me, okay, like, okay, that's kind of true. Think of other things like what I'm about to tell them. I'm not really looking to like, concentrate. It's the Prozac for me. Like, I'm gonna, please don't go away. Don't go away. Don't go away. Because like, that's literally that's true. So it's like, once I get to that point, I'm like, I can't I gotta go. Nothing can change because a lot of times we'll wait and then it's like, oh, my can't wait. No. Yeah, I'm a non non waiter, but I am a cock ring. Where now? Oh, wow. Yeah, it keeps the deck hard. Oh, it's nice. Well, you can just get Cialis. It's cheap. It's generic. It's more pills. I'm on a lot of pills. Well, you just take it as needed. And then you know, for sure. As long as the Cochrane works actually, you're right less medicine the better now like now is it a full Cochrane there's there's there's there's an FDA approved one that looks like a little horseshoe it's seated on Instagram. It's like it goes under my balls and above my over my dick and under my ball. So it's like an Israeli surgery at all. I know. I've seen that one. I know you're talking about though. Yeah. Taiwan. I want to do the tie was wow, it compresses the whole the whole area is compressed. I should try this. Yeah, so Wow. Yeah. So babe, working on that at least you don't worry about that. Yeah. If you lose your erection, right. It stays hard and it fluffs you up honey. We're really at that age. I mean, can't stay hard. We can't come. So that's hot. Welcome to the millennials are starting to welcome to the 30s Millennials are falling apart. It's time like we're here. It's time for the Boomers to fall off it move over boomers because we're the new like, literally, you know, everybody forgets about Gen X. Yeah, we write about Genet are so boring. You grew up in the 80s Gray. You're a waste of time, literally like we're like thanks for the Berlin Wall coming down. I mean, what even happened then? Sally Fields or AIDS aids, maybe that's why that's like, fucking but it was, but it was also not their fault. So I don't know. Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan didn't have a lot of good things in the 80s. What was the ones before the boomers you know floorboard, two people. I don't know if they had a tie downs right. Oh, someone's pissed ahead of up ahead. The World War tours I don't know it might have been something else. Well actually, you know, we've got a little glow but I've got some news to share. No I got Iran weightwatchers Okay, are we back off of it because I am I did it for I did it for a week and then I and then last night I made pasta with meat sauce, vegetarian meat sauce, and then I went I prefer that pizza exactly is vegetarian meat sauce. It's impossible sausage and it's incredible. Yeah. And Matt loves it. Like Matt, shout out to Matt for loving his beef Moroni and cheese. Let's put it this way. He does the dishes when I make it that night. Sounds a major hole. And he also does my laundry. Oh, he does all the cleaning now. By the way. Oh my God, I need to you need an assistant. You need a housewife. As my mother said, say I need an assistant. I'm like for what? Now? I know because I don't want to do any of it. And Matt does it all. God bless getting older sucks. And one of the things I need to talk about today is a little bit somber. But I want to make it funny if that makes sense. Oh, no. Oh, I think I know what you're gonna say you do? Well, I don't really because like all of a sudden, I had a death in the family. My cousin my friend out Monday that my cousin died overnight. I'm trying out Listen, I don't do very well as we know. So I really wanted he died overnight. And so in honor of him honestly, because he was in New York. He like went to New York City do Broadway he did off Broadway. He was in Seussical. All about Dr. Seuss. Yeah, he was very he was working on a radio station in Cleveland when he passed 7095 Who did the weather? Oh, I found out that like a young person. He was younger than me just recently passed away. There was no reason or rhyme or reason. I'm sure there is a reason I

discovered but for 35 year old just to die. So anyway, I'm dealing with death right now. Just doing we stopped because I need him and honor him though. I might. How did you know him? Well, he was my cousin. And I mean, close. How do you have a lot? How did you know him? But did you really know him? Besides that if they died? I would be like, well, that's I have a really big history with him as kids. Okay. As adults we I mean he lives in New York City. He never came home for like Thanksgiving and shit. So like I think he met Michael maybe once earlier you said LA and then he went to LA Oh, so he did New York City for like 12 years training on Broadway and then went to LA to try to act and then that ended pretty quickly. Then he came back to Cleveland went to media school we actually he asked me about the podcast at one point a year ago I think should have had him on too late now. I think in honor of him and his entertainment and his spirit we should have I'm just gonna have fun with this and I want to talk about death in a awkward way because when our grandmother died, he was a mess at the funeral home so I think it's very interesting that now I'm gonna go look at him. And I kissed my mother goodbye that road tunnel and now that's the rotunda he's so I'm having a lot Okay, so what I wanted I kind of wanted to talk about just like the whole process of death. Oh, I thought we were gonna do a Broadway song for in honor of him. I think you were like, do you want to do a song? Okay, let's do a song let's do a song for him. Ah yeah.

In honor of my cousin Hey Bobby's think about him all Damn, we were gonna go to the funeral and praise Him. Praise God. Praise God. Pray

it's not to make light of it. But he was an actor. And for me I like here's what I'm getting as an actor and I'm in the media industry, but I wanted to like how I just like an honor of him like I'm gonna keep going and try to pursue the dream for both of us. You're gonna go to No, but we had the same dream of entertainment. Okay, okay, sort of so like he had a he had more balls than me. I don't know if they're bigger. You have two bigger balls because he like would get in front of people and talk and I'm like yeah, he was on stage or like literally or an understudy at least he was on stage he was the lead in physical that's pretty cool. Like he actually like it really did big things. I mean, you can't live there for 12 years. Yeah, so it was a very it's been a very awkward week but I did want to discuss a little bit in I don't think we ever had talked about the actual like the death the death process and processing death and then the funeral so there's a few things I've been thinking my main thing this week so far telling all my cousins and family members is everyone grieves differently that's my favorite line. Wow. Because it's true as an adult I'm realizing that you everybody's different some people freak the fuck out and start crying some people like me I go into a total like blackout like I'm fully blacked. Well. That's the weed. Well, that's before the weed then I go early on. Then I'm like, what's happening? I did tell my mom I might take an attaboy at the funeral but anyway we'll get back to that part. But yeah, so I think it's just really awkward. Like everybody has to deal with this at some point everyone grieves differently. Oh, yeah, you're unless you don't know anyone. Right, which that's pretty rare. But I guess for those lonely people out there that don't know anyone. I'll be your friend. We are your friends. Isn't that crazy? Isn't that crazy? I forgot what you said. I was thinking, I was thinking about it. So the first thing that's really awkward is you get a phone call, okay? And depending on who's delivering the news will depend on how you react sometimes. Okay, so when somebody calls you like huffing and puffing and crying, I'm like, Who's that? Who's that? Yeah, just say it. I'll speak my truth. I found out about this while I was at the weed store. I was actually shocking. Now, Steven loves marijuana, I think so anyway, so I'm at the fucking ATM having to do a second round of ATM because they only do 300 At a time at this ATM and I needed 400. But a lot of we bought a lot of weed. Okay, about a lot. I think I filled 16 of the 45 days or something like that. Like, I mean, I can't like I don't know how people must be taking every hours. I know. I'm like, and it's so dumb. Some guy walked in with a fucking weed hat on anyway. So there I am looking around and I'm like getting my way to my cousin's calling. I'm like, I'll get in a second another call another call another call. And I was like, okay, like, obviously, something's not right. So I'm like, hello. Hey, can you talk? And I'm like, Yeah, I'm sitting there waiting for my name to be called, like, I'm at a doctor's office. And then I get the news, then I'm like, what? And I'm like, whoo, ha, yeah, I actually had to have like, who? Like, who's that? And I'm like, Oh, they just call my name. I gotta call you back. So I had to go pick up my situation, my sales transaction, which I mean, I did a deal. I didn't know this was happening. So I was like, Hey, I talked her for a little bit. And I was like, Hey, let me just call you right back. Yeah, don't worry. I had to call her back and ask her to repeat it because I forgot who she said actually. So that's why I'm very like I blackout when you tell me so I read so I can react to am in it. I think because of my childhood trauma that I automatically go into protection mode instead of like mourning for myself. Well remember how we are good with handling crises and emergencies. So we're gonna plan we also gonna do this. Like, when's the funeral? She's like, Ah, he just was found out. I'm like, we'll figure it out. We got to get this going. You know what I mean? Yeah, exactly. That's my status. So I think it's just very awkward. That's awkward. What were you thinking? Were you even sad then? Or were you No, and I actually don't I get sad in weird ways. This is where the whole everybody grieves differently. And that's like, my theme of the week because for me, I shut it down. I bury it, but I also am like, like, right now. I feel like I can throw up at any moment like my voice a little bit shaky constantly because I'm just like, like, you could throw up at any moment. Oh, god. No. Get the bucket with plants. Like you just pull that bucket up here real quick, just to show the folks like you must make sure nothing falls out. This is the fucking bucket he was gonna get me I have plants growing out of a fake plants. Anyway, that's from when he threw up some seeds and they grew. That's exactly right. So you came home and then you were like continued to blackout or you had to talk. My part that I don't want to do is you

Is this Steven? I know it's him. Maybe it is Stephen. Are the lights if you're here that one definitely got lighter. Look at it. Do you see it getting lighter? Stephen Stephen glass the light now Are you watching me naked and the sharks I was wondering about oh relatives like is my grandma. We're gonna copper in jacking off on the couch like is that she's a she does like how she's like he is so full of energy. And he's so full. You need to let that go. We've got to stop him from eating anymore. She's only gonna be fat, but well, they all do. They're like, Oh, you're skinny. You're too skinny. You're hungry. I'm like, No, I'm not finished your food ice cream. Third plate and you're there like finish your food. You're like I'm on my third plate. Yeah, like there's so little bit more cleaning up. I'm like, oh my god years old. Like anyways, okay, like we're just a little trash bucket. Or they call a slot bucket slot, a slot machine, if you will, a slot machine. I'm a slot machine. We are now we

have a slot machine now just call me. I went to two breakfast places today. As you saw Jeff is just very confused about did you have to talk to all the families I dread that like I don't want to talk to every I don't want to call my mom and then call my sister and then call my other brother in the middle. I actually broke the news to my sister. But I'm no broke news before. I've never broke news. And I think what I learned on the breaking of the news is you have to just say it. Because a lot of time around the bow. I did one second. I was like no, fuck it. I'm just saying it. I said I have some bad news. Yeah. Are you sitting and I was like, nevermind, I'm just gonna say like, I just need to say it. And so then she bursts out and crying right away, which is that's what I'm saying. So every grieves. Not to be right. No, like, I just don't. I'm like very like, No, you're kidding. Oh, like Holy fuck. And then I go into like a full black. Yeah, so anyway, so that this whole process then now I'm spurred on this whole thing. I think I might be in a midlife crisis or spawning into what I've been thinking all the past few days. Obviously. It always brings up moments for yourself. You're sad about the person dying, but it also generally ultimately goes back to you because you are

because you're dying to that's your ego. Right? So then you realize that could be me. Now is this process of thought differently? Because two years ago, you didn't even want to talk about it at all. And now. I wonder if the wheat has helped you think about it more. Maybe I think I'm trying to do shrooms. I still want to go death. Yeah, I want to Yeah, you need ego death? I do. Because once you lose your ego, you see that life is just beautiful and you don't have to worry about well, okay, and this also Okay, I'm gonna I know there's a lot I'm saying like the fucking telescope that saw the universe, we ain't shit. Okay? Mo we ain't shit we ain't shit. So like, why am I so concerned about like, you know what I'm saying? You're like, that's the that's the like, maybe it's the combo of my cousin's death and the space where you're like, Oh, she's like, Wait, so literally zoom out that keeps zooming out and out now. That's weird. Who bleh This is B? Is that not freak? you the fuck out? No, I think it's awesome. It's so cool. Just makes me realize that like, we are, like, so years, billions of years. That's what's even your like to live from billions of years. And that's billions of years ago, right? And here I am, like, again. So it just brings it in perspective, where why do I give a fuck about anything or anybody excited as far as like, what they care about, like what I say? Or do or how I react or how I'm my authentic self. I'm going to react differently than anybody else. And I should be able to do that without fear of judgment. And that's why I think you need ego death. I need to go deaf. And I think I'm getting close, like naturally ego to your mind. I think I am like, I'm kind of done with I don't care. Like I don't care. I just put up a YouTube video with my tits. So that's pretty shirtless. That's good. I don't care. I kind of liked that. I know. It was cute. It was fine. It was fun. It was free. And it was here we are. So that part of the death thing. I go start going into whatever but now I'm dreading the midlife. No, I'm going back to death. This is the part that I really want to talk about because I think it's so fucked up. And we're and this can be a little bit humorous. Okay. It's called the wake. Yeah, or calling hours or the viewing there's always the viewing it's like I don't want to view anything I don't want to view this tradition has got to die. And I think I that's our next campaign is no more viewings because I think it's the weirdest I don't know how anybody can get closer to what is a viewing? I usually go to Catholic type situations. I don't know if it's anything different or not. I don't think there's some differences I think awake is when it's like overnight maybe and you like have the body in your house and you guard the body or watch the body overnight before the funeral but I think a viewing is just you go to the funeral home and view the body and do not so horrified. I just was Oh yeah, they used to like you keep the body in the house I believe well, I remember my grandmother's I didn't see any in the Irish do it like an Irish. Wait, isn't that what an Irish wake is? We need to learn this. Like there's chair setup. Yeah. And you're like sit there and look at the answer. Like why am I sitting here casually having conversation drinking like the coffee from the cheapass machine in the lobby being like, says that. He looks great. They just sit there. They don't look great. They don't look great. You always just talk and you're like, What are you doing? What have you been up to? It's like we aren't talking. I haven't like that's my summary. Right now is I hate that my uncle's my aunts my grandpa is like I've been to so that's I've been a viewings, too. I got drunk at the last viewing, like really a little too drunk. My mom was mad. Let's put it that. Well. She wasn't mad. She was just all aggrieved different had enough. Oh, that's when you hear it or not enough. But you've had a lot of white claws. And I was like, no. Are we going to a Mexican restaurant after this? You're like, I'm hungry bitch get this body down. I kept asking. I was like, of course you were humble. Because it's like you have to wait for the priests to do the rosary prayer. And then the other prayer like the father the prayer and it's like we're gonna hear a eulogy tomorrow. Why are we doing all this talking now? It's really bizarre. Like the whole thing is bizarre to me. I don't like it. I think it needs to no pun intended. Die. Yeah, viewings are just humans are horrible. I think they're horrible. It's nice to get the family together. But you're going to be at the funeral and then after the funeral, you have a party. So it's like, Why do you have a party before? And it's not even actually like, you know, what's weird about funerals? is I actually like the before partying more than the after, because you usually get fucking hammered. Like you're tired at the end of a funeral. Like it's it's emotionally draining. So to me the after party is not really what I'm looking for. I look forward to after the way but sometimes there's good food. Yeah, but I can't eat after a funeral. It makes me I feel sad. Oh, really? Oh, you're ready to hit the buffet right after I'm starving. I'm like, is there a pasta salad here? It's always pasta salad. I don't know why. It's always like it's cold cuts and some sandwiches and it's like, trays of meat you're like and then rolls on the side that to me. I'm like, why not to make my own sandwich, right? I don't want to make what is that about always that we've got to change? It's always like church food. Like the church caters it and you're like, Oh, thanks for these rotten Chipotle but we have to have this but now I'm eating Sunkist bread. Yes. Exactly. Like it's like it is always that little packet man. And for some reason love the man is more though I always I squirt to Pam I'm too when I was when I hated management now. Well, that's why we're like how we are because now I'm obsessed with mayonnaise. I would I put on egg sandwich I put on everything Honey, I'll suck it dry. Suck that man. i You did get me into Duke. So I would like a shout out for that. Oh, so you're shouting me out? Yes. You're welcome. Duke's mayonnaise if you haven't heard of it, public sub if you're in the south. And that's the Hot Tip of the Day. Public sub is with the name of the public subs No. Public sub sandwich. Oh, did they make it with Duke? Well, I guess I kind of combined two things at once and I confused you. So that means the audience is probably confused. Was that correct? You're like Dukes and public subs in the south public subsidized Publix the grocery store. Yeah, they are actually real. So our public is getting a sub your sub use their Manet's, but then grab your dukes while you're there, too. That's what I was trying to say. His head meats and cheese. Fuck. Boards head board my fucking head. Oh fucking Shiggy so I'm my main I'm just gonna like so yeah, see my true truth about it a little bit. I'm really scared to see a young person. Yikes. Like, I've never seen a young body. You know what? I don't know if I have because you see the old bodies you're like, Yeah, they look like shit. Because they're like, they're also like, they were dying anyway, you know that hard and put away? Okay, like you're like, yeah, the shot. When Granny's 87 It's gonna. You can't make her look like her. You might better I read that you can put cotton balls in the cheeks to puff them out. And you can kind of sew things up a little inside. That's why I can oh my god, I will probably look okay. I think so he donated organs. Thank the Lord. I just thought I'd bring that up a little bit. Death. Death is something that I've always talked about religion is something we always talk about. But when it actually happens to you, not you but when it happens like that, you know, and I don't even this what scares me about this situation, though? Is that like, I'm not close to him. Like I'm not we haven't really talked about so but yes, he's family. Yes. have memories of him. Yes. It's sad. Um, I can't imagine it being like what have happened your sister and she?

There's no I'm gonna I need everyone to put me into their will. Because when you die, I can't go back to work because I just came in. First of all, I hit with less questions. I work too. I'm like, I mean, I like it. Because I think they they're trying to show you that they care what you did get some days off. But I almost want to do like a 10. But what I do want to do is be like, Okay, everybody, I'm gonna do a presentation. This is what happened. I don't know exactly what's happening to explain, because I had explained like seven times in a row today. And I'm like, I know, they just care. So it's not like I don't want to keep doing like, so bad to be like, yeah, so you heard it in the lunch. Now, I'll tell you to, yes. My cousin died. Yes. Stephen was his name. Yeah. So he was out New York and Broadway. And yeah, that's right. Same story comes up. thing like, oh, and he loved Legos. And it's like, he really liked Daft Punk. Actually, you know, he used to as a kid. He's the he was gonna be an actor his whole life. He was six years old, and he would do puppets of his hands. Mario and Luigi. That's cool. That's what I missed. That's why I'm gonna miss. So anyway, that sound I know, I'm really sad about it. Like, it really is sad. That's why I'm saying if it's somebody even closer to me, like, Oh, my God, you're gonna be don't I want to have to come over and give you a big boy. And then I thought, am I in the season of my life that this is gonna start happening more? And the answer is yes. Oh, yeah. And the next people's parents are gonna start dying. Yeah, we're losing every well. Honestly, we might not be here another year, like, Yeah, that's fine. If we all go, I'm okay with that. It's not our families. It's the planet. Honestly, I hope we all go at one time, because then I won't feel bad. I won't do any more fucking weeks or anything. You'll miss it all missed it all like maybe the sun will just explode. We'll know in eight minutes. Yeah, it takes forever. And that's scary, too. And that's scary, too. Because they're like, eight minutes ago, this light was coming off the sun. But now I see eight minutes go just like these planets were seeing 72 billion years ago or something like I don't know. It's mind blowing when you really really really really think about like Wait so what shaped crazy anything? What if that whole thing is now exploded? But we won't know for 72 billion years? No, not that long. The universe is only like 14 Well, whatever your 2 billion I could be. I could work but don't worry Adam and Eve will save us and no and all these people

because that book is what we should be going off of. Yeah, we should definitely be going off that but then take a look at the universe you know, anything that existed? Right? I had no idea it was like there they were like that's the heavens they probably thought that are prevalent stars were Angel. No, they they thought they were holes in like a sheet and that was light coming through Stop it so that they thought those that was just like light coming through holes in the sky. They didn't think they were like actual things glowing. Yeah, I guess you wouldn't know people I'm telling this is yeah, that would actually be interesting to be placed on this planet right now. The way it is. Okay. And not know anything. Yeah, I thought about that. Like, how would we? Well, we scared shitless there's so much noise we don't this is why we're trying to get people to learn about it in school. So that like you know the basics and can recognize like, oh, no, the sun is the center of the solar system. We don't have to go through that again. How geometry works. There you go. Wow, there you have it out there. Ma'am. You did a very good job with the app. Do the math for them. Please show me some app. This is the sun Hi. Here's our Mercury Venus or Mars, Uranus, Neptune, Saturn, Jupiter, Jupiter to get more stupider. And where's Pluto kicked off? Oh, no. Well, there's a comment. dangerously close down. I'm wondering if this is gonna hit our trajectory. Like we spin back around like we're gonna run into hopefully, we might. Yeah, it could be a comment that takes us So could a coma be honest way that we don't even know about right now? I guess it's possible, but because even if we look out in the future, wouldn't it be like oh, that's 100 light years away? Yeah. It's just weird to think about time and everything. I know. I didn't take another puff. Yeah, I'm like, Honey, it's wearing off. It's time it's time it's time to talk about God. Did you have a story? Oh, yeah, yeah, we can talk about that. Yeah, let's do that. And then we'll do the the Bible and the government and then wrap up so that if they don't want to hear it, they can just oh yeah, that's a good point. But I will say if you if you skipped over our Bible study last week, you missed me shirtless. If your watch Go on YouTube and if you're on our podcast on we're trying to do is like bring it into our humor but like really read it as if we've never read it before to kind of like really break it down as adults and we're doing it for you so you should be entertained by this. So basically I found this out just today and I think it's hilarious in Minnesota this Republican controlled legislature passed a bill which you know, buried in there legalizes edibles up to five milligram so now like edibles actual THC Delta nine THC edibles, so does that make cannabis sorta legal? Sorta Yeah, what are you gonna do like if somebody shows up you like put on a piece of peanut butter like it's an edible if I cut this 95 times it's five milligrams each no people are like using hemp I guess and then making five milligram edibles I love it but honestly how are they going to know if it came from hemp or not? They're not or not and that's the whole point I have with legalizing hemp yeah I want you to that has THC in it so if you really want to like go there you can go go there honey go so I just think it's funny that basically are legislatures so I love I never understood they're acting like they're in chocolate why but can you explain to me how they bury stuff in bills like I never understood basically a bill is a bunch of like, legal jargon and it can be 1000 over 1000 pages long like you can get a bill and it's just like this got it and so you have to flip through and read every line and see like because there's so many fucking interns and right going through it and adding things like this right here's the part where they say no legalized we're gonna send another so the right roadwork and blah blah blah, road work and edibles. So I just like your mind, you're like, you're like why? Also we're gonna levels go and also the construction and be like, trying to like why now they've done that before. I never really understood the whole like, but that makes sense. That's bullshit. Now, is there a certain timeframe that they have to be able to if they want to pass a bill, I don't even care like you get at least 24 hours to read it over? Or is it like, here's the bill, let's vote. And if everyone wants to vote, then they vote. I think they would have to pass a new bill repealing just that part. And then it's a Democratic governor, so I don't think he'll sign it. So they'd have to like override a veto, but he's gonna we think he I think you're dead. Yeah, I fucking love it. I fucking love it. Yeah, so it's great. So they're like, can't smoke it though. They're now my Fact of the Day with that is that I found out that almost 40% of millennials smoke more than once a day. What not just smoke weed smoke more than once a day. I need to know the data on that because I don't know if 40% of my friends are smoking more than once a day. Maybe it's just like my crowd my sample size. Yeah, like because I'm not right. Like, but I could definitely take a couple edibles in a company. Yeah, you basically are. Okay, so you're in there. Yeah, like whatever. But like your partner doesn't and then like most of our friends don't. Right, like boring. But like but who do we hang out with your smart people? You're right. I'm like a stoner in a crowd full of squares squares. Oh, I like that. Yeah, god, you're so annoyed with me right next. I'm so high. No, I'm not okay. Thank you. I'm just coming up with I'm like, What could we call the people who don't do the wheat? Let's call the people. There's Where's square? What's that? Like? What's happened days? Yeah, it's old everybody, such as a foreigner. That's why Gen X is like social X is literal. You can think of anything, anyone? No one ever talks about Gen X ever really don't like ever because no one cares. Grunge. Okay, thank you, Brian. Like, and they're all dead. They will kill them. They all had heroin overdoses. So it's like right like that. They're done. They did they they had the theme and they did and if they think of me and the thing of it is they they did you see the PSA for the nuclear blast? Oh, my God.

So there's been a nuclear attack. Don't ask me how or why just know that the big one has hit. Okay. So what do we do? There are three important steps that I want you to remember. Step one, get inside fast. You your friends, your family, get inside, and no staying in the car is not an option. You need to get into a building and move away from the windows. Step two. Stay inside. shut all doors and windows. Have the basement head there. If you don't have one, get as far into the middle of the building as possible. If you were outside after the blast, get clean, immediately. Remove and bag all out our clothing to keep radioactive dust or ash away from your body. Step three. Stay tuned. Follow media for more information. Don't forget to sign up for notify NYC for official alerts and updates. And don't go outside until officials say it's safe. All right, this is real. You've got this.

All right. You've got us rail from the New York emergency management team like no you do not go Got this because you're dying in the nuclear bomb. Okay, so a few things were brought up on this. And the first question is why now? That you they know, yes. randomly out of left field. Oh, no. And I'm like, do they know there's like we're about to get bombed like what's happening? Are they about to like, I feel like we're about to be in Gilead. Oh no, but can you believe that PSA? No. I'm like, they're like, take everything off and baguette now use soap and water. And I'm like, there was just a blast. There's like glass in my eye. Okay, and then, like, go to a basement or the New York City. Yeah, I'm like, first of all, I didn't go into the basement New York say there's so many fucking gym rats. No, I would actually head to the subway. That'd be extra kind of smart. Yeah. And then you could get flooded and drown. So yeah, if you're in New York City, please be careful can feed. Yeah, I thought it was very a pet. It's like what are you talking about? Like, honey, honey, we're exposed to radiation. We're staying put because we were dust and we're gonna dust or to dust we shall return and we up in short. Return. But yeah, I thought oh my god. And then I was like he mentioned like the country version of that is a public service announcement. Crystal, we're live. Let's go on the air.

Ladies and gentlemen, if you've been caught in a nuclear weapon attack out in the country, we have some tips for you. Number one, find all your animals and make sure they're in the barn. Don't go out to the barn. If the attack has left radioactive dust dripping down from the sky burning your skin, go inside. Once you're inside. Step two, wash your feet. I mean, your whole body wants you to get in that big sink. You have the laundry one and hose yourself down. But all your clothes in the back and thrown down the ship. Step three. Hopefully your loved ones are inside. If they're not, leave them outside. Lock the door. It's time to hold tight. Why don't you go to the bedroom and lay down maybe have a good cry. Make sure you're not by a window. And these are three steps for how to survive a nuclear attack. Camera needs to be awesome crystal, please get the camera off crystal. God bless. We hope you enjoyed this PSA, please make sure you follow the instructions. Hey, what's that noise?

Yeah, so anyway, people are fucked up honey. They're scared of nuclear war. Again, though, look at the picture of the universe fucking thing called Web. Look at the web telescope pictures and tell me that any of this matters. Like you're gonna drop a bomb. Okay. Java pop

up. Oh, come on. You're gonna love that. Pop that out. You ended up poking mine. You're gonna drop an atomic bomb did not say that to play it back. I'm gonna play back. Even if I come out. You're.

You're like a tongue and he's speaking it's time for a Bible talk. I will talk now we're on the second store. Well, this is what they're calling like the second kind of story. Adam may love to his wife Eve and she became pregnant and gave birth to Cain. She said, with the help of the Lord, I have brought forth a man. I'm Kane. I like to work in the field. I'm really good looking. I'm like my dad and my mom that's out on my mom's eat if you didn't know. But yeah, so I'm gonna give this to God. And I'm gonna see what he thinks. Later, she gave birth to his brother, Abel. Okay, it's like really time from my side of the story, to be honest, because our canes have bitched. Like he's just mad. Because look at this hair. Okay, like obviously I got the better jeans, obviously, I look way better than him. I've just watched the sheep which is pretty easy. Pretty easy deal here. I hope God will be the light and love and love my shapes. Like I'm really hoping they like the shape. God now able kept flocks and cane work to the soil. In the course of time came brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord and Abel also brought in offering. Well, I don't want to say my teacher's pet but so I just gave it to God and He would rather play around Abel. Okay. And his sheep, or whatever the fuck. So, I'm pretty pissed off actually. Well, while you made king really mad, I'm a little bit jealous of my brother. So that's why I'm a little bit pest. Okay, so I'm gonna do something that nobody saw coming. The Lord looked with favor on Abel and his offering but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry and his face was downcast. Then the LORD said to Cain, why are you angry? Why is your face downcast if you do what is right will you not be accepted? But if you do, if you do not do what is right, sin is crouch. sitting at your door. It desires to have you but you must rollover. Now Cain said to his brother Abel, let's go out to the field. While they were there in the field. Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. What came? Yes, I'll come to the field. Yes. I'll come to the field. Yes, God.

Look over there. Yeah, that would be a great place for my Oh no, he's doing it. He's doing it. Oh, no.

I'm an angel now and you're in trouble. Then the LORD said to Cain, where's your brother Abel? I don't know. He replied. Am I my brother's keeper? The Lord said What have you done? Listen. What have you done your brother's blood cries out to me from the ground

aren't see those brothers blood. You knew our show perishing forever.

We're being very nice to me. So I figured the only way to get ahead is just to

kill off the job keep your brother like you're not really helping me here buddy. Oh, you killed your brother's keeper.

Now you're under a curse and driven from the ground which opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hands when you work the but you were just being so nice to him. So whatever job was much

okay, we'll just work on your rowing skills and we could have a better situation going here.

ground ground it will no longer yield at crop its crops for you. You will be restless wander on the earth oh my god, I kept looking for you. CAPTCHA you check your

crop and crop. Cain said to the Lord My punishment is more than I can bear today you are driving me from the land and I will be hidden from your presence. I will be a restless wander on the earth and whoever finds me will kill me. Got it? Which I you know, I guess I should have known that like I'm kind of stupid slow. Okay, I'm gonna go like have kids and you'll just drown them anyway later. But the Lord said him not so anyone who kills Cain will suffer vengeance seven times over than the Lord put a mark on Cain so that no one who found him would kill him. So Cain went out from the Lord's presence and lived in the land of Nod, East of Eden. And then I put Kent had a bunch of kids, but that won't matter soon because there's gonna be a flood. And then this is sort of this is gonna brief for next week. Okay, this is the line of Seth. This is the document containing the family records of Adam. On the day that God created man, He made Him in the likeness of God, He created them male and female. When they were created, He blessed them and called them mankind. Adam was 130 years old when he fathered a son in his likeness, according to his image and named him Seth. Like, what is going on? Like, what is going on that this world? Okay, this country, the world reads this reads this and goes and goes, this is life this is exactly this is the this is this is real. I mean, I would believe like Game of Thrones over this shit. At least Game of Thrones writer. Yeah, this is just this is true. And Cain and Abel went into a Fiat. Okay, so when Cain killed Abel, and the earth in your wallet of your brothers, and so God favored April's crop but not Kane's like livestock sacrifice. Why? I don't know. Why did God not like that? I don't know. And I don't know why God is such a dick. Because guess what comes up in the next like, 2000 years after this a Lamb of God, they sacrifice tons of animals at the Jewish temples. So I'm like, why? And then Jesus was him the Lamb of God who takes away the so I'm confused as a why, like, suddenly God likes the sacrificed animals. But not when Cain does it. Right. I think God really kind of fucked up at scratch sucked up. Yeah, he really maybe he was younger. During this time. He was dumb. Well, yeah, he's only one that could gain wisdom. Whoever else who tried to cut it was a sinner. And if you approach that tree, you're out but I'm gonna put it here for you. I'm also gonna put this thing here and but I'm gonna yell at him after he does exactly what I made him to just want to touch on that. That's the first bite. I was reading a little extra on it. That's the first murder. Oh, yeah, that's right. Read about the first murder ever. People murder mystery, and they believe this is real. Like this is the first murder. Murder Mystery. The Bible? A murder mystery.

Was it cane? Or was it a bowl?

Because if they're twins, especially like you can't tell I think the twins have the same decks. Oh, I want to see a real set of twins. They do actually have the same decks we heard because there is like twin porn out there you would know would not believe it but there is I've looked like that was at the same Dixon like you've definitely seen twin barn that was a rhetorical question twin form where they're fucking each other so so I haven't gone that far. It's I definitely want to see their penises like because I was always curious like, because when you go through puberty, then you both know like, I knew twins. And I asked them if they did that. And they're like, yeah, we've measured we've we've checked Yeah, like they're twins. They're like they like sticks out but they're the same person. It's weird twins are fucking weird. No twins are twins are freaks. Let's just call a spade a fair twin in Columbus. We want to talk to you because We do now I actually hooked up with one of the twins and a Notre Dame. Yes and what was the twin doing to you? So knocking you off? Well, I went over to his dorm room and I thought I had like seen him out before but of course it was his brother or they both gay or is one gay one straight or either on gay this one was gay one was straight. Okay. Which is interesting. Yeah. If the wonder which ones game went from the straight we don't believe you that our view? Well, based on what happened like a bisexual dorm room. This one was gay. Or at least by or non non straight, non bounce straight. That's what I that's my term. Yeah. We're all non straights. Anyway, okay, I don't know what we were talking about. I don't either. All right. Well, then we're moving on to the government. Four score and seven years ago, our forefathers were here. It could not have a falling down, falling down falling down. London Bridge is falling down My fair lady. I really liked this little like, I like this little quote. Should we bring things back this haircut? I am an Esquire. Oh my god. Imagine this haircut comes back. It's always coming back. This is like, come out again. This is coming out. This is chromatica

Okay, so let's talk about the First Amendment, which is very important in this day and age. Do this last time I thought no, we did the second okay. Talked about guns this week. I want to talk about this because I found some religious videos that I need to show you.

God created government. So I got sent to the harvest field of government and again it's a Christmas verse But Isaiah nine six on to us the child will be born on to us a son will be given and what? The government will rest on his shoulders. Well, guys, again, where is God today? Is he in Jerusalem, and a temple? Where his shoulders, head, shoulders, knees and his shoulders are your shoulders. So if the government rests on his shoulders, and we are not in government, helping government influencing government if we abdicate government and politics, are we living out Genesis one and Isaiah nine? No, no, we've got to put this into practice.

This lady is running for something somewhere Senate or something? I can't. So that's what made me prompt me to look up the First Amendment. Yeah, I want to discuss it. So if you would like to go ahead and read it for us, Charles see or Amendment One. Chuck? It's Chuck. Chuck. Chuck. I don't think a drama got drunk from you do kind of look like you. I'm from Virginia. A little too much bourbon, okay, from Virginia West.

Okay, Amendment One, Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech or of the press, or the right of the people peaceably to assemble and to petition the government for a redress of grievances. That makes a bunch of sense. Okay, basically, you should have the freedom to speak on your opinion without being persecuted, as well as so then it breaks it down a little bit. So we have the freedom of religion. So there are two clauses in the First Amendment that guarantee the freedom of religion. The Establishment Clause prohibits the government from passing legislation to establish an official religion or preferring one religion over another. That was the exact if I was a lawyer. That's exactly what I'm taking into that one and be like, This is why it's not on your shoulders, honey. Yes, the knees hold where she was like, we chose her one religion over there. We're not going to be like, Oh, your Christian beliefs are what we're going to pass now right now. So that's so No, ma'am. Because guess they're Satanists. There's Jews. There's Muslims. There's atheists, atheists, they're like our own religions universe. It enforces the separation of church and state. The Free Exercise Clause prohibits the government in most instances from interfering with a person's practice of their religion so I'm sure if it was like a harmful religion that's when they're gonna like if you're killing people or like a call, kind of like what Christianity is. So I thought it was very interesting though. Like I that was the first thing I saw I was like, Yep, we're doing art or we're doing amendment one. Yeah. So what is the next situation and freedom of speech freedom of the press, the most basic component of freedom of expression is right to freedom of speech, freedom of speech may be exercised in a direct like words or symbolic like actions way the right to freedom of speech allows individuals to express themselves without government interference or regulation, right. It's basically basically what it's saying is that you can do free speech you can't harm somebody or you can't Yeah, you can't be like, fucking gang Mike Pence. You can't Yeah, you can't talk about illegal things. Hang my battery one to crack now. Yeah, it's like okay, so that's right to assemble right to petition the right to assemble allows people to gather for peaceful and lawful purposes. implicit within this right is the right of association and belief, okay? To assemble to protest, basically, you can protest peacefully but you can't be charging into the Capitol building. I'm basically like, I just think that a lot of stuff that's happening right now and I'm like this right out there about the Second Amendment, but this really is the amendment we need to focus on because you're saying that you need that God is the shoulders of the government. No, like, no, that's literally the first thing in the Bill of Rights. Right. I think we are score should join a Satanist church just for fun. No. And also to say like, well, it's our religion. And so like, if we get any complaints or something is hard, not allowed. It's like, well, that's part of our religion. Why are LGBTQIA plus people so stupid? We just need to form a church and LGBTQ the queer church. And it's a religion. And then boom, we all worship we gather on Sundays, we do brunch, brunch, honey, well, we do have a religion. I mean, we do our religion to like incorporate it and be like, everyone become a member and then we won't pay taxes on all these buildings will make big nightclubs. We're calling it a worship, and sex is our form of worship.

So there you have it. Um, and then sodomy couldn't be illegal again. I don't know why we haven't done that yet. Mine. Abortion is one of our rituals. Right? Sorry. It's a sacred we're here sacrificing the sacrifice of the war. We killed Jesus. So why can't we kill a clump of cells? Exactly. Good. I thought that was very eye opening. You really got to start well, I'm making it but like we don't like when you hear the story in the Bible. First of all, everything I'm also noticing is that women are just like, really? Oh, yeah, like trash the trash of the earth. It's sad. It's very sad. Okay. Oh, glad came out with a report. Report. Glad came out with a report today. Glad gives social media giants poor grades over lack of protections for LGBT users. Social media platforms are active participants in the rise of anti LGBTQ culture, climate, and their only response can be to urgently create safer products and policies and then enforce those policies. What now glad did applaud Tik Tok and Twitter for prohibiting users from mis gendering or dead naming people? There's some social media that is working on things others and then Elon Musk buys it and then and then goes out of it. Now he's being sued. Did you hear that? Oh, yeah, he

should. And did you see the professor school Adam Holly playing,

he referred to people with a capacity for pregnancy? Would that be women? Many women, sis women have the capacity for pregnancy, many sis women do not have the capacity for pregnancy. There are also trans men who are capable of pregnancy as well as non binary people who are capable of pregnancy. So this isn't really a women's rights issue. It's we should recognize that this impacts women while also recognizing that it impacts other groups. Those things are not mutually exclusive. Senator Holly Oh, so your view is is that the core of this, this right then is about what? So I want to recognize that your line of questioning is transphobic. And it opens up trans people to violence by not recognizing that, oh, you're saying that I'm opening up people to violence by asking whether or not women are the folks who can have pregnancies so I'm one I want to note that one out of five transgender persons have attempted suicide. So I think it's important in my line of questioning because we can't talk about it because denying that trans people exist and pretending not to know that they exist. I'm denying that trans people exist by asking are you if you're Are you? When are you in pregnancy so you believe that men can get pregnant? No, I don't think you're denying that trans people look this thing that leads to violence. Is this how you run your classroom are students allowed to question you are they also treated like this? We're gonna they're opening up people to violence. We have a good class you should join. You might learn a lot. Well, I would learn a lot I've learned a lot lately extraordinary.

Josh, he's a Josh is a Josh he's like So are you saying women? She's like No, but I loved I wish I could speak like she's like I just want to let you know that you're being transphobic but the way she's gonna attack me and calm I'm leading to violence. Yes. The left is such extremist Oh, because we want to be Oh, but guns. Oh, but guns are not extreme. But and also by the way, I saw that video that you posted a of the you've awfully you've already Yeah, the Uvalde shooting and the all the cops just standing there 77 minutes. And you see the guy with the Punisher? Yeah, he's just looking at his phone. Oh, the Punisher logo. You know what that is? I read about it. It's like, it's a lot white supremacist. Yeah. Which makes us Mexican. So I don't really know how that works, but they're all in on it. If you're a cop, you are literally standing there looking at your phone while there are kids being murdered and they hear shots and then they retreat. They don't go towards you say we need more gun retract. Yeah, got it. Okay. Everybody's instinct is to run you fucking timeout. Good guys with guns are going to stop this. Oh, wait, they don't. We just learned that. Yeah. But I'm also Yeah, that whole video was kind of disturbing. It's disturbing, because you see them walk in and you're like, he's just going in and killing kids. And then the video tells you we have edited out the screams of children I know. Yeah, it's terrible. Fuck this world. Yeah, sorry about your cousin. Yeah, sorry, but honestly, he might be in a better place. Yeah, this he knows all the answers. Now. He looks around. He's like, Fuck this, but also don't look at me naked. I feel like that's just like actually. I'm at my new expression. Now. I'm, we're all humans. Yeah, we're all wearing khaki rings and ball rings and sometimes you got to fluff it up. And that's okay. That'll be my Sondra Sondra, you can wear that the next time we go out to a wall and just have a little have a little floss semi. Yeah, I'm gonna wear that and this wig. I think I really want to do you'd clean up when stuck on my George Washington. You want to suck on this George Washington, Washington apple. I'm going to cut down your cherry tree. Oh, apples and cherries. Why is there always a fruit tree involved too. And all these stories? It's like God damn, I'm over it. I'm over it. It's all fake. I'm telling you what we're all this is all fucking simulation. Yeah, I know. There's a lot of hair in this. If this is how it was back in the 1750s. How did these men women, but non binary people do this? They were all our founding fathers actually founding days. Because look at what they were they were healed. This is gas. They were tight. They were this they probably had makeup. No, they didn't have Yeah. Rosae so they were all Jake. Great. I can't they are. They're all homosexual days. And great. I kind of keep thinking when I'm looking on the screen though. We look either like Russians or like, like their little Davy Crocker hat. I looked like Mary had a little shoe do a little grin. You look like my knees. Well, this has been another episode of not well, we will see you soon. Make sure you hug your loved one this week because you never know when it's gonna be your last day on earth. Unless they're like in another city and you can't but still think of all your love. Just think of them and pray. Prayer will fix pray for the LGBTQ prayers, thoughts and prayers. Thank you. Goodbye. Goodbye. And see this is so tight. Oh, oh I just said thank you again for watching our show. And please check out our other videos somewhere around the screen. And also please subscribe and share with your friends because it's really important to us. Thank you